Spring In Copenhagen (Borgen, Birgitte)

[Chanel_no5]

***Note***

I struggle with my writing lately, but I may have binged nine episodes in a row of this and I was... inspired. This lady’s absolutely gorgeous nose made me battle my difficulties with the Danish language to the point where I started watching this show (thank God for subtitles, is all I have to say about it...), and DAMN it's good! And DAMN, what a nose that woman has...   So here’s the fanfic that I never thought I’d write, about a show I never thought I’d watch, but that I am now smitten with. 

Technically, I guess this is not so much a fanfic as it is pollen porn.

Pollen porn.   
 

Screenshot pics for reference to those who want it, or use your imagination if you don't.  

Spoiler

 

 

 

***

The Prime Minister walked into the conference room in a brisk pace, her heels clacking hard against the floor and announcing her hurry.

“I hope we can get this over with quickly, I ha-AASCHHOO!”

The sneeze exploded out of her with no warning – or rather, she’d had plenty of warning all morning, a relentless, intense tickle that never really left her nose this time of year, but it only ended up in false starts. Until now. And Birgitte knew from only too much experience, that once she got started, she’d just keep going.

No. Not today. She did not have time for any allergic meltdowns today, no matter how lavishly the birch trees bloomed. She decided to push on, mind over matter, she could keep her nose in check if she really had to, and she had to.

“-excuse me, I have another meeting in…” she checked her wristwatch, “twenty-five minutes.” She sat down. “So. What the hell are our options in this mess? Do we give the opposition what they want?”

“We can’t go further than we already have just to please…”

Birgitte already knew what they were going to say, because she had been over their options herself a thousand times already, but she had to have the input of her coalition parties’ leaders, keep them included so they could show a united front outward. Knowing already what they would end up agreeing on, not because it was a good decision but because it was the least awful, she allowed her thoughts to drift. Unfortunately, they drifted to the one thing she didn't want to think about. 

Spring in Copenhagen. The past few days had been quite warm, and as a result, the birch trees showed off their tiny new green leaves with gleeful carelessness, their heavy catkins just bursting with pollen. So, so much pollen. The yellowish hell dust hitched a hike with the ever-changing spring breeze until it coated everything with a thin but inescapable layer of nature’s own itching powder. It wasn't personal, and she knew that, but sometimes Birgitte felt like nature had a personal vendetta against her. Trees, flowers, grass, if it had pollen she'd be miserably allergic to it.

She felt the tickle in her nose worsen, blossoming into that tell-tale prickle that announced loud and clear to her that a full-blown sneezing fit was imminent. She raised her hand up to her face, pressing her knuckles against the underside of her quivering nose. Then she began rubbing it, wincing a little at the wet, squishy sound but kept rubbing, back and forth, realising that this was a big mistake when her touch aggravated the irritation further. 

The rubbing turned into a pinch, a desperate attempt at holding back the very thing she had accidentally set in motion.

 “Birgitte? Birgitte? Are you still with us?”

She blinked. It felt like she had sand in her eyes; they were gritty and watery, and her eyelids fluttered as she struggled not to give in to her allergies.

“Yes, sorry, I think I’m going to sneeze agaihhh…” the sentence rose in pitch and ended in an airy exhale, it was as if her body pushed the remaining air out of her lungs so she could fill them to full capacity with the next breath. Her head tilted back a little, the reddened wings of her nose crinkling and trembling. For a moment she was frozen in a perfect still image of allergic agony, unable to do anything but suffer as the immense sting overtook her entire nose. Then she took a deep, helpless, shuddering breath, and her head immediately bobbed forward with a fiercely stifled triple as she fought with all her might to keep the sneezes from getting any further than the back of her throat. Only that in turn made her throat tickle worse than it already was, and a strange combination of a cough and a sneeze escaped her. That was like opening the floodgates.

“NkTSCHgh! HeeESCHoo! ESSCHOO! AEESCHH! HaaSCHEW!”

She gasped for air, tears running down her cheeks, her nose streaming. She tried to force herself to stop, but the more she fought against her own body, the more it rebelled.

She could not stop sneezing. And it started to get painfully obvious to the other meeting attendees.

“Well, I guess we won’t get further at the moment…”

Birgitte shook her head, unable to speak at all through the hitching and sneezing, and waited for the rest of them to get up and leave before she dared to remove her hands from her face. Once they had left, she got up and hurried down the hall to her office, still cupping one hand over her nose and mouth, more to hide the resulting mess of this maddening fit than to contain the sneezes themselves.

Kasper waited outside her office when she arrived, and followed her in.

“Before we even get started, you’re taking those prescription drugs you refuse to take because they make you drowsy. And don’t say you’re fine. I’m not blind.”

“EASSCHOO!”

“Or deaf.”

She sniffled loudly.

"I have meetings all day, I can't take those."

Birgitte snatched a whole handful of tissues from the box on her desk, put her poor nose in the whole wad, and blew as hard as she could.

“Your prescription drugs,” Kasper said again. Birgitte glared at him over the tissues.

“Did you hear me? I prefer not to sleepwalk into meetings with my ministers. AESCHHOO! HeeyIISCHHoo!”

“Yeah, well. It’s better to be a bit drowsy during meetings than to sneeze nonstop through them,” he said, and on second thought, Birgitte supposed that she could agree on that.

 

Edited May 25, 2019 by Chanel_no5

[InLivingColor]

I've never seen the show before, or heard of it for that matter, but I still loved this. Pollen porn is my favourite kind! 😂 I can see what you were saying about her facial features as well, quite inspirational 😉

[Selene]

Could not hit that "reveal hidden contents" - button fast enough  I knew what she looked like, but there's always room for more smexy pictures of her ^^

 

On 4/18/2019 at 3:12 AM, Chanel_no5 said:

She did not have time for any allergic meltdowns today

Never think this as a sneezefic protagonist or you are bound to be doomed *rubs hands waiting for character's sneezy downfall* 

I'm so glad your writing muse is back! And this piece deserves the term "pollen porn" very much! 

Loved the detailed descriptions of all the sensations leading up to the sneeze. You have a great attention to detail and all the weird stages a body goes through in preparation of a sneeze 😍❤️

Thanks for sharing this with us! 

[Reader]

Coming into this blindly with just my faith in you as an amazing writer.....

Whoa Mama that was HOT!! You write itchy so well and your descriptions are definitely in a fetishist’s spank bank! Pollen porn indeed!

[Chanel_no5]

On ‎4‎/‎19‎/‎2019 at 10:35 PM, Reader said:

Coming into this blindly with just my faith in you as an amazing writer.....

Whoa Mama that was HOT!! You write itchy so well and your descriptions are definitely in a fetishist’s spank bank! Pollen porn indeed!

Awww, thank you so, so much!!  

On ‎4‎/‎19‎/‎2019 at 10:16 PM, Selene said:

Could not hit that "reveal hidden contents" - button fast enough  I knew what she looked like, but there's always room for more smexy pictures of her ^^

 

Never think this as a sneezefic protagonist or you are bound to be doomed *rubs hands waiting for character's sneezy downfall* 

I'm so glad your writing muse is back! And this piece deserves the term "pollen porn" very much! 

Loved the detailed descriptions of all the sensations leading up to the sneeze. You have a great attention to detail and all the weird stages a body goes through in preparation of a sneeze 😍❤️

Thanks for sharing this with us! 

Hehehe, I totally agree on the smexy pictures.   Thank you so, very much!!  

On ‎4‎/‎19‎/‎2019 at 8:38 PM, InLivingColor said:

I've never seen the show before, or heard of it for that matter, but I still loved this. Pollen porn is my favourite kind! 😂 I can see what you were saying about her facial features as well, quite inspirational 😉

Thank you, I'm so glad you gave it a chance despite not knowing of the show!   It's a political drama, the events start three days before the Danish election. Birgitte Nyborg is the leader of a small centre-left party De Moderate, and through a political fluke, she becomes the Prime Minister. It doesn't sound like the most exciting premise for a drama show, but it's incredibly good! Mmmhmmm, she has a very inspiring profile, doesn't she? ^^ I'm not normally much of a "nose girl", but in this case… I definitely am.