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The downside of becoming human (Detroit: Become Human, Connor, M)


SneezyHolmes

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16 minutes ago, Akahana said:

Ahhhh~ I’m watching GTLive play this game and Connor is honestly the most compelling character in the game!!  I live the character interactions between him and Connor and I think you nailed it <3

I love the Game Theorist! And Connor is the best android for sure, thanks for reading! <3333

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Oh my goooood.  I have read about this game.  I cannot play this game because I only have a PS3.  But if I could play this game I would be obsessed with this game.  But I feel like I've read enough about it to sort of mostly know how the story goes.  I think?  I hope? 

Anyway.  This is just so good.   You have absolutely NAILED the question of how to make androids "sick" effectively.  It's kinda perfect.  I want to steal your ideas.  I won't, but I want to! :D It's so perfect.  I love the "energy levels" readings and everything.  You have done such a good job of describing an approximation of what it would be for androids to be "sick", to the point where I would love to describe how great I think it is, but I have no words left after reading this.

Also I noticed you started this by saying you're not a good writer.  Dude, you are one of the best damn writers I know of- to the point where if I log on to the forum and see you've written something I will eagerly read it even if I'm not into the characters and that is rare for me.  So just own your awesomeness, okay? :)

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1 hour ago, SleepingPhlox said:

Oh my goooood.  I have read about this game.  I cannot play this game because I only have a PS3.  But if I could play this game I would be obsessed with this game.  But I feel like I've read enough about it to sort of mostly know how the story goes.  I think?  I hope? 

Anyway.  This is just so good.   You have absolutely NAILED the question of how to make androids "sick" effectively.  It's kinda perfect.  I want to steal your ideas.  I won't, but I want to! :D It's so perfect.  I love the "energy levels" readings and everything.  You have done such a good job of describing an approximation of what it would be for androids to be "sick", to the point where I would love to describe how great I think it is, but I have no words left after reading this.

Also I noticed you started this by saying you're not a good writer.  Dude, you are one of the best damn writers I know of- to the point where if I log on to the forum and see you've written something I will eagerly read it even if I'm not into the characters and that is rare for me.  So just own your awesomeness, okay? :)

Can't lie, I bought a PS4 off Facebook just to play this game! :laugh: 

I can't take all the credit for those ideas, I have a LOT of android headcanons across the net to thank for that! But I'm super glad you enjoyed it and I'm flattered that you think I'm such a good writer! :blush: I'm certainly trying, that's for sure! Thanks for reading, Phlox, you're the best! :hug::heart: 

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  • 4 weeks later...
7 hours ago, Ciuty80 said:

Can't wait to see what happens next :wub:
I like sneezing connor, so cute! :D

 

Part 3 is in the works now! Glad you liked it and thanks for reading! :D

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  • 1 month later...

I'm being patient. :whistle2:  The fact that so many of us want the update is proof of how well-done this story is, so I shall wait... and wait... and occasionally poke at you in the most polite way I can manage :poke:

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2 hours ago, BookQ36 said:

I'm being patient. :whistle2:  The fact that so many of us want the update is proof of how well-done this story is, so I shall wait... and wait... and occasionally poke at you in the most polite way I can manage :poke:

Not sure when the update will be, sadly, but I'm glad you like it!

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I know I said I wasn't sure when I'd update again, but I sat down after work last night and made myself finish part 3 after spending most of my shift thinking about what @BookQ36 said and how I could finish the next two chapters counting this one. Although, I have no clue where I'm going with this story after the next chapter so any suggestions would be much appreciated! :) Also, the next chapter will make up for the lack of sneezing in this one!

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Chapter 3: Back at the Precinct

 

The precinct was bustling as usual, countless cops either at their desks working on reports or busy ushering criminals into their awaiting cells. A few greeted them but Connor showed little to no interest in being his usual friendly self and greeting back, favoring to stick close to Hank instead, accidentally bumping into him when the man stopped abruptly to speak with Captain Fowler who as usual seemed worked up over the cases.

“Wait at your desk for me, Connor. I’ll be right back..”,he grumbled over his shoulder at the android, following Fowler with all the enthusiasm of a half dead animal being poked with a stick.

Connor merely nodded before flopping down into his desk chair with a heavy sigh. He wondered briefly for a moment what Hank was getting yelled at for this time, head lazily lulling to the side in the direction of Fowler’s transparent office, watching with idle patience as the captain threw his hands up repeatedly and paced about. A quick scan indicated his blood pressure was at abnormal levels, no doubt from stress as he was almost as bad as Hank at managing said stress.

His deductions were interrupted however as an overly familiar condescending voice called out his name followed by a loud thud on his desk. He turned to see Gavin with both hands firmly planted on his desk, looking all too sly for Connor’s liking but still he offered a curt greeting,”Oh..good afternoon, Gavin. Can I..help you?”.

“I’m actually glad you asked, robo-boy. I’ve got some evidence I want you to take a look at. The lab’s busy so I need you to scan some stuff.”,he half demanded, paying no heed to how off Connor currently looked,”So hop to it, let’s go. Chop, chop!”.

“But, I was given instruction tdo wait here for Hank, though. I can’t help you right ndow..”,he sniffled, giving a slight shake of his head before looking up at Gavin blearily, a trail of thirium running down his upper lip, standing out noticeably against his pallid skin. Even if he wasn’t feeling off though, he wouldn’t want to help him but that was beside the point right now.

Gavin looked remarkably unimpressed, scoffing slightly before leaning in a bit,”Maybe I didn’t make myself clear? I said, I need you to scan some evidence for me. And that wasn’t a request. Now hop to it.”. He glared at Connor, his biased hatred burning clearly in his eyes.

“And I informed you that I’mb already following a command from Hank--!”,he trailed off as he found himself being yanked upwards by his normally neat and straight tie, finding himself nearly face to face with a very irate Gavin,”I must suggest letting go of mbe at once..”.

“Oh yeah? Or what?”,his arm reared back in preparation for a hit despite all eyes being on him at this point.

“Or I’m gonna kick your ass.”

The gruff threat half startled him, his grip on Connor’s tie unintentionally loosening as he half turned to see Hank staring down at him with a calm yet intimidating look. He looked between the two men for a moment before grunting in agitation and rudely shoving Connor away, stomping off towards the evidence room.

Hank sighed lazily and crossed his arms,”I leave you alone for ten minutes and you almost get your ass kicked. What would you do without me?”. There was a hint of playfulness in his tone, not actually mad at the android. Funny how much a piece of plastic could grow on him in the few months that they’d been partners. So much so that he was actually a bit worried now that he properly took in his appearance. Could robots be pale? Was that a thing?

“Mby apologies, Hank. I didn’t intend for Mr. Reed tdo become so agrehh--aggressive.”,his words faltered, breath seeming to hitch before leveling out once more,”At any rate, what did Fowler want..oh?”. He was caught off guard by the sudden presence of Hank’s large palm against his forehead.

“Yeah, he’s a real douchebag.”,he said absentmindedly, brow furrowing a bit at the warmth currently radiating over his hand,”And don’t worry about it. What matters right now is that you’re burning up, Connor..is that supposed to be happening?”.

A half shrug was his only answer.

“That doesn’t tell me much!”,he huffed,”You gonna be okay to sit here while I work?”.

“I’mb more than capable of doing desk work too..”,he grumbled, turning slightly to cough into the crook of his elbow. The sound was oddly metallic and punctuated with the faintest of thumps as if something was hitting his chest cavity, presumably an android version of a chesty cough,”I’mb not even that sigk..just a minor mbalware virus.”.

Hank looked unamused as he sat down in his chair, bringing up the file database on his computer,”Riiight, and that’s why you sound like you swallowed a frog, have cotton shoved up your nose and have thirium running down your face? And the fever’s totally nothing too, right? At the very least do us both a favor and blow your nose.”.

Connor looked perplexed as he fished the handkerchief out of his pocket. He didn’t need to eat much less swallow amphibious creatures? “Mby apologies Hank but I don’t have any stored data regarding ‘swallowing a frog’? I think I’d remember such a thing..”,he gave his nose a hardy blow, the sound resonating throughout the precinct and turning a few heads.

“It’s a figure of speech..it just means you sound like shit.”.

“Oh, well, I still must disagree. My voice emulator is still functional.”.

“Shut up, Connor..”.

“Yes, Detective.”

Edited by SneezyHolmes
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You could do something where Fowler calls Hank and Connor to a crime scene, and Hank tries to explain that Connor not in the greatest shape but Fowler doesn't want to hear it and sends the two of them anyway. Hank, still insistent on having Connor rest, tell him that he can cover for him at the crime scene so that Connor can rest and take care of the virus. 

But Connor being the stubborn android he insists that he's fine and can go investigate with Hank...so Hank agrees to let him come along on one condition. If Connor can go the entire investigation of the crime scene without sneezing and spraying thirium all over the crime scene. Connor thinks this is easy enough agreeing...until they get to the crime scene and Connor realizes he may have made a miscalculation as some of the sensors in his nose are more sensitive than he was expecting and something at the crime scene is really bugging them.

And Hank, being a little shit knows exactly what's going on and tries to sabotage Connor. 

 

 

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7 hours ago, Bisexualien1996 said:

You could do something where Fowler calls Hank and Connor to a crime scene, and Hank tries to explain that Connor not in the greatest shape but Fowler doesn't want to hear it and sends the two of them anyway. Hank, still insistent on having Connor rest, tell him that he can cover for him at the crime scene so that Connor can rest and take care of the virus. 

But Connor being the stubborn android he insists that he's fine and can go investigate with Hank...so Hank agrees to let him come along on one condition. If Connor can go the entire investigation of the crime scene without sneezing and spraying thirium all over the crime scene. Connor thinks this is easy enough agreeing...until they get to the crime scene and Connor realizes he may have made a miscalculation as some of the sensors in his nose are more sensitive than he was expecting and something at the crime scene is really bugging them.

And Hank, being a little shit knows exactly what's going on and tries to sabotage Connor. 

 

 

Ohh..I like that idea! I think I'll use it for chapter five! Thank you! :D

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1 hour ago, SneezyHolmes said:

Ohh..I like that idea! I think I'll use it for chapter five! Thank you! :D

Your welcome friend.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Oh my god Hank's very casual attitude to caretaking (the way he teases after he drives Gavin off, the absentminded way he feels Connor's forehead) is killing me, I love them. I love them. The way Connor's coughing is interesting, too, and makes me wonder if malware might not have physical effects - like, making something actually come loose in Connor's chest that Hank has to dig out or reconnect. (Hank would be so grossed out, whee a good time for everyone!) I'm also enjoying how you show Connor being out of it, him not being interested in hearing what's happening in the meeting with Fowler even though we know he normally would be, the way he flops into the chair and seems to sort of zone out afterward, etc. 

This is lovely. It made me happy to see another chapter. Thanks!

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22 minutes ago, Orionbob said:

Oh my god Hank's very casual attitude to caretaking (the way he teases after he drives Gavin off, the absentminded way he feels Connor's forehead) is killing me, I love them. I love them. The way Connor's coughing is interesting, too, and makes me wonder if malware might not have physical effects - like, making something actually come loose in Connor's chest that Hank has to dig out or reconnect. (Hank would be so grossed out, whee a good time for everyone!) I'm also enjoying how you show Connor being out of it, him not being interested in hearing what's happening in the meeting with Fowler even though we know he normally would be, the way he flops into the chair and seems to sort of zone out afterward, etc. 

This is lovely. It made me happy to see another chapter. Thanks!

Ahh, thank you! I'm really glad you liked it and I appreciate your kind words! :D Hmm, that coughing theory is pretty interesting, I might have to include it! The next chapter is gonna be Thirium heavy, so there will be plenty of grossed out Hank to love! 

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2 hours ago, Orionbob said:

Oh my god Hank's very casual attitude to caretaking (the way he teases after he drives Gavin off, the absentminded way he feels Connor's forehead) is killing me, I love them. I love them. The way Connor's coughing is interesting, too, and makes me wonder if malware might not have physical effects - like, making something actually come loose in Connor's chest that Hank has to dig out or reconnect. (Hank would be so grossed out, whee a good time for everyone!) I'm also enjoying how you show Connor being out of it, him not being interested in hearing what's happening in the meeting with Fowler even though we know he normally would be, the way he flops into the chair and seems to sort of zone out afterward, etc. 

This is lovely. It made me happy to see another chapter. Thanks!

Lol I can imagine Connor coughing and shaking something loose. This is just when he's already give in to his suffering, and just croaky and whining about how he need's Hanks help to fix the thing. Hank just being like fix it yourself and Connor just whining with his puppy dog eye out like, but Hank I can't reach it because of coarse Connor screws something up in a place he can't manually fix himself.

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On 9/15/2018 at 9:53 AM, SneezyHolmes said:

Ahh, thank you! I'm really glad you liked it and I appreciate your kind words! :D Hmm, that coughing theory is pretty interesting, I might have to include it! The next chapter is gonna be Thirium heavy, so there will be plenty of grossed out Hank to love! 

Ooh I look forward to it! After I said that I realized I should have suggested he sneeze so hard it knocks something loose, instead, and started imagining if like, he couldn't stop sneezing even when Hank was trying to be really careful about reaching in there to fix him. I don't know if that's even workable or if you have a different vision for the story or what, but I thought you guys might enjoy the mental image. Because I'm enjoying it. 

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47 minutes ago, Orionbob said:

Ooh I look forward to it! After I said that I realized I should have suggested he sneeze so hard it knocks something loose, instead, and started imagining if like, he couldn't stop sneezing even when Hank was trying to be really careful about reaching in there to fix him. I don't know if that's even workable or if you have a different vision for the story or what, but I thought you guys might enjoy the mental image. Because I'm enjoying it. 

I'll see what I can do! :) Writing androids is new for me so I'm not 100% sure/confident of what I can and can't write/include.

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Great job. I had no clue anything about this game, but, I totally caught on to these characters. Definitely super creative, amazing writing my friend, looking forward to the next chapter.

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8 minutes ago, Kimberly said:

Great job. I had no clue anything about this game, but, I totally caught on to these characters. Definitely super creative, amazing writing my friend, looking forward to the next chapter.

Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it! :) 

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Chapter 4: Of Ailing Androids and Helpful Partners

 

The clock seemed to tick by slowly, each passing minute dragging on longer than the last. Normally the construct of time was irrelevant to Connor as his actions were often calculated enough to be completed down to a fraction of a second but for some reason it seemed that every time he glanced at the clock, the hands had barely moved. He really just wanted to go back home with Hank and finish his recharge plus his thirium levels were really starting to go haywire and he found himself sniffling nearly every minute or so.

Hehh..”,he paused, head tilted back just enough to give any passerby a quick glimpse of the very inner rims of his ever reddening nostrils complete with the faintest of blue tints thanks to the thirium,”O-Ohh..?”. His hand lowered as the itch died down, leaving him both relieved and frustrated at the same time. Sneezing was tedious and the handkerchief Hank had given him earlier was rather used at this point but in the same breathe the itch remained regardless of how mild or not it was.

He just needed to focus on work and nothing else. Those were his orders, plain and simple. Even if the itch was getting worse again and maybe if he just rubbed his nose real quick..?

Hh’GStCHh! Heh’TSChhh!”,he snapped forward, spraying his desk and computer screen in flecks of glistening blue fluid,”Hihh..Hh’GSTChh!”.

Hank, having been stealing glances every now and then from over his screen, grimaced noticeably but offered a half hearted,“Gesundheit!”.

“Th-Thagksstschh! ‘GsTChh! H-Hehhh’TSCHH!”,each sneeze sent a fine mist of blue drifting down onto his desk and anything unfortunate enough to be caught in the crossfire. He let an exasperated sigh escape his parted lips, thirium dribbling over them and collecting at the bottom of his chin. His hand swiped at the liquid, watching passively as some of it absorbed into the cuff of his suit, temporarily staining the fabric blue.

Another lazy blessing was offered from Hank as well as one or two more from various officers around the room. His sneezes were starting to garner attention, mainly from curious or otherwise baffled onlookers that were equally unaware that androids could sneeze.

“Hank, I hate tdo bother you but you wouldn’t happen tdo have tissues over there, would you? Mby nose seems tdo insist on continuing to run and it’s proving problematic..and messy.”,he murmured softly.

The grizzled man leaned back in his chair, giving Connor a pointed look before shaking his head,”Uh, no? But there might be some in the break room--”. He trailed off when he noticed the overly distant and glazed over look on his partner’s face, arms crossing slowly over his broad chest.

Hh’NxTChh! ‘NxTChh!”,the robot’s hands flew up to his face quickly, managing to contain the spray this time around but at the cost of coating his hands in the colored liquid. He shakily got to his feet, hands cupped firmly over his face as he staggered towards the break room, sneezing thrice more in rapid succession as he went, the sound echoing out around him.

A few of the lingering gazes quickly shifted from the sneezing bot to Hank as if wordlessly asking what that was about.

After a few moments, Hank grunted and got to his feet, lazily shoving his hands in his pockets and making his way towards the breakroom,”Ya’ll act like you’ve never seen a sneezin’ android before..jeez.”.

He’d barely made it to the doorway when he heard Connor in the middle of another fit, gently knocking on the doorframe to avoid startling him,”Hey..you, uh, okay in here? Did you find the tissues?”.

The only response he got was another loud sneeze followed by a harsh coughing fit that seemed to leave the poor guy swaying on his feet. He clutched a mess of tissues in his hand, swiping at his nose as he looked up at Hank, a mess of blue still smeared over his upper lip and partially onto his cheek.

“Hank..I-I don’d feel good. Mby circuits feel like they’re overheating, mby chest biocomponents seem to be acting up, and I can’t stop sndeehh..sndeezing..”,his expression was one of exhaustion or at least as close to it as an artificial being can manage anyways,”I think, perhaps, I’d like to go home..”. He took a tentative step towards Hank, swaying slightly as his LED shone in a bright red hue. His vision glitched and blurred sporadically, causing him to half stumble, just barely catching himself before tumbling into the lieutenant.

“Hey, whoa there! Jesus christ in a manger, Connor!”,he instinctively reached out to catch him, remaining a bit tense just in case he really would need to catch him,”I mean, you sound pretty bad and if you’re really feeling that sick then maybe going home would be a good idea? I really don’t know anything about android anatomy but whatever this malware is, it’s doing a number on you. Should I be worried about it actually..damaging you?”.

At first it seemed that perhaps the bot hadn’t heard him but finally he gave a small nod. If he continued to cough as hard as he was, he might loosen a bicomponent! Or at least it felt like it anyways. “The coughing is the mbost damaging I think. And I might require assistance if I cough something loose..”,he looked up at him once more, swiping at his nose with a thick sniffle.

Knowing Hank’s luck, that ‘might’ was going to end up being a ‘definitely’. But he held his tongue and simply nodded for now, slowly reaching a hand out to rest it on his shoulder,”Well, let’s cross that bridge when we get there, okay? For now though, I think we better get you home before you--”.

Hh’GStChh! ‘GSTChhh! Ngh..”,he couldn’t help but lean against him, a glitched energy alert flashing before his eyes.

ENERGY LEVELS AT 29%. PLEASE CHARGE SOON TO AVOID SHUT DOWN.

“Alright, easy does it. We’ll go slow and steady.”,the silver haired man reassured, allowing Connor to gently grasp him for support as they walked back through the precinct, weaving through the desks and avoiding the looks of the officers and bots they passed,”Almost there, you still with me?”.

Connor gave a tired half nod, focusing more on staying upright than conversation at this point. A part of him was thankful to have such a caring friend but at the same time he hated being so weak and useless. What kind of android couldn’t even complete basic database scanning? Cyberlife would have a field day dismantling him when Hank would no doubt grow too tired of tending to him to keep him around. And then he’d be replaced with an even better model capable of helping out more.

“Hank..you won’t, send mbe back tdo Cyberlife, right?”

“What? Of course not! Why would I do that?”

“Because I’mb of ndo use tdo you right ndow..”

“Well, you see, that’s the funny thing about key words. You gotta take them at face value so while you might be out of commission right now..that doesn’t mean that’ll still be true later. And even if it was true, I’m still not gonna rat you out to them so just chill, alright?”,he rolled his eyes, fishing for his car keys in his back pocket,”Look, just let me do all the worrying for right now and you focus on defragging or whatever it is you gotta do to fix this.”.

Connor looked hopeful, feeling both touched and reassured by his words, content to be fussed over if it meant not having to be sent away.

“Thank you, Hank..I appreciate and v-value.hh..Heh’TScHh!--our friendship.”

“Yeah, yeah say it don't spray it..”.

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Oh my god it's Connor, my favorite android sent by CyberLife

I didn't play the Sad Robots Game, but my partner and I spent like a week watching someone LP it, discussing the story/characters/themes, and grabbing each other to go AAAAA at particularly intense scenes. "Why is Connor weirdly adorable??" I asked once, watching him talk to Hank about dogs.

So: I love Connor, I love his relationship with Hank, and therefore I LOVE THIS OKAY.

2 hours ago, SneezyHolmes said:

Hehh..”,he paused, head tilted back just enough to give any passerby a quick glimpse of the very inner rims of his ever reddening nostrils complete with the faintest of blue tints thanks to the thirium

this is a Very Good image. I wasn't sure how keen I was on the concept of sneezing thirium at the start of things, but I'm solidly on board now...

Quote

Hh’GStCHh! Heh’TSChhh!”,he snapped forward, spraying his desk and computer screen in flecks of glistening blue fluid,”Hihh..Hh’GSTChh!”.

Hank, having been stealing glances every now and then from over his screen, grimaced noticeably but offered a half hearted,“Gesundheit!”.

“Th-Thagksstschh! ‘GsTChh! H-Hehhh’TSCHH!”,each sneeze sent a fine mist of blue drifting down onto his desk and anything unfortunate enough to be caught in the crossfire. He let an exasperated sigh escape his parted lips, thirium dribbling over them and collecting at the bottom of his chin. His hand swiped at the liquid, watching passively as some of it absorbed into the cuff of his suit, temporarily staining the fabric blue.

...partly thanks to stuff like this. This is quality mess right here, and while I'd normally be a bit squicked by it making mouth contact... it's thirium! It's not germs, it's just blue!

Quote

After a few moments, Hank grunted and got to his feet, lazily shoving his hands in his pockets and making his way towards the breakroom,”Ya’ll act like you’ve never seen a sneezin’ android before..jeez.”.

Not pictured: me, snickering at this incredibly Hank piece of dialogue.

Quote

Connor looked hopeful, feeling both touched and reassured by his words, content to be fussed over if it meant not having to be sent away.

“Thank you, Hank..I appreciate and v-value.hh..Heh’TScHh!--our friendship.”

“Yeah, yeah say it don't spray it..”.

:wub: Moments like this are why I adore this relationship. You've captured their dynamic well, I think.

I'm glad you're still actively writing this, and eager to see where it goes!

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3 hours ago, Quell said:

Oh my god it's Connor, my favorite android sent by CyberLife

I didn't play the Sad Robots Game, but my partner and I spent like a week watching someone LP it, discussing the story/characters/themes, and grabbing each other to go AAAAA at particularly intense scenes. "Why is Connor weirdly adorable??" I asked once, watching him talk to Hank about dogs.

So: I love Connor, I love his relationship with Hank, and therefore I LOVE THIS OKAY.

this is a Very Good image. I wasn't sure how keen I was on the concept of sneezing thirium at the start of things, but I'm solidly on board now...

...partly thanks to stuff like this. This is quality mess right here, and while I'd normally be a bit squicked by it making mouth contact... it's thirium! It's not germs, it's just blue!

Not pictured: me, snickering at this incredibly Hank piece of dialogue.

:wub: Moments like this are why I adore this relationship. You've captured their dynamic well, I think.

I'm glad you're still actively writing this, and eager to see where it goes!

Oh my gosh, I'm so happy to have gotten this comment! I'm a huge fan of your writing! :D Also, I'm really glad you like it so far and I hope I can keep doing these two justice! Thanks for reading! ❤️ 

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Oh my god that chapter was adorable as hell. Connor being so worried about being dismantled just because he wasn't useful was so sad (and so in character, poor guy), and Hank's last line made me laugh. Also, neat freak Connor, who always has to look perfect, unable to keep his sneezes from coating him in thirium. Nice. Very nice. 

Poor Connor. I hope they're able to find, like, some kind of black market tech guy who can at least help him out a little (even if we don't want him totally cured >: D), because I feel bad for him. 

Edited by Orionbob
wanted to clarify a word that might have been confusing
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