Vampires don’t sneeze (A Vampire: The Masquerade, Bloodlines fic)

[Light]

This short story is based on one of my favorite computer games of all time.

 

Vampire: The Masquerade, Bloodlines came out in the early 2000s and it still holds up as a cult classic today. If you like vampires I highly, highly recommend it. You can get it on steam but you will need the free unofficial patch to make it run on todays computers. But it is totally worth it as it’s the best vampire game ever made.

 

This story involve two interesting characters you meet in act one.

 

No spoilers in the comments if you have played it please. 

 

Anyway hope you all enjoy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Vampires don’t sneeze!” Theresa yelled as her temper blazed. She normally prided herself on her control and rationality but as usual her sister knew just how to set her off. 

 

“Who says we can’t?” Jennet said in that playful almost pouting voice that had seduced many a human.

 

Theresa hated that voice. She herself always spoke with confidence and proprietary. She suspected Jennet purposely did it around her to infuriate her. 

 

While twins, they could not be more different in personality even if they looked identical.  Theresa was professional and ambitious, constantly seeking to move up in vampire society and hoped to soon rule Santa Monica officially. Once that was secured she could begin working towards higher goals like the city of L.A. as a whole perhaps. 

 

She always wore something professional, tonight a dark business suit and skirt, blond hair neatly up.

 

Jennet on the other hand seemed to have no ambition beyond her next bedroom conquest and seduction. That in and of itself was enough to make Theresa see red. Kindred (vampires) did not engage in....human copulation. Kine (humans) were for advancement through manipulation and to satisfy the need for blood, that was all. Sure they were in the club business and Jennet’s.....habitats helped to bring in more customers but still it was....not proper. 

 

Jennet always wore something meant to entice and seduce. Tonight a low cute white blouse tide to reveal most of her stomach, a very short skirt, and high heels. Dark gothic makeup around her eyes and blond hair up in her usual pig tails.

 

 

 

“Why on earth would you want to sneeze anyway?” Theresa said.

 

“Well I was with this Kine the other night and it turns out they had a fetish they really wanted to try.” Jennet said digging through one of her drawers “We are meeting again tonight and I wanted to see if I can indulge them.”

 

“Why on earth do you insist on sleeping with Kine!” Theresa yelled angrily. Her sisters reputation had spread through Kindred society in L.A. and it had not made her attempts to advance herself any easier. “You know it’s taboo!”

 

“Taboo is just another name for deliciously naughty and fun.” Jennet said grinning “Have you ever drank from a Kine who is in the heights of human pleasure? It’s enough to make your toes curl.”

 

Theresa scoffed. Drinking from a Kine under normal circumstances was quite enjoyable enough in her mind and beyond compare to any human form of bedroom enjoyment.

 

“No, things are taboo for a reason and if you keep......what are you planning to do with that?” Theresa said changing what she was saying as Jennet pulled a ziplock bag with what appeared to be a glove of garlic in it out of the drawer. 

 

“Well” Jennet said “I figure that all those stupid rumors about our kind being repelled by this stuff might have come from somewhere. Maybe we are allergic to it. I hope so. I’ve tried everything else.”

 

Theresa grimmest at the thought of Jennet sniffing pepper or flowers or maybe using a feather to try to make herself sneeze. Why did she always have to be so controlled by her whims? 

 

“I highly doubt that is going to work.” Theresa said.

 

“Well then you get to have one little victory then.” Jennet said mockingly as she opened the bag.

 

With her enhanced senses Theresa could smell the garlic immediately and wrinkled her nose. True it was  it a myth that it could be used to repel Kindred but that did not mean she liked the aroma.

 

Jennet on the other hand grinned and wiggled her nose at the sent. “Oooh, I think this just mah-might work.” she said moving the garlic close to her nose and inhaling.

 

“Jennet this is ridiculous” Theresa said “Wh-why on earth would you wh-want tah-to......geh-get that thing away from me!”

 

Jennet and her damn antics. That thing was going to make Theresa sneeze too at this rate. She had the shadow of a memory of what that felt like from her days before her Embrace but like all memories from her human life, it had been a very long time and they were quite faded.

 

Jennet smiled and let her head ease back slightly as her breath began to hitch. From her face and how she made the hitches sound, one would think something quite scandalous was happening. 

 

“It heh it’s going t-to make me heekrshooow eeekrchoooooo!!!”

 

Jennet sneezed and like with everything else she did it came out sounding quite sexy and somehow seductive, if a sneeze could be seductive that was. Girly, desperate, and with a squeak Jennets sneezes sounded like she was trying to fully enjoy every aspect of them.

 

 

Theresa rolled here eyes in frustration. “Are you finished yet?” she said angrily “Really, must you always insist upon indulging in human enjoyments rather then being satisfied with the pleasure that blood provides?”

 

“You really shouldn’t knock it till you ha-have heeeeshoooooo!! tried it Theresa.” Jennet said.

 

“Like I would eh-ever want t-to  Ehhwhooo!!Ehwhoooo!!! Grrrr! Damn it Jennet put that damn th-thing Ehhwhooooow!!! Put it away!” Theresa yelled as the garlic got to her as well.

 

“M-make heeeeshoooooo me!” Jennet said with a giggle and a sneeze. 

 

Theresa was angry enough to do just that. She and Jennet began to dance around the room as Jennet fought to hold the garlic and Theresa to take it from her. All the while......

 

 

Heeeeshooooo!!

 

Ehhwhoooooo

 

Eeeeshoooooo!! Eeechoooooow!!

 

Ehhwhooooooow!!!!

 

 

Heeeeechooooooo!!!

 

 

Ehhhwhooooooooo!!   Choooooooo!!!

 

 

Theresa and Jennet seemed to alternate sneezes back and forth as they struggled for the garlic, Jennet laughing the entire time. That was until Theresa finally got a hold of it and pitched it across the room. 

 

“Why!?” Jennet moaned poutingly “Why do you always have to get in the way of my fun!?” 

 

Before Theresa could reply, the bathroom door slammed and Jennet was gone. 

 

“Sure, run away and pout!” Theresa said angrily at the door “It’s what your best at.”

 

There was a knock on the main door to their apartment above the club and Theresa took a moment to straighten her skirt and top. As usual Jennet had started this mess at the worst time, while Theresa had been expecting a visitor. A new fledgling vampire she had head was in town. Sent by the prince of L.A. as someone he could easily manipulate to do his bidding no doubt. But Theresa was sure she could manipulate the new comer to her own ends just as well. Jennet has met the fledgling the night before and after some flirtation, enticed them to return tonight. Jennet did have her uses Theresa supposed. If only she could control her urges a bit more she could be an ally rather then an annoyance. 

 

Looking herself over once more, the mirror was no use of course, Theresa walked to the door and opened it.

 

[mysterysneeze]

Wow!  I am really happy seeing one of your stories again! Thank you for taking time showing what you write. I've never heard or played any of this series. It is neat learning something new and I like the way you wrote the sneezes and wrote the characters! I learned about Embrace, and the concept of something supernatural being sneezy is an amazing idea to me. I love how you explored that concept!