"Cabin Fever " (Avengers - Tony Stark) - 2/5?

[Anonymouse]

So strangely enough, my half of the trade is also sort of cabin themed. I have a headcanon that 1. Barton’s wife and family don't exist, 2. HulkWidow never happened nor was it ever considered by anybody and 3. Clint and Natasha have a little lovenest somewhere in (location undisclosed) where they got a lot of snow in the winter and build fires and make tea and cocoa and snuggle and… well, I should stop now. Because this one focuses on Tony, and some shit that goes down because of him. Based on an actual sickness I was experiencing while I wrote this, but with the sneezing amped up to 11. I hope you enjoy it, @SleepingPhlox!

 

‘-’-’-’-’-’

1.

This was their fourth year going to the cabin for the Fourth of July; their first year with Tony and Pepper as their guests. Natasha personally preferred their solo winter jaunts, but begrudgingly indulged Barton in one of his annual guilty pleasures: a cook-out and fireworks to celebrate the holiday, this time with some company. Americans were ridiculous with their monthly celebrations, all requiring food of some kind. At least she got killer kebabs out of the deal, so she couldn't really complain.

The weather reports predicted cooler temperatures than average, but still hot and perfect for a swim in the lake near the cabin. Perhaps a naked swim, if not for the presence of Stark, party of two. Natasha wasn't even sure if she'd mind having Pepper there, but the idea of Tony seeing her nude made her skin crawl.

“What’re you thinking about?”

Natasha glanced at Barton, who had finally finished backing into a parking spot. He was smiling at her like he already knew the answer, but wanted to hear her say it.

“Nothing,” she said abruptly. “I was just wondering why one of the most bad-ass pilots I know drives stick shift like a grandpa.”

“Really? ‘cause you have this smile on your face like…” He trailed off, unable to find the word he needed.

Natasha promptly assumed a neutral expression. “I don't smile,” she said. “It's just an illusion.”

Looking genuinely uneasy, Clint turned the off the car and tossed her the keys. “Hold onto that, or I'll lose it before we board the plane.”

Clint pushed his aviators up over his hair, squinting into the glare of the sun as he looked towards the private airport. Natasha shielded her eyes from the brightness and reached into the back seat to grab her bag. It was the only one she brought; she preferred to pack light, especially since the cabin was already stocked with all the necessities, including a team of armed security personnel. Even she had to admit, traveling with Stark had its perks.

Her phone buzzed with an incoming text message while she was hoisting the bag over her shoulder. They were late, thanks to Clint’s rigid adherence to the speed limit, so she suspected it was either Tony or Pepper asking her where they were.

Sure enough, she had a new text message from Pepper Potts:

 

We’re here, but no rush.

 

“She said no rush.”

Clint remained in his seat, both hands on the wheel. “Does that mean we have time to get coffee?”

Natasha rolled her eyes, shoving her bag at him and reaching back to grab his. “Now you're offering? But seriously, we're late enough. I'm sure Tony has some fancy espresso machine on his private jet.”

“But I have a free beverage coupon,” he said, looking genuinely disappointed. And when she didn't budge, he sweetened the deal. “I’ll let you pick the flavor.”

She scoffed and dropped her gaze to her phone as it lit up with a pair of new messages.

 

If it's not too inconvenient, could you get us some coffees please? Someone needs his caffeine.

Tony likes his black. Light and sweet for me.

 

"You're in luck,” she said, raising her eyebrows in surprise at the timing. “They asked us to pick up coffee.”

Clint gave her a smug grin, then frowned as she got out of the car. “But I thought-"

“I'm driving,” she said, walking around to the driver’s side door and waiting patiently as he slithered out, crumbs from his Pop-Tart falling onto the pavement. “неря́ха.*”

She tossed their bags into the back seat and hopped into the chair. Once Clint was situated, she gunned it out of the deserted lot.

---

In reality Tony wasn't grumpy, or tired; in fact, he woke up frisky, but late, which made for a very frustrating situation… until Pepper took it upon herself to take care of things on the floor of the kitchen, while the coffee brewed and the toast burned. They continued to flirt heavily on the ride over, sneaking caresses across the center console, kale and almond milk breakfast smoothies untouched. By the time they arrived at the private airfield, Tony suggested they call the whole thing off and go park in the woods somewhere for round two.

“Don't get greedy,” Pepper warned, pushing against the warmth of his chest as he came in for another kiss. “We have a whole weekend ahead of us.”

“Yeah, I suppose,” he said, backing down and folding his arms. “We won't be getting a lot of privacy, though.”

“Trust me, they'll be wanting their own privacy,” she said. “The bedrooms are as far apart as they can be. It'll be like we're alone.”

“If we had this little sleepover at our place, they could have their own floor.”

“That may be true,” said Pepper, “but we can't see the stars at our place.”

For a moment Tony looked at her so tenderly she almost regretted declining his offer to retreat to the woods for some 1950s style lovemaking in the back of his car. Then he sighed very softly and said “You're the only star I ever want to see.”

And with that he turned around to fiddle with the coffee maker on the counter, leaving her craving more of him. Pepper bit her lip, weighing the potential pros and cons of the decision she was about to make. She sent a series of text messages to Natasha, hoping to buy herself some time and solidify her commitment to indulging her body's needs.  Then she dropped her phone onto the table and ran over to Tony, throwing her arms around him. He felt so warm, warmer than usual, much warmer than he felt this morning. Tony wrapped his arms around her, wincing so hard from the simple movement that she could feel it in his body. When she looked up he was back to looking stoic, then confused, as she stared at him longer than he considered polite or necessary.

“Is something wrong?” he asked, separating from her incrementally. “You're putting out some confusing vibes today.”

“No, this is… good, I'm just…” Pepper took his arm reassuringly, but then frowned as he sniffled. It was an innocuous enough action on its own, for a guy who was known to be sniffly on occasion, but paired with the unusually heightened body heat and the glassiness she was just now seeing in his eyes, it was a cause for concern.

“Are you feeling okay?” she asked, reaching up to brush her fingers across his forehead and gently push some loose strands of hair back into place. She hoped the gesture would be less intimidating than feeling his forehead outright, but he still shrunk away from the contact.

“I'm fine, just a little stiff,” he said, stretching his back out for added effect. “Probably from this morning… I'm getting old, Pep; it's natural. No cause for alarm.”

Pepper was always wary about his health, especially after he lied by omission about the arc reactor slowly poisoning him to death. To his credit, Tony changed a lot since those days, but some things stayed the same; she was concerned that the Tony that snuck around behind their backs, telling half-truths to keep his secret battles a secret instead of reaching out to his friends for help, was still in there, playing a big part in all of this. But God, when he looked at her like that, she had a hard time believing that he was anything but pure and honest.

“So are we... doing this, or should I go take a cold shower?” he asked. “I'm fine either way, just… let me know.”

Pepper thought it over another moment, ultimately deciding there was no harm in giving her boyfriend a little TLC before they embarked in their trip. Maybe she was just imagining things; his eyes did look better now in the natural light of the sun, and now that she thought about it, his skin and dark clothing were probably just warm from the sun. Soon she forgot what she was even worried about.

They were finished and dressed by the time Clint and Natasha arrived with the coffee and the cigarettes they didn't ask for, but took anyway. Although Tony was back to his annoyingly energetic self, Pepper couldn't help but notice him paying more attention to his nose than usual, touching and rubbing it at random, or sniffling and crinkling it up like it was bothering him. Bringing it up again would only drive him into a deeper state of denial, so Pepper simply filed away this evidence, keeping a close eye on him for more until she could build a strong enough case.

TBC...
 

*”Slob.”

Edited August 13, 2017 by AnonyMouse

[SleepingPhlox]

Okayokayokay I have so many things I love about this.  I don't know where to start.  I also can't quote very effectively on my phone so bear with me.

Well first of all as for your headcanon, I can get on board with that.  Good god the Clint's family and HulkWidow crap was sooo awful.  So awful.

Now.  Omg slow burn sickfic? Slow burn sickfic!  I love this type of fic.  I love seeing an illness progress from the first few sniffles.   And it is just the best when people notice little things about the sickie being off...but maybe it's nothing...but maybe they should worry.   That is one of my favourite things.

Also "a guy who was known to be sniffle on occasion"...Lordy, that is yummy.  

This is setting such a wonderful scene, I am so intrigued to see what happens next!

[Elyze]

Great start to the story! I look forward to reading the following parts already! Stark is one of my favorites, both the looks and the personality

[webmeistro]

That's not just headcanon. HulkWidow is a product of the Cinematic Universe; in comics, Clint and 'Tasha have had an on-and-off thing for many years.

[Anonymouse]

1 hour ago, webmeistro said:

That's not just headcanon. HulkWidow is a product of the Cinematic Universe; in comics, Clint and 'Tasha have had an on-and-off thing for many years.

In this, they're just straight "on." I'm most familiar with the MCU so that's the perspective from which I write.

[webmeistro]

4 hours ago, AnonyMouse said:

In this, they're just straight "on." I'm most familiar with the MCU so that's the perspective from which I write.

But... but... then who will give Hulk a 'lullaby'? Steve?

 

 

 

 

(kidding!!)

[Anonymouse]

Thanks, hellyzelle! He really is a great character.

SleepingPhlox - I am so glad you're enjoying it so far! I'm wondering why it took me this long to really sit down and write some Stark goodness. It's really fun, even if it's a bit of a challenge getting his snarkiness down in words. I hope I'm doing him justice.

And I'm glad you like gradual cold development because there's only a handful of sneezes in this part - I may have gotten carried away with the whole “low and slow” idea, but I really want this thing to creep up and then SLAM him. And it will, especially after his little jaunt at the end there. So stay tuned.

‘-’-’-’-’-’

2.

Tony loved chit chat. As a man with lot of interesting things to say and a below-average level of impulse control, he enjoyed initiating conversations. Like most things, chit chat was especially fun when everyone was drunk. What was not fun was being the only person in the room without a buzz, which he was, right now, because the last thing he wanted was scotch when his throat felt like he swallowed a dry loofah. He had a gently throbbing body ache, a fullness in his chest and yearning for something with enough acetaminophen to put the Hulk into a coma. Tony had difficulty tolerating even the slightest inkling of physical discomfort, so whenever possible, he chose to burn out the offending pain receptors with chemicals instead.

He kept up just enough chatter to evade suspicion, even as his voice became strained and somewhat hoarse. Tony took a tiny sip of his scotch and swished it around his mouth before swallowing; he imagining the germs of whatever was breaking past his immune defenses dying in the flood. The burn of whiskey in his throat almost made him cough, but he wouldn't allow his body the satisfaction. Instead he handed his drink to Pepper before she could interrogate him and excused himself from the room.

As soon as he made it to the private bathroom he turned on the tap. The pressure was always so low on the plane, the running water barely covered the sound his coughing jag. When he was finished, he looked at himself in the mirror and winced before opening the medicine cabinet, just to see what he had. Toothpaste, floss picks, a roll of Tums, Aspirin, and Advil. After some consideration he closed the cabinet and really studied his reflection. Tony thought he looked like he'd washed up on a deserted island after a plane wreck; it was an unnerving comparison, given the fact that he was presently flying. Shaking his head like a dog derailed the “what if” train of his anxiety, but left him reeling with dizziness. He grabbed the sink with one hand and used the other to cup some water to his lips, sputtering when someone knocked at the bathroom door.

“Occupied,” he said, turning off the sink. “And I think you know that.”

“Are you okay in there?”

Pepper was hovering; she only did that when she knew something was awry. It was unsettling, like that cat that predicted nursing home deaths. Tony took some paper towels and dabbed his forehead, trying to mop away the evidence of his elevated temperature. "I’ll be out in a sec,” he replied, folding the towels in half. “Just… taking a leak. You know how it goes. Honestly, you standing right there is making it a bit difficult to, uh… do… so…”

The volume of his reply dropped to a soft mutter towards the end; he could hear her walking away halfway through, but continued on anyway, because sometimes he truly did enjoy the sound of his own voice. This time it actually caused the most subtle of vibrations in his head, a faint quivering sensation along the inner walls of his nose. His sinuses were starting to feel heavy and full, and every so often his breath snagged on the congestion. It was getting harder to deny the fact that he was coming down with something...

Tony brought the folded towels to his nose and slowly rubbed them against his nostrils. He didn't realize how itchy they were until now; it felt good to massage them against the rough, textured paper. The stimulation brought blood flooding to the area, heightening the sense of irritation that plagued him there. It built and built until his nostrils were red and flaring, no longer satisfied with the blissful touch of the towels. He was going to sneeze and there was nothing he could do to stop it; all he could do was make sure it was quiet enough so the others wouldn't hear.

“kTShh! Hihh’ktschh!”

He caught his nose in the tightly folded towel, tongue pressed hard against the roof of his mouth. A small amount of spray was released from between his clenched teeth; he could feel it settling along his arms, and found some sprinkled across the mirror when he opened his eyes again. There were actual tears in his eyes when he met his own gaze once more, and his nose felt just as itchy as before.

“Fuck this,” he muttered, his voice barely a whisper.

And then he sneezed again, the sound pinched in the grip of the paper towels.

---

Pepper kept glancing at the door, her concern more than obvious to the trained spies keeping her company. They were having a lively discussion about the best way to prepare a kitchen stock, but now Tony was now ruining it by way of his absence. It was funny and irritating, how he managed to usurp their attention without even being there.

“He’s acting weird, huh?” Natasha prompted, nodding towards the door when Pepper turned to look at her.

“He was fine this morning,” she said, before scoffing. “More than fine.”

“Maybe he's afraid of heights?” Clint suggested. “Has anyone ever considered that before?”

Natasha shook her head, clearly not amused by the joke. “Something's up, and if I know Stark, we’re going to have to pry it out of him with the jaws of life.”

“Well, wait til the guy is out of the bathroom before you start prying,” Clint said, switching to autopilot and standing up to stretch his back.

“He's just in there running the sink,” Pepper sighed. “He's probably-"

The plane shook suddenly, a loud BANG! interrupting their conversation. Natasha felt her glass slip from her fingers and shatter on the floor, splashing her legs with vodka. She reached out to steady Pepper as the redhead lost her footing and staggered towards her.

“What the hell was that?” Barton asked, loosening his grip on the back of his chair as the plane leveled out again.

He dropped himself in front of the controls and examined their vitals. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Natasha scanned the security monitor, but the plane appeared undamaged and unfollowed, with nothing around them but blue sky and a couple of security drones that were reporting no issues. It didn't make any sense.

“What the hell was that?” Stark echoed behind them, having finally emerged from the bathroom.

“Not sure, but you might want to get out there and check,” Natasha said, keeping her back to him as she continued to scan the security feed. “Everything looks fine... Airspace is clear. I can't imagine something making such an impact without leaving a trace, though.”

One of the Iron Man suits stood ready by the entrance of the plane; the docking station quickly became a standard feature of his private jets. Natasha glanced at it before turning to look at Tony. He was gazing towards the suit, but his dark eyes were so unfocused she wondered if he was seeing anything at all. He looked like a hot, failing computer, smoking and overloaded with data. Natasha exchanged an uneasy glance with Pepper, understanding the source of her concerns as she witnessed them for herself.

“Stark, you with us?” she asked sharply. 

He breathed deeply through his nose as if coming back to life after a period of non-existence. “I'm here,” he assured them, looking more present. 

“Great,” she said. “Now get out there. Be quick... and be careful.”

Pepper intercepted Tony before he could make it to the suit. Even as Natasha slipped on her earpiece and fixed her attention on the screen, she found herself passively eavesdropping on the pair. It was second nature for her to listen to people's conversations, an ingrained skill that she never was able to turn off, even when she wanted to.

“Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn't I be?”

“I don't know… you seem…”

“... fine, would be the word you're looking for. I'm fine, Pep. Now let me make sure there's not a gremlin on the wing. I'll just be a minute.”

A small box appeared on the security screen once he powered up; it gave those onboard the plane a firsthand view from the Iron Man suit. The current image was of them - Barton in the pilot seat, Natasha standing by the security module, and Pepper out of frame except for an elbow. “We're still clear,” said Clint. “Maybe we just hit a really big bird?”

“I'll check for feathers,” Tony said.

His voice was muffled under layers of metal, but it came through the earpiece as clear as day. The sound quality was so good Natasha could detect a blunted quality to his voice when he spoke. Before she could stop to reconsider sending him outside on his own, he was entering the first of two hatches. The doors closed and Natasha looked at Pepper, who was watching the Iron Man stream with her fingertips pressed to her lips and a stern look on her face. Natasha wondered if the other woman was irritated with her for bossing her boyfriend off the plane. The fact that Tony allowed himself to be ordered around at all and without raising opposition was a huge sign that something was off with him.

“Tell him not to do anything stupid,” was all she said.

“Roger that,” Tony said, before Natasha could relay the message. “As always, I appreciate the vote of confidence, darling.”

“These are sensitive,” Natasha observed.

“I only deal in the best tehh-h’KSHtt!--technologies, Romanoff, you should know that by now.”

If not for the sound, the sneeze would have likely passed by Natasha unnoticed. Stark kept himself relatively still as he hovered alongside the plane with practiced precision; the camera shook just slightly as the sneeze struck mid-sentence. Natasha glanced back at Pepper again and mimed a silent sneeze before pointing at her ear. The other woman scowled and shook her head.

“Are those superior technologies picking up anything unusual?” she asked, choosing not to comment on the sneeze. 

“Besides a bit of a sarcastic tone? No, nothing.” He paused, sniffling into the mic. “But I'm going to do a little scouting ahead, just to be on the safe side.”

“I think the safest course of action would be to stick together,” Natasha started, but soon his Spotify playlist was making it impossible to talk. “Rude.”

She popped out her earpiece so Led Zeppelin’s “When the Levee Breaks” wouldn't break her eardrum, placing it on the panel with a frustrated sigh.

“Where's he going?” Pepper asked, sounding more annoyed than concerned as Stark propelled himself ahead of the plane.

“Hell if I know," Natasha shrugged.

Iron Man looked like a tiny action figure in the distance. His movements around the sky were more suggestive of a joy ride than a scouting mission, but Natasha was done entertaining him for now. “I'm doing an internal sweep of the plane,” she said. “Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid.”

“Too late,” Clint said dryly.

Hearing the music coming from the earpiece, he picked it up and situated it in his better ear, quietly bobbing along to the classics until Tony decided to return.

Edited August 18, 2017 by AnonyMouse
Stuff and thangs

[Elyze]

2nd part was equally good! And really, some of Tony's remarks just made me laugh. It's a special sort of humor which I think you nailed! 

[SleepingPhlox]

I don't even know where to begin with this.  Okay, my favourite stories are heavy on the plot with some sneezing and suffering thrown in.  And this is perfect on that front.  I so badly want to know what is happening and what is going to happen next and what Tony is up to.  I'm hooked.

And then the slow and gradual appearance of his misery and the gradual peeling away of his denial is so perfect and so exquisitely described. Seriously some of the descriptions are so lovely I have to pause and read them again to let them properly sink in.  I love stubborn denial Tony and I love the silly ways he tries to hide here like going into the bathroom and running the sink and thinking he us totally getting away with it.

And oh yes: sneezing mid sentence? Sneezing in the suit?  Oh yes please!  

And I am loving the characterisations and interactions.  It is just so so so good.

[AngelEyes]

This is great. You've got their interactions down wonderfully. And you've totally got Tony's snarkiness in there! Love it!

[Leafeon78]

Very good story Excellent with the characters and the denial.  

[Arc Reactor]

I absolutely love this story! I can't wait to see what happens next and I am so ready for the feels when he gets hit hard by his cold. 

*patiently waits for an update*