Through my Window (M, 13 Reasons Why)

[Skylacticon]

Yikes, it's been a while since I posted on here.  This is just a little piece of whatsoever I wrote after finishing the series (I know, it's not too realistic but bear with me), centred around these two during the time before the tapes were made. Not quite the otp, I know, but the concept must've hit me like a brick. Whoops.

Through My Window

Tap-tap. 

Fucking hell, what now?

Tap-tap.

I roll over cautiously, my eyes drifting over to my window. Sure enough, he was there. On my roof at 1am on a Tuesday night - seriously, Tuesday? I sigh, my phone slipping out of my hand onto my pillow. My bare feet hit the floor without a sound, as I made my way over to open the latch. And I'm greeted by the bitter cold of the autumn season.

"Justin?" The moment I see him, I can tell something's not right. Only I can't seem to form the words to inquire. "How... Wh-"
"Jess," he swallows. "I'm sorry." His voice sounds damp, hoarse. "I can't stay at my place. Can I come in?"

Shit. I instinctively turn around to look at my door, then back at him. "Yeah. C'mon."

Quietly and carefully, he climbs over the window sill. I notice he only has his ratty Liberty High sweatshirt on, complimented by last year's jeans. God, was he... shivering? I step over and shut the window to keep the chilling breeze from coming in. Justin sits on the edge of my bed, his arms folded tightly across his chest. His face is cold to the touch. I switch on my lamp.

"Jesus, baby. You okay?" I murmur, wrapping my quilt around me like a cape, and over him as well. He puts a cold hand over mine. Then he turns for a brief moment and coughs, shaking his entire frame.

He sniffles and shakes his head. "They turned off our power." Justin whispers. Around his eyes has a red tinge to them, and so does his nose. He's constantly touching it, sniffling like no tomorrow.

I slip out of the warm cocoon, and retrieve the tissue box from my desk. "Blow your nose before you drown." I say, standing in front of him. He looks up. Then after a brief pause, takes it.

"*sniff* ....thanks, Jess..."

I sit in my computer chair, studying my picture frames on the walls as Justin tries to compose himself. Then he sniffles and swipes at his eyes with his sleeve. 

"Shit... They turned off your heat?" 
He nods, his Adam's apple bobbing with a swallow. His eyes dart anywhere that isn't remotely near mine, pulling my comforter closer around his shoulders. "My mom's boyfriend is being a dick. I was *cough, cough* trying to look for some Advil or something... My head, it hurts like a bitch... *cough, cough*"

"Shhhh...." I squeeze him not too tightly, remembering for fuck's sake that he'll be dead if he's caught here without permission.

"Hey." I run my hand through his hair, resting it on his cheek. "Gotta keep quiet, okay? I'll see what I can do."

He nods solemnly. I lean in to give him a kiss on the forehead - god, it's warm. 

When I get back, I see Justin over on the other side of the room. The way his frame towers over some of my pictures reminds me how short I am compared to him - and I bite back a smile. 

"Girls' soccer?" He grins, motioning to one of my trophies on the dresser. I smirk and set the mug of tea down on my vanity.

"I had to have told you at least one story about that old team."
"Yeah, well..." He paces toward me. Suddenly he stops. A fist flies to his face, a weak attempt to stop an upcoming- "Uh'TNSCHh!-uh..." He sniffles. "I can imagine, Jess."

His eyes still look watery in the dull light, and he's still sniffling. His gaze finally connects with mine. Something about him tonight is so... child-like. Then he smiles and we laugh. I shake my head and crack open the bottle of Buckley's.

"Was the total highlight of my fourth grade career... Alright, right now I'm giving you two teaspoons of this medicine."

"Wait, what?"

"Baby, come on, you're sick."

"No... Huh'NSCHhtt!-mnhh..." He winces, running a weary hand over his face.

The corners of my lips turn upward in sympathy. "You're sneezing now."

"Dno I'b dot...." A tiny grin can be seen before he turns his head away to cough. Whiny, snotty Justin in my room at one in the morning... Being stubborn, as usual. What else could I ask for, this season? I sigh and look down at the silver utensil, then back up at him.

"Please?" I ask in a higher pitch, earning another glance backward at me. His nostrils twitch with another sniffle, and he presses his fingers against it like he has to sneeze again. Aaand false alarm.

"...Fine." He breathes, sitting on my bed. Hallelujah. I pour him one teaspoon, the oozing liquid a dark violet that smelled bitterly of menthol.

"Ugh, that looks disgustig. *sniff!*" I giggle.

"C'mon." I lift the spoon in front of him, and he turns his chin away like a stubborn toddler. "Hey. Justin." He looks at me with pleading eyes, then quickly lowers his gaze. "C'mon." I roll my eyes. "Say 'ahh'..." He at least cracks a smile.

Then, opening his mouth, says "Ahh." Touchdown.

The minute it goes in, Justin's face contorts in disgust. With efforts, he manages to get it down. "Ugh!" I laugh out loud- and catch myself, muffling it with my palm. He pulls the hem of his shirt over his mouth to muffle a few coughs. "Fuck." He sticks his tongue out, making faces.

I sigh, wiping my eyes from laughing so hard. "Good boy. That was round one."

"'old on... Uh'GTNSCHh!!-uhh, fuck be..." He snatches a tissue and blows his nose. "That was roud ode?"

"Yup. One to go."

"Ughh... Ode sec... Hh'TNxxGT!-nuhhh...." He stifles painfully, from the look of it. Then he gasps in another breath and lets out a harsher, failed stifle. "Huh'GXxTCHh'u... Ugh..."

"Gross." I joke.

"Shush." He mutters, giving a slightly honking blow.

"You mean you shush," I tap him on the nose playfully. "If my dad hears you sneezing we're both gonna get caught."

"We're dot." He says stuffily and rubs harshly at his already reddened nose. "*sniff* Okay, I'b ready."

Carefully, I ready another teaspoon of syrup and hold it in front of Justin.

"WaitI'bdot-" I roll my eyes. "Huh'Nnxggk!-huhh, shit." He blinks, flickering his eyes back on the teaspoon. "Sorry." He sniffles wetly.

"Come on. My arms are turning to stone." I tease. Finally, he swallows the next dose, his eyes scrunching in disgust.

"Ughh!" He whispers dramatically, his fingers brushing his lips. I stand and ruffle his hair, a bit relieved to hear him laugh.

"There." I chuckle. "Way to go." I tuck the medicine onto my shelf out of sight, where my parents won't see it.

I feel his arms wrap around me from behind, his slender jaw resting on my shoulder. "Thanks, baby." I turn and kiss him.

"Your welcome. Now, tea."

"Tea?"

"Yup. You haven't touched it. It's right there." I nod toward my dresser.

"Oh.... It's for me?"

I smirk. "Who else? C'mon. It'll take take bad taste away.

He gives me a wary glance, and takes a sip. "I like chai." Then a second after inhaling the steam, raises his fist again. "Nxxgk!-mnhh..."

"Bless you." I say.

"*sniff!* Thanks."

I shrug, plopping down on the bed. "It's all we had."

"Well, I like it." He takes a seat next to me, warming both of his hands against the mug. I run my fingers through his golden hair, like I've done at least a thousand times. I turn his face so I can look in his eyes. Blue, like a clear ocean... Looking so frail and vulnerable right now. The mug hits my desk with a hollow clink. 

"Baby..." He breathes. I cradle his jaw beneath my fingers, as he leans down onto the bed. "Baby." He turns his head away before I can kiss him.

"Hmm?" I look at him, trying to suppress my disappointment.

"I..." He rests his head on my pillow, turning to look into my eyes. "I just. Don't want you to get sick."
I breathe out. Then grin a little.

"Funny, little boy. Drops by my window in the middle of a minus twenty wind chill, trying not to get me sick."

"Jessica."

"I know." I tuck my head into his chest, his arm wrapping around me. He kisses the top of my head and exhales deeply, his hands now warm against my skin.

"I love you, baby."

"I love you too."

---

"Justin." I jiggle his arm, earning a soft groan. "Justin." He raises his head off the desk and yawns.

"Hmm?" He rubs his eyes. "What?"

I suppress a laugh. "You slept through third period." He sighs. "Lucky you, I managed to stop ultimate pen Jenga from happening on your head."

"I slept through Razdean's?" Justin grunts, casting a short glance backward. I grin and sigh at his false concern.

"'Sup Aurora?" Marcus teases.

"Shut up, man." 

I start packing up my notebook, tucking my worksheets into my folder. Still, I feel really shitty that my boyfriend isn't entitled to care in his own house. What I know is that going back will be a touchy event, based on how he feels. I silently note that later, I'll have to come up with a plan.

"Hnn'Mmnsch!" Justin muffles into his crossed arms, so quiet under the classroom chatter that no one notices. Almost no one.

When he raises his head, his eyes looks tired and it looks like his headache is back. He coughs a little into his fist. Cursing myself a little, I lean close to him.

"Hey."

He looks at me in the corner of his eye and chuckles softly. "Hey."

"Feel like ditching...?" I murmur, swaying playfully. I see his true state coming through as he glances upward at the clock. He swallows, and nods.

"'Kay." I kiss him on the cheek. "C'mon." 

Justin wraps his arms around himself as we drift down the hall. He's awfully quiet today - it figures. The hall echoes with our footsteps, a lonely sound that can only go two kinds of directions. This time I hope it's in the good direction. Justin raises the crook of his arm to cough. The sound projects across the empty walls, capped with the sound of his sniffling.

"You okay?"

He nods immediately, clearing his throat for good measure. 

"Bullshit." I smirk. I turn toward the exit. 

"Hey." He stops in his tracks.

"Wh... Where are we going?"

"Home. My parents aren't coming back for a few hours." He grins sheepishly, trailing his gaze along the lockers. The hue looks so depressing in the natural shaded light. Justin touches my hair, quietly looking down with the same glassy eyes as the moment he came in my window last night.

"Okay." He whispers.

"Okay?" A smile flashes on my lips.

"Okay."

I realize then that I don't know what I'll do when we get back - definitely get Justin to lie down, deal with his whining, maybe sing him a lullaby... Stop, I think, looking away to hide a smile. 

"Hhp'NxXGkt!-ehh... *sniff*" he paws at his nose, sniffling and looking at least eight years old. 

"You don't have to do that all the time."

"Hm? *sniff!*"

I pull out a packet of travel tissues from the glove compartment and hold one out to him. "Here. Doesn't that hurt, Justin?"

"I.... Hhhh..." He's blinking submissively, turning to face the front like it hides him any better. His nose twitches rebelliously. Then with squinted eyes, grabs the tissue from my hand and raises it. "Hh'RRrischhu!"

"Bless you." 

"HNn'Ischh!" His shoulders shake with the force of the outbursts. At least it doesn't sound as painful as when he stifles.

"Bless you!"

He groans, pinching his nose with the soft tissue. "Mnhh..." When he lowers his hands, his nostrils are redder and his blue eyes are waterier than before. He wipes at them roughly with his jacket sleeve. "'Mb sorry..." He croaks, looking miserable.

"Hey, don't be sorry." I say, brushing at a few strands of hair that have been shaken loose. His forehead is still very warm. I lean in and kiss him. "We'll be home soon, okay?"

His eyes stay locked downward, the silence occupied by weak sniffles and coughs as I pull out of the school parking lot. "B'head hurts..."

"I know, baby..."

"Jess?"

"Yeah, Justin?"

An odd silence hangs for a few seconds. "Thank you." He mumbles, before diving into a short fit of coughing. My heart sinks a little. At home, he has no one to take care of him. I even bet he's been yelled at for making a sound, and that's why he's been keeping an awful habit of stifling all the time. I wish I could make things better for him.
But for now, I can do is say: "Aww, Justin..." I turn into my street, then pat his knee. "Always."

 

[VividBubbles!]

This was absolutely lovely! 13 Reasons Why was an amazing and thoughtful show that I adored and Justin was one of the characters that I legitimately felt bad for. Not to mention, the actor who plays him, Brandon Flynn, is adorable. Wonderful story and I hope to read more from you in the future!

[sickprincess]

Your writing is incredible!! I'd love to read more of your stuff, especially more 13 Reasons Why. Maybe some Clay and Hannah care taking??