First Date (Swan Queen, OUAT) (F/F)

[PropertyofCora]

I was looking through my files this evening, and I came across this beginning to a story.  Based on my notes at the top of it, I seem to have intended it at some point in time for @TheGreatCatsby though I cannot recall at the moment (It is 5AM so I'm bound to forget things), why I never finished or posted it.  So I decided to finish the first section and post it for you all now.  If there's enough interest, I'll continue it, as I seem to have left a great deal of it already planned out.  

For those unfamiliar with the show and pairing of Emma Swan and Regina Mills, all you'll need to really know for this fic is that Regina, formerly the Evil Queen that cursed a bunch of fairy tale characters to this land in a town called Storybrooke, adopted her son Henry, who was born to Emma Swan, who happens to be the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming.  A lot has happened but they have all grown very close by this point in time.  This is placed really at any time after Snow and Charming had baby Neal, but not much of the plot is expected to be relevant.  If any other names come up I'll try to remember to explain them briefly first.

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PART 1 (?):

Emma knew she needed to slow down on the wine, for she was beginning to get a little fuzzy, and she wanted to remember every moment of this evening with as much clarity as she could.  At the same time, she was especially nervous, taking bets against herself for how long she would manage to make it through the evening before she did something horribly embarrassing to mess it up. 

She took another long gulp of wine and looked across the table at Regina, who merely raised a questioning eyebrow at her and said nothing of the speed with which Emma was emptying her wine glass.

They had shared dinners many times before, but nothing like this time.  Before, things had been casual, and Emma never needed to worry about messing up because she knew Regina already saw her as a goof and expected nothing less.  Now, however, she felt like she had to make everything perfect.

Now, she was on an actual, real life date with Regina freaking Mills.  She definitely could not risk messing that up and putting Regina off before anything even happened.

How she had ended up on this date exactly was still a bit of a mystery, even to Emma.  One second they had been bickering about something pointless over lunch in Regina’s office as usual, both enjoying the odd lack of trouble in the town for once, and the next second Emma was shutting Regina up with her lips.

It had led to an awkward silence, more awkward avoidance, some awkward pleading, and finally a very awkward conversation.

Emma was determined for their first real date to break the chain of awkward reactions.

“So,” she began, setting her wine glass down and fumbling with her hands under the table like some nervous school girl, “how was your salmon?”

Regina sighed and shot her another look.

“Emma, have I done something to make you suddenly terrified of me?  Have I threatened you and forgotten it?  Or what’s this all about?”

Emma gulped and looked down.  “Sorry,” she mumbled.  “You did nothing. I just really don’t want to be responsible for ruining our first date.  I know doing it this way was important to you.”

“Emma, listen to me.”  Regina reached her hands across the table, signaling for Emma to join her halfway, which she did with only a minor amount of trembling.  “I know you.  I’m not sitting here looking for some perfect first impression, because I already know exactly who it is I’m getting into this with, okay?  You’re Emma.  You’re an idiot sometimes, but I’m still here despite knowing that, so I think it’s safe to assume I’m smitten enough for you to be here as yourself.”

She squeezed her hands around Emma’s and smiled in that soft, warm way that was only reserved for a small selection of people. 

Like Henry, a kitten they had seen on the street last week, and now apparently Emma as well.

“Sorry,” she repeated.  “I don’t know why I’m being like this.  You’re right, you definitely have had plenty of time to realize what you’re getting into.  But I’m glad you want to anyways.”

Emma looked down at their hands, savoring the warmth of Regina’s around her own.  They were soft, fit for a Queen and silky against Emma’s own overworked and rough pair.  She was puzzled when Regina didn’t immediately respond and instead began to pull one of her hands away.

“Regina?”

But Regina still failed to answer, and when Emma looked up, she realized why.  One hand that had escaped their clasped pile on the table was hovering a few inches in front of her face.  Her lips were parted, breath quickly entering and escaping with periodic hitches, her eyelids began to flutter closed, and her nose crinkled up in the most adorable way. 

She remained that way for a moment, constant hitches getting closer together, until Regina looked to be on the edge of a very irritating explosion.  After what felt like an eternity of watching in anticipation, Regina erupted forward with a harsh Huhh  huRESHoo! into her cupped palm. 

“Bless you,” Emma squeaked out, watching as the older woman scrunched her nose like she was waiting for more.

She couldn’t exactly put her finger on it, but there was something about Regina’s sneeze that made her feel strange.  Emma was certain this had been the first time Regina had ever sneezed in front of her.  She wasn’t entirely sure what it meant that she had noticed that, but it felt pressing, like she should be sure to store it away in her memory.

The rest of dinner went by without a hitch, the conversation flowing much more naturally after their little talk.  The comfort she’d grown used to feeling when near Regina was kicking back into place, all fear that the evening might end in disaster slowly fading to the back of Emma’s mind.  She was so successful, in fact, that she even managed to convince Regina to order dessert.

They were sharing a piece of strawberry cheesecake when it happened again.

“I was watching Neal for my parents last night, and he did the cutest weird little baby thing.  I think it was an attempt at talking, but I can’t be sure.  Remember what Henry was like at that stage?”

While they had tried avoiding discussing Henry the entire meal, as he was far too safe a topic, the wine getting to Emma’s mind was beginning to take her from thought to thought.  Like now, she was thinking about how Regina wasn’t answering her, but that was all right, because Regina looked very pretty in the restaurant’s candlelight, and would probably look even prettier if she only would move her hand away from her face.

“ReSHHoo! Huh… hurreehh… HuRESHiew!” Regina sneezed into a cupped palm, sniffling even as she held it in place.

Emma’s brain clicked back into place as she realized what had happened, and she quickly rooted around in her purse for the travel pack of tissues she kept.  Cell phone… hair brush… Granny’s to-go menu… and tissues.  She pulled them out and handed the whole pack over eagerly to a grateful Regina.

“Bless you,” Emma finally said, still somewhat shocked.  She’d gone from never seeing Regina sneeze to now having witnessed it three times in one evening.  It had to be some kind of record.  And even now, Regina was taking out one of the tissues to blow her nose, and at the end she sneezed a fourth, wet, “Shiew!”  just before replacing the used tissue with a second one.

Emma blinked and tried to keep my mouth from gaping open.  “Bless you, again.”

Regina sighed and finally lowered the tissue from her face, where Emma could now see her nose was beginning to turn just the slightest shade of red.  She squinted her eyes at Regina’s nose, which also seemed to be trembling, just a bit, as if waiting for another sneeze to burst forth from itchy confinement.

“Are you feeling all right?”  Emma asked without taking her eyes off Regina’s nose, which was definitely twitching.

“I’m fine.” Regina croaked, followed by a blushing flush cascading across her cheeks and a polite clearing of her throat.  “Thank you for your concern, but there is nothing to be concerned about.”

Emma snorted.  “Right.  You just happen to go years without ever sneezing, then sneeze four times in one night.”

Regina raised a challenging eyebrow.  “What?”

Emma chose to ignore answering to the fact that she had clearly been paying way too much attention to something as menial as Regina’s sneezes, which really seemed rather fascinating to her, not that she would admit it out loud.  Instead, she narrowed her eyes at Regina’s twitching nostrils, which had definitely just twitched again.

“You’re sick,” Emma asserted.  It was a wild guess, she knew, but she couldn’t recall Regina mentioning any allergies, and she figured allergies were definitely something she should have been well informed about by now.  Regina knew Emma was allergic to rabbits, for example, so clearly the same information should have been shared back.  If not, they really needed to have a talk about the proper habits of sharing important information, such as allergens.

“I am not.”  Regina punctuated her sentence with a telling sniffle and scowled.

Even as she glared at Emma, it lacked the usual playful menace.  For the first time that evening, Emma noticed the older woman even looked a bit tired.

“You definitely are.  Just let me take care of the check and we can head back to your house.”  Emma started to look around for a waiter, but was stopped by a sight in the corner of her eye.

The twitch in Regina’s nose seemed to have reached its breaking point.  She was stubbornly resisting, crinkling her nose as little as possible to ward off the itch, but to Emma it might as well have been more notable than a billboard.  Emma watched as, very slowly, Regina’s lips began to part, her upper lip pulling up into a sneer with each hitching breath that managed to escape.  Her eyes fluttered shut as her head reared back, every part of her moving with the labored breaths, down to her chest.  Finally, Regina gave in and lifted a hand toward her face, just in time to catch the sneezes she unleashed as quietly as possible.

“Huhhh… ehhh…. huhhhhehhhSHOO!  ShIEW!  HuuRESHHoo!”

By the time Regina was finished blowing her nose, now thoroughly flushed with embarrassment at having made such a scene in Storybrooke’s finest dining facility—which really was hardly that nice—Emma had slipped the waiter enough bills to cover their meals and the tip before Regina could even catch her breath enough to protest.

“With a cold like that, you really should be in bed.”  Emma said, offering her hand to help Regina stand.

“I’b fide,” Regina grumbled back.

Emma laughed, but followed Regina out the door without argument anyways.  There was still plenty of time on the chilly walk home for Regina to accept her fate. 

[LifeOfTheMarauders]

This was really good! I usually root more for Captain Swan because...well I mean look at Hook! He is sooo devilishly handsome....Anyway, I like this concept and hope to see some more sneezes on the walk home!

[Evilduckling108]

AHHH okay so I've just recently been in kind of an SQ renaissance I guess where I've just been craving all things swan queen and this is just, yes I am here for this.  I always love to see Regina suffer and this was just such a nice surprise! I really like your spellings and omg that bit about her being embarrassed at causing a scene, I'm so here for that. Also Emma just being generally confused and nervous is so cute and in short I'm basically just totally in love with this whole thing! I really hope you do decide to continue because I will straight up DIE 

[SexyGodlikeHair]

AAHHH!! So cute! And quite a different setting too; well, for this pairing at least. Thank you!!!

[Likesn]

Yay! Swan Queen! I'd love to see Emma taking care of sick Regina (and catching her cold, of course (:3 ) 

[YoriYori]

Swan Queen yesss 

I love the build up of how it's written from Emma's perspective and she's so preoccupied with making sure that the date goes well and only slowly starts to notice something is wrong with Regina. I really hope you have the inspiration to continue some day. It's hard to find Swan Queen fic with sneezy Regina that's this well written. 

[PropertyofCora]

On 3/30/2017 at 0:42 AM, MarauderFanGirl4Ever said:

This was really good! I usually root more for Captain Swan because...well I mean look at Hook! He is sooo devilishly handsome....Anyway, I like this concept and hope to see some more sneezes on the walk home!

Thank you!  Personally, I'm not the biggest fan of CS, though I'll indulge in reading it on here because the ouat stuff can be so tragically limited, and some have been enjoyable.  Thanks for giving this a chance anyways!

On 3/31/2017 at 0:52 AM, Evilduckling108 said:

AHHH okay so I've just recently been in kind of an SQ renaissance I guess where I've just been craving all things swan queen and this is just, yes I am here for this.  I always love to see Regina suffer and this was just such a nice surprise! I really like your spellings and omg that bit about her being embarrassed at causing a scene, I'm so here for that. Also Emma just being generally confused and nervous is so cute and in short I'm basically just totally in love with this whole thing! I really hope you do decide to continue because I will straight up DIE 

Well, I hope you're still in the SQ mood, because I've come back with more!  Please don't die, though, I'd hate to be writing for a ghost audience.  Haha, I agree, as much as I love Regina, there's just something about her being forced to show such menial weaknesses that really gets to me, and Emma's just such a puppy sometimes.  Thank you for this kind response!

On 3/31/2017 at 7:24 PM, SexyGodlikeHair said:

AAHHH!! So cute! And quite a different setting too; well, for this pairing at least. Thank you!!!

Thank you!  I feel like eventually, they just might end up somewhere more often utilized, but for now I'm having fun torturing Regina dragging them all over town.

On 4/9/2017 at 4:31 PM, Likesn said:

Yay! Swan Queen! I'd love to see Emma taking care of sick Regina (and catching her cold, of course (:3 ) 

You may be in luck!  Regina seems to be really bad at keeping her germs to herself, so that just may be in the cards for her at some point.

On 5/13/2017 at 7:38 PM, cherry said:

Swan Queen yesss 

I love the build up of how it's written from Emma's perspective and she's so preoccupied with making sure that the date goes well and only slowly starts to notice something is wrong with Regina. I really hope you have the inspiration to continue some day. It's hard to find Swan Queen fic with sneezy Regina that's this well written. 

Awe, thank you so much!  I had actually forgotten about this a little, but your review reminded me I had a half finished chapter just waiting to be finished and posted, so thank you for that as well.  

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Well, I'm back with more!  Thank you to everyone who enjoyed the first part.  I already have a lot planned out for the next installment, but after that finale I think we could all use this right now.  

On a side note, before I get started, the actress who plays Zelena mentioned tonight that she was "so sick" during the filming of the second hour of the finale, as well as that recap/interview thing they showed before airing.  If you saw, you probably heard and swooned over her sick voice like I did, because WOW.  This got me thinking that I could have a lot of fun writing a story of Zelena suffering a similar fate, but before I get too into it, is that something anyone would be interested in reading?

And now, without further ado, I present you,

 

PART 2:

Emma shivered and rubbed her palms together.  When they arrived at the restaurant, it hadn’t been too bad considering how horrible the fall weather could be in Maine, but now the sun had set, and there was a definite chill to the air.  She winced and looked over at Regina, who had at least dressed more sensibly than her, but still looked startled by the wind.

“Maybe we should just poof home?” Emma suggested.  The walk, of course, had been part of her original plans for their date.  She was going to take Regina down to the beach where Henry’s old castle still stood strong, and she even had a blanket laid out for them to curl up upon together.  They’d watch the stars and revisit old memories from before so much had changed between them.  It was cheesy, but so was Emma at the worst of times, and Regina seemed to like her anyways.

“I can’t,” Regina sniffled, “I might sneeze.”

“You might… sneeze?” Emma asked, sure she had heard wrong.

“Yes.”  Regina nodded and hugged her arms across her chest defensively—though Emma suspected it was also in part to help ward off the chill.  “If I sneeze while I try to… poof, as you insist on calling it… then it could go badly.”  Regina paused to rub at her nose with a curved knuckle, looking desperately itchy already. 

Emma shrugged.  “I can do it.”  She did have magic, after all, but Regina looked at her like she’d lost her mind at the suggestion.  “What?” Emma asked, feeling sheepishly embarrassed but not knowing why.

“Emma, your aim with travel is, at best, acceptable on a clear day.  But I think you’ve had a little more wine than I’m comfortable with for tonight.  Besides, why would we head ho…hhuuhhhh… HuuESHOO!  Home.”  Regina sniffled thickly but did little to back down.

Emma rolled her eyes and started walking in the direction of Regina’s house, not wanting the obviously ill woman to stand outside any longer than needed.  “Really, Regina?” she asked once they were both on the sidewalk.  “Maybe because you’re sick?”

Regina huffed.  “It’s just a cold, I think I’ll live.  I’ve survived much worse.  Besides, you mentioned having plans for after dinner.  I don’t want things cut short for a few sneezes.”

Emma paused in her steps and turned, holding onto Regina’s elbow to get her to stop, and looked her in the eye.  “My plans kind of involved us being outside for a while.  Are you sure you really want to do that?”

She could see the hesitance in Regina’s eyes, and again the woman twisted away from her to release two wet sneezes into her jacket sleeve.  Huhhh hiiSHEOoo, HuhhRESHoo!  Regina straightened back up, face flushed.

“Ebba,” she snuffled, and in the glow of the streetlamp Emma could just make out a flush of embarrassment overtake her cheeks.  “Em-ma,” she enunciated,  “I’m not going to endanger my life over it, but I want to see what you planned.  This is special to me.”

Emma frowned.  “It’s not like we can’t do it another time, Regina.  There will be other dates.”  She smiled nervously.  “At least, I hope.”

Regina sighed.  “There will be,” she said firmly, like it was a given and written in law, and Emma felt her heart beat a little harder.  “However, I must confess, I’ve never been on a date before.  This is new to me, and I’m not quite sure what I’m doing because this custom had no part in my upbringing, and even after… well, you’ve seen how all that went.  So I don’t want this evening to be spoiled just because my nose won’t obey.”

It was so utterly Regina, how she scrunched up the offending nose in frustration just to demonstrate her point, that Emma had to laugh.  As if this was her nose’s fault, and how dare it try this when something important was happening.

“Fine, but promise you’ll tell me if you feel worse.”

“I pr…rrruhhh… huuhhrrueeSHIEW!  HureshhO!”

“Close enough.”  Emma grinned, hooping her arm around Regina’s and leading them off toward the beach.

--------------

Regina sneezed exactly seven more times before they reached the castle, which Emma knew because she counted them all.  She could see the brunette felt worse than she was letting on, but there was no stopping that stubborn streak.  Emma compensated by walking just a little closer than usual, hoping some of her own body warmth might rub off on Regina enough to help.  It was foolish, probably, but she noticed Regina smiling anyways.

“The castle?” Regina raised an eyebrow.

“Yup.  Ladies first!”  Emma grasped Regina’s hand and led her to the ladder she would have to climb in the moonlight.  Carefully, as Regina wouldn’t have been Regina without her heels, Emma helped her up, holding onto her waist and guiding her onto the thin little rungs on the wooden ladder.  Always poised, it was doubtful to Emma that Regina actually needed any help, but she relished the chance to add some intimacy to their date.  She was nearly there when Emma felt Regina tense beneath her fingers.

“You okay?” she called.

Regina didn’t respond, or perhaps she had responded, but Emma was having trouble hearing over the sound of the waves gently splashing along the shore.  With her hands on Regina’s waist, she could feel just enough to know her breath was coming in short gasps, and then she tensed to the point of jerking and Emma heard the telltale HurrESHOO! ESHoo! Huhh…. HIESHoo! of Regina sneezing up above her.  She was so surprised, she nearly lost her grip, but tightened it when Regina started to fall backwards, foot slipping from the force of her uncontrollable sneezes.

“Woah!  I’ve got you.”  Emma’s fingers clenched tightly into her waist, helping to re-balance the brunette, only even after she thought Regina must have  been steady, she still had yet to continue her climb.  Puzzled, Emma asked, “Everything okay up there?”

“Fine,” Regina hissed.  Though Emma couldn’t see her face, the reply sounded as though it was coming through clenched teeth.  She was about to probe further when Regina, without warning, began to move up the last few steps, drawing Emma’s attention back to actually keeping her steadied this time.  Once she cleared the top, Emma yanked herself up after.

By the time she made it up, Regina had moved out of the way and up besides the railing.  She leaned against it, staring out at the water, and though there were no lights, in the reflection from the moonlight, Emma could see little wisps of her hair blowing out around her face.  Steeling her nerves, Emma reached out and brushed a brunette strand back behind her ear. 

They stood in silence for a moment, both enjoying the time, trying to interpret the intimacy as it grew and learn from one another what might be appropriate to try next.  Finally, Regina cleared her throat and whispered, “It’s beautiful up here.  I’ve never been up.”

“Never?” Emma quirked a brow.  She’d found Henry here only her second day in Storybrooke and quickly learned it was one of his most frequented locations. 

“I was never invited up,” Regina explained in response to Emma’s unspoken question.  Of course, she should have considered the memories she was dredging up by bringing her here, were not exactly great ones for Regina.

“Sorry,” Emma mumbled, bumping their shoulders together as she joined her in leaning against the railing.  Beside her, Regina sniffled in a way she probably thought was discreet, and Emma pretended not to notice the tiny squishing sound as she brought a knuckle up to her nose and rubbed it stubbornly.

“What for?” Regina asked, snapping her head up.

Emma shrugged.  “Bringing you here.  I didn’t think about the fact that him coming here probably didn’t mean the same to you as it did to me.

“Emma,” Regina began, placing the same hand she’d just been rubbing at her nose with atop Emma’s wrist.  She bit back a laugh and pretended not to notice.  “Don’t apologize.  I meant what I said—it is beautiful.  And as much as I loathed you back then, it’s nice to remember how far we’ve come.”

“So I didn’t mess up?” Emma asked hopefully.

Regina shook her head. “Nnn-no.”  She pulled her hand back from Emma’s arm and scrubbed at her nose again.

“You sure you’re not really Sneezy in disguise?” Emma joked.

“N-not fun-nn-ny.” Regina’s breath shook and she sniffled again, louder this time.  Though Emma couldn’t make out her expression very well, she was familiar with the sounds of desperation when she heard them.

“Is it stuck?” she asked, turning to face Regina with her curiosity piqued.  She could hear the telltale signs of Regina scrubbing at her nose again and grinned.

“Yes,” Regina whined, which was almost a marvel in itself because she could only recall having heard the regal woman one on exactly one other occasion, which she was still forbidden from speaking about.

“Want help?”  Emma surprised herself with the offer, but couldn’t deny there was something fascinating in having that kind of control over it.

Regina inhaled sharply, and let out a shaky breath, cut up by a cough.  “T-tissue?” she asked, voice getting breathier.

Emma frowned.  “No, sorry, I gave you the whole pack at the restaurant.”  She considered her purse for a moment, but there was nothing helpful that might draw out Regina’s stuck sneeze.  Her own usually could be guided out by one of two things:  a bright light, which they were sadly lacking at the moment, or a quick blunt tap on the nose.  Before she could lose her nerve, Emma reached forward and booped Regina right on her quivering nostrils.

At first, nothing happened.  Regina’s breathy gasps grew quiet and Emma stood still, waiting.  Then, as if a dam had suddenly been split in half, Regina sucked in a deep breath and bent forward with the power of her sneezes, only barely managing to grab Emma’s arm for support.

Hhuuuuh… AhhhhIIITCHiew!  HECHieww! Huh… hurESHoo!

“Bless you.”  Emma blinked in surprise, but Regina wasn’t quite finished. 

Huhh… hiiireeehhhh… HIRESHHOoO!

Regina finished with a gurgling snuffle that made Emma wince with sympathy.

“You done yet?” she teased, trying to keep the mood light.  If she knew Regina—and she very much prided herself on her extensive knowledge of the older woman—then she knew the brunette absolutely hated any display of weakness or mess.  She’d either gotten suddenly much more comfortable around Emma, or more likely, she was so miserable she no longer could help it.  At the thought, Emma fought the urge to embarrass her further by making a big deal about it.  For the time being, she would have to let the evening play out.

Regina sniffed hesitantly and finally nodded her approval.  “Yes, I believe so.”

“Well then in that case, I’ve got the blanket laid out behind us, care for some star gazing?”  Emma didn’t voice the second half of her plan, which was to wrap as much of Regina in that blanket as possible without her noticing. 

“That sounds lovely.”  And then, before she could even turn back away from the railing, Regina let forth with yet another HehhSHIEEW!

[SexyGodlikeHair]

Ah!!!! An even cuter continuation-amazing! I'm so happy you continued this, and I can't wait to read the next installment!

[Evilduckling108]

Ah, I can't believe I missed this when it was posted?! I love it!

On 5/15/2017 at 4:19 AM, PropertyofCora said:

“I can’t,” Regina sniffled, “I might sneeze.”

 

“You might… sneeze?” Emma asked, sure she had heard wrong.

This exchange was honestly probably my favorite just because I kind of love the idea of things like this messing up Regina's powers and it was just so sweet! Regina trying not to draw attention to herself while Emma's just totally clueless, UGH I just love them!  I'm really looking forward to reading more

Also, if you decide to write anything for Zelena, I would for sure read that too!