Decorations (Christmas FMA fic)

[Sawyer]

It's been about a year since I posted anything in here! December always has me super nostalgic for Fullmetal Alchemist (since I first fell in love with it back in winter 2006), and this year I guess I couldn't help myself! I wrote this yesterday and I want to give a huuuuuuuge thank you to Effily, who stood by my side and beta-read for me every 500 words and offered inspiration galore. I literally wouldn't have done it without you, and it's been so fun sharing ideas! I can't wait to do the same for you!

This fic takes place post-series (so, big spoiler warning, I guess!) and ended up getting way longer than I intended. For people who haven't followed the series, Ed and Al are brothers, their mom died when they were young, they tried to bring her back to life and Ed lost two limbs while Al's soul was stuck in a suit of armor. Al got his body back in the end, and Ed only had to keep his prosthetic metal leg.

By the way! The little "«" only indicates a POV switch. It's just one long and simple scene with no time skips, so it shouldn't be too confusing!

-

Perhaps the novelty of sensory experience would fade with time, but Al was pleased that even two years after getting his body back, something deep inside of him would fill with glee each time he reentered his and Ed’s apartment. The warm stillness of the air to contrast with winter’s bitter winds, the softness of the welcome mat when he removed his boots, and, most importantly, the recent strong smell of pine, all reminded him to be grateful of the rewards of his brother’s efforts.

They didn’t have a chance to celebrate the holidays together the year before because of travel, and the year before that Al had found himself too physically weak to celebrate properly, his body still recovering from years of malnutrition. This winter, he had insisted on picking up a tree ("at least a small one, Brother!” had become “I promise this one isn’t taller than our ceiling! If it is, I’ll cut it shorter myself!”) and decorating it with all the trimmings. They still had yet to do the latter, but Al planned on changing that this evening and he had come home prepared.

He was just beginning to set down shopping bags full of light strings and tinsel when he heard an uncharacteristically unrestrained “HAHT’ehkSHhuh!” coming from the study. Had Ed not heard him coming in through the front door? The place was more than roomy enough for the two of them, but not so big that the sound of a door closing and boots being kicked off wouldn’t be audible through a couple of thin walls.

Demonstrating just that, Al called out a “Bless you,” without having to raise his voice. His brother stepped into the living room just seconds later, wearing a curious expression and rubbing his knuckles on the side of his nose.

“Hey Al.” Ed’s voice was hoarse, possibly from hours of misuse while Al was out shopping, and his cheeks were flushed pink. “When did you get home?”

“Not too long ago. I haven’t even taken off my coat.” Al gestured to his wool-clad chest, as if he needed to provide proof.

The shorter Elric moved closer and took a couple heavy bags from his brother. Involuntarily, Al sighed with relief. His body’s lack of strength in comparison to the suit of armor was an inconvenience, sure, but it was an inconvenience he wouldn’t trade for anything in the world.

“Jeez, Al, did you rob the place or something?” Ed asked as he began to unpack his brother’s purchases.

Scandalized, Al gasped out, “Brother, I would never! Most of these things were on sale, you know,” he added defensively.

Ed chuckled. “Relax, I’m just teasing. Although you probably did spend a week’s worth of… of huhNGSTch!”

“Bless you,” Al said automatically, wincing. He didn’t know why Ed always tried to hold them in like that – he was surprised Ed’s eardrums had yet to burst. “Are you catching a cold?”

“I’m fine.”

It was almost like a catch phrase. Whenever somebody showed the slightest amount of concern or offered to do him a favor, the response was always I’m fine or Don’t worry about it or It’s alright and so on and so forth. Al was often having to implement clever ways of trying to get his brother to discuss his well-being in earnest. He wasn’t sure if it was because of Ed’s ego, or because he genuinely felt as though he wasn’t worth fretting over. The two options seemed to be at odds with one another, but constantly traveling for several years had exposed Al to many types of people. This taught him that a big ego and low self-esteem didn’t always have to be mutually exclusive.

Still, Ed hadn’t exactly denied that he was getting sick. Al would just have to keep an eye on him.

«

Ed knew that his brother hadn’t bought his dismissive remark. Spending so many years trapped in suit of armor had caused Al to forget how much of a giveaway his facial expressions could be, and Ed could read him like a book. Mistrust, concern, exasperation. Al’s metallic, echoing sighs and tense posture were obvious tells before, but his newfound furrowed eyebrows and stubborn frown revealed as much about his feelings as words possibly could.

“Aht’NDJSHuh!” That one had almost caught him by surprise, but he managed to turn away from Al and the decorations out of politeness. He’d gotten better at it after Al got his body back – Ed didn’t want to accidentally pass any germs onto his brother in his fragile state. He suspected that even now, years later, Al’s immune system was still recovering.

“Bless you,” Al said again, but didn’t comment further. He didn’t have to. Ed knew it would only be a matter of time until his brother would start insisting that he stay home from work tomorrow.

“Thanks,” Ed answered shortly with the intention of sounding indifferent, but he could hear the congestion starting to show through in his voice. Feeling Al’s scrutinizing gaze, he tried changing the subject. “How long’s it going to take you to put all this stuff up, anyway? Looks like you bought every type of Christmas decoration known to man. Bells, tinsel, stockings, garlands,” he listed, as if creating an itinerary as he pulled items from their bags.

“I thought we could decorate together,” Al suggested cheerfully. “We haven’t had a real Christmas together since – What’s wrong, Brother?”

Ed hadn’t even realized that his face had fallen as he held the electric strings of Christmas lights. Perhaps facial transparency went two ways. Al was right; it had been a long time. Their last holiday season spent decorating the tree with those had been with their mother.

“Just a headache,” Ed decided. It wasn’t exactly untrue, and he’d rather admit to a little head cold than go through the pain of bringing up old memories that wouldn’t change anything for the better. The most it would do is darken their evening and disappoint Al – he’d been so excited to revive old Christmas traditions, and Ed would be damned if he let his own melancholy get in the way of that.

“Oh!” Al sounded surprised at Ed’s admission, and he immediately started to rummage through one of the bags in front of him. He pulled out a tin of cookies and a couple pieces of fruit before producing a mesh bag full of tea leaves.

“It’s peppermint,” he explained. “Remember making it for me last year when I kept getting sick? I always felt a lot better, so I thought it might come in handy this season too.”

“Oh yeah,” Ed recalled. “It really helped that much?”

Al smiled, nodding as he stood. “How about you finish taking out all the decorations, and I’ll brew us both a cup.”

«

By the time they’d hung up the garland and stockings, Al was itching to weave the lights into the branches of their tree. The radio station they’d tuned in to was allowing classic Christmas songs to resonate softly throughout the living room, which heightened Al’s holiday spirit tenfold.

He dragged the ladder out from their storage area and set it next to the tree. There was only an inch of space between the tip of the tree and their ceiling – not enough room for a star or anything, but Al still wanted the lights nice and high. Their mom had always been the one to do this part, and Al fondly remembered being small and catching the electric strings as they fell and wrapping them around the trees’ branches.

“Ow!” He also remembered her warning them not to get pricked by the pine needles as they did so.

“Careful,” he heard Ed say from behind him. “What’d you do?”

The both of them looked down as a small dot of blood appeared on the tip of Al’s index finger. Ed pulled a cloth off of the coffee table and went to place it on the cut, but with unfocused eyes he missed and dabbed at Al’s palm instead.

“Are you okay?” Al asked.

“What are you talking about?” Ed grumbled, embarrassed, as he moved the cloth upwards to absorb the blood. “You’re the one who’s bleeding.”

“I know, but you just—”

“Here, you should bandage that up so it doesn’t get infected,” Ed insisted.

“It’s just a pinprick,” Al argued, but he handed the lights to Ed and started to make his way to the medicine cabinet anyway. “I’ll get the tea when I’m done, okay?”

«

Ed had to admit, tea didn’t sound so great when his skin was already feeling so hot and clammy. Just hours ago he’d been considering donning his coat while working at his desk. But now? He felt that they could even stand to open a window or two. Still, he’d already come clean about coming down with something, and Al did say that the drink was at least a little medicinal.

Hell, he’d been the one to tell Al about it in the first place. Maybe the fever was making him forgetful.

And perhaps a little nostalgic too, come to think of it, although it wasn’t necessarily in a pleasant way. The lights felt heavy in his hands, even though logically he knew they shouldn’t have. The memories he had of Christmas weren’t really ones he visited often, and being confronted with them so blatantly made his heart ache in a way he hadn’t felt in a while. He’d adopted his mother’s philosophy of moving forward and focusing on what you did have instead of what was unquestionably and permanently lost, but something about the unexpected freshness of such an old memory had caught his emotions off-guard in a way he couldn’t shake off.

When did the lights become so thin and delicate? His hands were so big now; he was afraid he’d crush them.

“Hp’NGTchsh!” And there was that too, if he didn’t already have enough to worry about. “Hah’NGTcheh!” Ed tugged on the lights involuntarily as his arms reached up to reflexively cover the lower half of his face. They made a gentle grating sound as they dragged slightly across the wood floor.

“Bless you,” Al said from the other room, just moments before he appeared in the doorway. He set two mugs down on the coffee table. “Come sit down, Brother. This will help.”

“Thanks,” Ed replied. He dropped the lights and headed closer, then picked up the mug and brought it close to his face. He couldn’t smell the peppermint, but the herbs did produce a tingling sensation on his tongue as he took a sip. “It’s good.”

Al smiled. The two of them sat in silence as the radio played an instrumental rendition of “Oh, Holy Night”, which soon transitioned into a pre-recorded choral performance of “Silver Bells”. Neither Ed nor his brother were very musically inclined, but Ed knew that Al had a certain appreciation for the calming cheerful melodies that surrounded them during each holiday season. Maybe it was nostalgia or maybe it was the music itself, but either way it made Ed feel a little better to see his brother’s head subtly rocking back and forth as he looked at the snow through the window, just like he’d done when they were kids.

A sharp jingling sound snapped Ed out of his trance.

“I’m going to attach these to the garlands on the shelf,” Al announced, holding a transparent bag full of shiny round bells. “Do you want to start wrapping the lights around the tree?”

Ed looked into his mug. It was half-empty, but he could finish the rest in a moment. “No problem,” he answered.

He saw black spots when he stood, but his mother never had any trouble with the lights, even after she had fallen ill. There was no reason he couldn’t do the job almost as well with just a fever. Ed took a step forward and felt himself waver.

“How’s your head?” Al asked, already pulling a chair from the kitchen up to the shelf where most of the garlands hung.

“It’s okay,” Ed answered simply.

“Any better?”

Ed gave a noncommittal shrug. What was with the third degree? He would see how Al liked being interrogated. “How’s your finger?” he challenged.

But Al only chuckled and rolled his eyes, wagging his index finger with nothing but friendliness. “Good as new!”

Ed grabbed the string of lights from the floor and climbed up a few steps on the ladder until he could reach the top of the tree. He had to stretch his arms to get the lights all the way around, just like he remembered their mom doing. She would giggle as she dropped it each time, leaving it to him and Al to straighten the lights on the bottom. Ed looked down and was nearly overcome with an unwelcome helping of vertigo.

He slowly lifted his head to combat the feeling, then turned to see how Al was doing. Ed felt a twinge of bitterness when his brother nearly bumped his head on the ceiling as he attempted to himself on the chair, wondering why he’d never grown tall enough to have such a fortunate inconvenience.

When Ed saw the top of Al’s hair graze the ceiling a second time, he craned his body toward his brother and warned, “Hey, watch your head!” just before he lost his footing and tumbled onto the floor.

«

“Brother!” Al quickly stepped down, watching cautiously as the tree shook from the collision. Thankfully, its base was secure, and it stilled after just a few seconds.

“Oww,” Ed complained, sitting up and rubbing his side. He hadn’t been at the top of the ladder when he fell, but judging by the sound he made as he hit the ground, Al assumed the fall would at least leave a bruise.

“Are you okay?” he asked, holding out a hand to help his brother up. “What happened?”

“I dunno,” Ed answered with a glare toward the ladder as he stood. “Maybe we should get that thing fixed—”

Al was already inspecting the ladder, dusting off the steps and trying to rock it back and forth to test its sturdiness. “Looks to me like you just lost your balance. Brother, you should really be more careful…”

«

Ed would never in a million years describe himself as clumsy, and he had years of vigorous training, combat, and exercise to back him up. His balance was impeccable, so long as he wasn’t distracted or dealing with the elements. The last time Ed tripped like that had been on the icy ground in Briggs, he recalled silently with a shiver.

“Are you cold?” Before Ed knew it, Al had stamped his palm on his forehead. When Al had first gotten his body back, this was something he did frequently, even if he didn’t suspect Ed of being sick. He just liked to compare his own body temperature to someone else’s as a reminder that he finally had a body temperature in the first place. It was a small and sincere gesture, so when Ed had complained about it, it was mostly for appearances.

“Actually, it feels like someone lit a fire in my—”

“Why didn’t you tell me you had a fever!” interrupted Al.

Ed held up his hands in defense. “It’s not that bad!” he protested. “I’m not feeling cold anymore, and that means it’s already starting to come down. It’s nothing to worry about, Al, promise.”

“Well, at least sit down and rest,” Al said. “You know, it’s hard not to worry about you when you keep this kind of thing from me.”

«

Al watched as his brother averted his gaze. Why was Ed so insistent on bearing burdens on his own? It wasn’t like it caused Al much trouble to take care of him; in fact, it was more exhausting to try and figure out what was wrong with Ed on his own, and tailor his behavior accordingly. If Ed would just accept help…

“Kind of funny,” Al lamented aloud. “That’s something mom used to tell you all the time. Do you remember? She’d have to practically force you to rest and drink your medicine.”

Ed’s pupils dilated then, and he cleared his throat. “Yeah,” he said softly. He was silent for a few moments, and then his whole demeanor changed. “Hey! How about we finish hanging up the lights. I already got half of them around the tree, might as well get the job done, right?”

Al hesitated, taking in the light pink color on Ed’s face and the dark circles under his eyes.

“Come on, I’ll even let you hold the ladder if it makes you feel better,” tempted Ed. He was sounding lucid, and he had a determined gleam in his eye. Al wouldn’t put it past him to be feigning energy to distract Al from his fever, but if Ed had the energy to fake it, he couldn’t be that sick. Certainly well enough to finish wrapping lights around a tree.

“Okay,” Al finally agreed. “As long as you promise to take it easy for the rest of the night while I’m making dinner.”

“Deal,” Ed answered with a grin. He stepped back on to the ladder and restarted his previous task, all while proceeding to chat Al’s ear off about all that came to mind – his latest responsibilities at work, his anticipated research, his feelings on the weather, the music, the type of lights Al chose to buy (white instead of assorted colors) – and only pausing to cough every once in a while when he ran out of breath. His voice was sounding rougher the longer he talked, but Al supposed he could brew another pot of tea as he made dinner.

It wasn’t until Al was finishing up the bottom of the tree (while Ed straightened out the lights near the top) that Al looked up to notice how much his brother was sweating. He looked concentrated as he worked, but he also looked miserably warm.

In a hurry to get Ed to rest, Al declared, “I’m all done, Brother. Your half looks great!” He stood up from his crouching position, making him eye-level with Ed’s collarbone. It was certainly weird to have to look up at his big brother after all these years, but much like Christmas, it acted as a pleasant reminder of the early days of their childhood.

Ed looked down and gripped the side of the ladder, blinking hard.

“You okay?” Al asked. Ed had never been afraid of heights, and Al wondered what the reason could be for the pained look on his face.

“Little dizzy,” Ed admitted. “I’ll be fine as soon as I—”

“Whoa!” Al caught him just as Ed lifted his foot to step down and started to tip forward toward the tree. Once Ed was steady, Al guided him down off the ladder. “Come on, Brother. I think your fever’s worse.”

Ed shook his head and mumbled something.

“What?” Al said.

“I said,” Ed clarified, “the radiator’s broken. That’s why it’s so hot in here.”

Al frowned. “I feel fine.”

“That’s because…” Ed paused to cough. “Sorry. That’s because you’re so skinny. You’re more sensitive to the cold, so it makes sense that you’d only feel comfortable when it’s like, a billion degrees inside.”

Al opened his mouth to argue, but decided against it. “I don’t think that’s it, Brother,” was all he said. He’d put on a lot of weight in the last couple years, and his diet was finally that of a normal healthy young man. He hadn’t had temperature issues in months.

Ed was quiet for a moment; unexpectedly so, as Al had expected him to continue to argue that everything in their home was having issues before he admitted his own body was the problem. Instead, when Ed finally spoke, he said, “…I think I need to sit down.”

“Do you need any help?” Al asked.

“I’ll be fine,” Ed answered. He swayed a little on his way to the couch, but he stayed true to his word. Al made a brief trip to the kitchen to add more peppermint leaves to the kettle, thankful that the water had yet to cool completely.

When he returned, Al found his brother slumped against the backrest of the couch with his eyes half-closed. He looked like he was about to slide off. But something – pride, perhaps – kept him from lying down horizontally.

“You should really be in bed,” chided Al.

“Maybe after dinner,” Ed suggested back. His voice was quiet. “Sorry for…”

For overworking himself? For trying to hide a fever? For refusing to accept help? For pushing his limits just for Al’s sake? “It’s okay.” It was just how Ed was. “Sorry you aren’t feeling well enough to really enjoy any of our old traditions.”

«

“Doesn’t it feel bittersweet to you?” Ed suddenly blurted out.

“What?”

Ed paused and felt himself tense up. The reason he’d tried to fake so much energy in the first place was so they could get this over with and he wouldn’t have to talk about it. Still, he knew Al would pry if he didn’t come clean about it now.

“The old traditions, like you said,” Ed elaborated. “It doesn’t remind you of…”

“Of what, Brother?”

Did he really have to say it?

“You know.” Ed felt himself sliding further down on the sofa, and he gripped the cushion for support. “Before.”

He felt Al’s hand grip his bicep and tug him upright. “You mean mom?”

Yeah, exactly. “Yeah, I guess.”

“It does,” Al said, but he didn’t sound sad. “That’s why I wanted the decorations in the first place. The whole process of setting everything up and having something festive to look at every day makes me feel… closer to her. She never let us have a barren Christmas, even near the end.”

“I never thought of it that way,” Ed murmured. He’d spent his life repeating to himself that something he couldn’t change was something he shouldn’t think about in detail, especially if the memories had unpleasant reminders attached to them. Al had always been the most optimistic of the two of them, no doubt about that, so really, Ed wasn’t surprised that he offered such a comforting perspective.

“You’re tired,” Al noted with a smile. Ed felt his brother’s absence as he got up from his place next to him on the couch. “Maybe you should try taking a nap here while I get dinner started.”

“Doesn’t sound so bad…” Ed considered. He felt his cheeks and neck get hot when his voice cracked on the last word, and he cleared his throat. “And bring some of that tea, too.”

“Sure,” Al promised, and Ed returned a nod of thanks. The last thing Ed saw before he closed his eyes was Al’s bright smile as he said, “I’m glad I can help.”

Edited December 16, 2015 by Sen Beret

[Emily]

OHMY GOD I LOVE IT, IT'S ALL IN ONE PIECE!!!!! I literally felt my lips turn up in a smile at the last line, it's so sweet!!

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS DIDN'T EXIST THREE DAYS AGO....

I'm gonna go ahead and copypasta all the bits I haven't commented on yet because I love so much about this... also because I fed you my porn preferences but anyway.

("at least a small one, Brother!” had become “I promise this one isn’t taller than our ceiling! If it is, I’ll cut it shorter myself!”)

Al is the cutest oh my goodness he's so excited I love him

“Careful,” he heard Ed say from behind him. “What’d you do?”

The both of them looked down as a small dot of blood appeared on the tip of Al’s index finger. Ed pulled a cloth off of the coffee table and went to place it on the cut, but with unfocused eyes he missed and dabbed at Al’s palm instead.

“Are you okay?” Al asked.

“What are you talking about?” Ed grumbled, embarrassed, as he moved the cloth upwards to absorb the blood. “You’re the one who’s bleeding.”

“I know, but you just—”

CAN YOUHEAR ME YELLING I LOVE THIS A LOT. It's so good no matter how many times I read it, the irony!!

“Hp’NGTchsh!” And there was that too, if he didn’t already have enough to worry about. “Hah’NGTcheh!” Ed tugged on the lights involuntarily as his arms reached up to reflexively cover the lower half of his face. They made a gentle grating sound as they dragged slightly across the wood floor.

I love when snez affects environmental factors....I mean not like a house-destroying sneeze but like, gentle, like this, this is very good. I love

– and only pausing to cough every once in a while when he ran out of breath. His voice was sounding rougher the longer he talked, but Al supposed he could brew another pot of tea as he made dinner.

You already know I love this but I love it the more I imagine the scene, cute and heartwarming but also oh my goodness, are you okay Ed

Instead, when Ed finally spoke, he said, “…I think I need to sit down.”

The greatest climax to me, tbh. I swooned in real time when I first read it and there were !!!!! all around my head.

“You’re tired,” Al noted with a smile.

OH MY GOD YOU PUT IT IN HERE, YOU DID IT, YOU'RE SO SNEAKY YOU DIDN'T TELL ME THIS BEFORE I AM ALL SMILES

The last thing Ed saw before he closed his eyes was Al’s bright smile as he said, “I’m glad I can help.”

ME: BEAMING FOR THESE TWO CUTE THINGS.....

I'm so amazed how this all came together oh my god. Thank you for putting the effort and time to write it!!! I would have nothing to cheer you on if you didn't have anything to show me in the first place so thank you for writing it and showing me every step of the way. Spending the time sharing ideas with you and seeing it happen was the greatest gift I could have had tbh and I'm so happy we fell back into the fandom at the same time this year!!! LET'S DO IT AGAIN SOON.

[Sitruuna]

Omg this is great

I absolutely love it

Poor Ed u_u~

B )

[kendisima]

This is so sweet and wonderful! Poor Ed. You write their relationship so well, and everything felt really in character, especially Al's quiet fretting over his big brother who refuses to take care of himself

I adored this. Thanks for sharing it!

[Pyrus_Fangmon]

Oh my god this was beautiful!!!

I haven't read a FMA story in forever! Ughhhh *sobs*

I love it all! This was perfect!

[Arty]

Omg...Ed!!! "Sick big brother in denial but admits to the little things as not to worry Alphonse Edward Elric!!!!!!!" Yes! This could have so happened especially after FMA: Brotherhood

[OtakuLovesWriting]

On 12/16/2015 at 1:40 AM, Sen Beret said:

“Hp’NGTchsh!” And there was that too, if he didn’t already have enough to worry about. “Hah’NGTcheh!” Ed tugged on the lights involuntarily as his arms reached up to reflexively cover the lower half of his face. They made a gentle grating sound as they dragged slightly across the wood floor.

“Bless you,” Al said from the other room, just moments before he appeared in the doorway. He set two mugs down on the coffee table. “Come sit down, Brother. This will help.”

Edited 16 Dec 2015 by Sen Beret

Oh my this is absolutely amazing holy- 

I don't wanna ramble or anything, but first things first- sick Ed trying to keep his brother healthy and stifling and turning away and everything is just.... *melts* it gives me life

Ed is such a little sweetheart and all, but Al is just the sweetest little thing (maybe not little compared to Edward, but, y'know...)

I can't believe how amazingly well written Ed's sneezes are! I mean, I can literally hear him sneezing in my mind, and it's beautiful. Not only that, but the way this whole fic is written, I can totally imagine everything and it's literally the greatest thing. 

Also, blessings are my favorite thing ever, so I was super happy to see Al blessing Ed. 

So, to finish this rant cause I'm sure this has gotten boring to read, but I absolutely love this and I'm so glad I found this.

*Goes to find more FMA fics*

[alwaysbored84]

Omg, what a sweet little story you’ve made here!!!! Great job!