Survivor's Guilt - (Undertale, M)

[Garnet]

This is a weird fic if you haven't played Undertale. This is an especially weird fic if you have played Undertale. I'm a weird person and I don't really have an excuse, but it's also not the first time I've written a sneezing skeleton monster, so hey. Kinda fuck it, right?

Frisk is non-binary and non-verbal in this. They are hearing, but communicate mostly through sign language, noted in bold. This is set post-Pacifist ending, but with some tiny hints of other timeline stuff. Uh. Enjoy?

---

Guilt was a wellspring bubbling up in Frisk's core as they regarded the tableau of misery before them. A cup of tea had grown tepid, untouched, on the table, and clusters of tissues spilled onto the floor like crumpled knots of surrender. A few were gently herded a few into the nearest trash can, already full to overflowing, and Frisk clucked mentally at how it could have gotten this bad, this fast.

Just a few days ago, the scenario had been much reversed, and they'd been the one buried beneath a mound of blankets, coughing hard enough to evacuate a lung or two. That hadn't been any kind of fun, but seeing the virus make its slow, creeping rounds through the rest of their friends was disconcerting on an entirely different level.

They were monsters. Monsters weren't meant to get sick.

Years upon years logged in isolation had probably accounted for a limited amount of viral contact, though. Acclimating to the Overworld had brought its host of troubles, and subtle factors like contagion were ones that Frisk tended to overlook until faced with the reality of it. As they squinted into the late afternoon sunlight streaming over the huddled shape on the couch, however, they conceded that it still been wholly worth it. They only hoped that their friends felt the same.

A small hand relocated the half-finished Sudoku onto the table, beside the tea and the tissues, and into the new space on the couch Frisk squirmed up. Pat pat pat, the drum of fingers on what they estimated to be a shoulder. No response. Brow knotting into a frown, they jabbed a little harder, this time earning a grunt and the slow swell of a breath expanding beneath them.

That was better. Even if logically, they knew that skeletons didn't need to breathe, it was a bit unsettling to see how utterly motionless they could be firsthand. Especially this skeleton, this one in particular.

Papyrus pushed back the edge of the blanket enough to squint a muzzy look up at his tormentor, and immediately yielded to a smile. He was, technically, always smiling, but Frisk was practiced in picking apart the subtleties of his expressions.

"Tiny human," he greeted in a croak. A rough clear of the imaginary throat did little to improve his tone. "You have returned from the perils of your education."

Frisk glanced to the backpack beside the door. Typically, they bee-lined straight home from school and into Toriel's waiting arms, but a mounting concern over the well-being of their friends had earned a text to their adoptive mother, warning of a slight delay. A nod preceded the touch of a hand to their mouth, swept to the right with fingers curling in.

I am. You're not feeling any better?

Papyrus struggled over the signs for a moment, piecing together the gestures more slowly than he might have in a better humor. "Ah," he said at last, then paused to punctuate his punctuation with a rough cough smothered into the blanket. Sniffling, he recovered. "Despite my appearances, I am much improved! The indomitable Papyrus is practically back in fighting fo--... i-in..." He lost the tail end of the sentence into a look of hazy uncertainty. The ghostlight flicker of pupils in his eye sockets dimmed, and the catch of his psychosomatic breath hitched Frisk a little higher.

With an idea of where this was heading, Frisk braced themself in place, just as Papyrus pressed into the back of the couch and sneezed mightily.

"--H'ESSHHH'iew!"

Despite their precautionary measures, Frisk nearly toppled from their roost with the force of it. A bony hand swept out from beneath the blankets at the last moment, righting them quickly in place.

"Ugh!" Papyrus sniffed, then finished with annoyed determination, "Back in fighting form." He sniffled again, fighting the tide of a congestion that Frisk couldn't actually pinpoint a source for, given his general lack of mucous membranes, then tacked on an apologetic, "Please forgive me, human, it could not be helped."

Bless you! Frisk signed, pressing both fists to their mouth before curving them down and out. They concluded with a reassuring pat to the skeleton's sternum. It's alright.

Papyrus regarded them with drowsy affection. It was strange to see the most wildly animated of their friends down and out for the count, rather than towering above them in the midst of an escalating soliloquy. Not entirely unpleasant, though. He was a hard monster to pin down for a cuddle, sometimes, and Frisk only felt a little bit bad, taking advantage of the situation.

"Tell me what you learned in school," he prompted, earning himself a screwed up scrunch of Frisk's expression.

Writing, math. Boring stuff. I've got some homework, they signed with a sigh. I was hoping Sans would help me with it.

Toriel would have, as well, but it was a nice excuse to visit the brothers now and then, and Sans had a better head for explaining numbers. They were a little impressed, in fact, about just how much he seemed to know about... well... everything.

"I am certain he will."

Frisk panned another look around at the blankets and tissues, tea and other traditional sundries of a sick bed. Toriel had taken care of them with love and earnest, the week prior, and they half-wondered if she hadn't made a stop in here as well. Papyrus seemed to be wanting for little. Did he do all this? They wondered.

Papyrus closed his eyesockets with weary content, an expression that Frisk still hadn't quite figured out the mechanics of. "My brother has been taking exquisitely good care of me," he reported, which infused Frisk's chest with a deep, abiding warmth. Although it had been hard won, and not without persisting trials, at times the domestic bliss of their life seemed too good to trust. Any moment, it was all going to be wrested away, and they would be back to that terrible, lonely time before monsters and magic.

"Human," Papyrus chided gently, pressing one phalange to their cheek. Frisk blinked back to the present, unaware how far they'd drifted. "Are you well?"

Never better, they signed, and hoped the wavery smile communicated some of the depth behind it. I mean that.

"Excellent! I feel the same, in spite of this hideous... what did you call it?"

A headcold, Frisk giggled.

"Yes, horrible stuff! I can't imagine how humans go through this nonsense every season, it's little wonder you're so strong," he diatribed playfully, with a poke of a finger to the baby fat on Frisk's side. They jerked with another laugh, fueling the skeleton's fire. "Where does it all come from, that's what I'd like to know. I don't even have a nose and it's acting up most disobediently. It's snot very amusing, and ugh, ugh, I already hate myself for that pun. Please don't tell Sans."

That sent Frisk over the edge into another fit of mirth. It ended with their arms slung around Papyrus's shoulders, and the soft staccato of his chuckle beneath them. Once it had died down and they had been sprawled thus for a few moments, however, Papyrus gave another hesitant sniffle and patted their back.

"Do not move, human, I... I think I am about to sneeze againnnISSHHH'iew!" His voice fractured and warped as he went, rushing as much of the warning as he could muster before venting into release. Frisk readjusted their clutch carefully, as his ribs spread for another trembling breath. "-- h'ESSHH'iew!"

He sighed with relief afterwards, encouraging Frisk to pick their head up and survey the damage. Papyrus's bleached-bone expression nonetheless managed to look a little flushed, a line of tears collecting on the edge of his eyesockets as he sniffled back the sluice of congestion. "Please excuse me. I am very tired of doing that."

Frisk signed another emphatic blessing, then made to stretch for the box of tissues on the coffee table. Their reach fell tragically short, although they weren't actually ready to climb off their gangly friend just yet. After watching Frisk strain for a few seconds, seemingly in a hearty attempt to extend their own fingers by a few inches, Papyrus took pity. One impressively long arm ventured out from beneath the blankets, plucking up the cardboard box and presenting it without ceremony to Frisk. The child sat back with simmering pleasure, willing to pretend that they'd managed it themself.

Did anyone else catch this? They signed, in between plucking out a pair of soft paper sheets and wadding them carefully together.

"Well," Papyrus hedged with reluctance, clearing his throat. "I... may have very accidentally passed it onto Undyne -- oh, thank you," he added as Frisk dabbed the tissues mindfully at his nasal bone. "She was, ah, displeased. So the very fearless, lionhearted Papyrus, who is definitely not afraid of his best friend... may be avoiding her." He squinted. "For now."

Frisk snickered, and made a mental notation to drop in on the ailing fish as well. She would probably forgive them if a tupperware of Toriel's garlic snail soup was included in the deal. The moment of amusement subsided into guilt again, as Papyrus took the tissues from them for a slightly more productive blow. If Undyne had it, then Alphys probably would too. Even Toriel had gotten a slight cough for her troubles, and only her speedy recovery kept Frisk from drowning with remorse. So far only Sans seemed unscathed, in the tight circle of their immediate friends.

I'm sorry, it's my fault, they signed. Patient Zero over here. Toriel hadn't really been thrilled at the zombie movie marathon they'd undertaken with Undyne. Privately Frisk thought that if they were going to suffer through nightmares, their reality in the Underground was better fodder than any make-believe and chocolate syrup special effects.

"Don't be silly!" Papyrus scolded, sitting up at last. Frisk spilled back into his lap, and blinked with surprise at the bare shape of his ribs and clavicle. It probably would have (and probably had) made some humans scream, but to Frisk he just looked oddly naked. Which was a little ridiculous for someone without skin. "I, the self-sacrificing and noble Papyrus, would gladly catch a hundred colds from you. No!" He narrowed his eyes. "A million."

The claim tempered Frisk back into a giggle. You have to get over this one first.

"An inevitability! Truthfully, I am feeling much better," Papyrus said, although he yielded to the pat of Frisk's hand against his manubrium and lay back down. "If still a bit tired."

You should get some sleep. Is it okay if I do my homework in the kitchen? Frisk signed, and received a yawning nod.

Once the skeleton had been tucked back in and some of the extra tissues cleared away, Frisk sent another text off to Toriel. 3:43 PM: Hanging out with the boneheads, will be back before dinner! I love you, they added as an afterthought, both because it was the truth, and to assuage the former queen's inevitable worries. They knew that Toriel was concerned about being smothering, but Frisk's biological parents had left such a void of attention in their life that it was kind of nice, if still a bit strange. Considering what they knew of Toriel's own former children, besides, Frisk was happy to be a little smothered.

They scrounged through the kitchen for a snack, but upon finding only containers full of cold pasta in the refrigerator -- of course -- they wrinkled their nose and reluctantly abandoned further procrastination. The take-home exercises for most of their subjects weren't particularly hard, although they were tedious. Math was unarguably their weakest subject, however, and they saved that for last, when Sans would be awake to help. It was difficult for many monsters to find work in the Overworld, most companies still too magic-shy to capitalize on the unique skills that they could offer, to say nothing of a healthy amount of specism. Papyrus's endless enthusiasm was quite popular at the gym Undyne had opened up, to the point where nobody really seemed to notice or mind a trainer that possessed no actual muscles. The elder skeleton, meanwhile, had been working an overnight security detail for a few months now, however, and slept through most of the day. Sometimes Frisk only caught him in passing, but there was a mutual understanding there. It was what it was, while they all figured this whole thing out.

Frisk was just getting around to staring down the confusing tangle of numbers, a pencil eraser fixed between their teeth, when a sound like a muffled explosion erupted from the second floor. They jumped in their chair, then crept cautiously out into living room, craning to source the noise. It apparently hadn't woken Papyrus, as the skeleton was still sacked out on the couch, sleeping like the dead. The exposed bones may have had something to do with that.

When silence persisted, Frisk gave a mental shrug and circled back around to retrieve their homework. Maybe Sans was doing some science experiments? Which meant he was awake. Which meant that Frisk could stop trying to wrap their head around polynomials and beg for help.

Their socked feet padded noiselessly down the carpeted hall. Just as they raised a fist to knock on Sans's door, however, the entire house shook.

Well, at least it felt like it had. The door definitely shuddered on its hinges and there was a brief blast of something brilliant and shining glaring out from its cracks, accompanied by a violent "h'uhASSSHOO!" from the other side.

Frisk froze, staring. When the moment passed, seemingly to no detriment to either the foundation of the house or the sleeping skeleton, they slowly, slowly tapped out a hesitant rhythm on the door. A friendly knock, but also one that hopefully inquired what the heck was that?

The door came open a few moments later, just when Frisk was contemplating a repeated sequence, to reveal Sans looking no worse for the wear. Almost. He was slouched into his usual, familiar jacket, hands pocketed and skull canted at a lazy angle. He was never not grinning, but this one seemed a particularly grinny grin, either because it was forced or because he was especially pleased to see Frisk. He usually was, but still.

"Hey, bucko. How was school?"

Uhm. Good! Frisk signed after a moment of surprise, trying to pinpoint what was off about their friend. What was that? Did you sneeze? They added a little drama to the gesture, for emphasis.

"Heh, yeah. Getting kind of dusty in there, I guess that's my cue to clean," Sans dismissed with an easy shrug, apparently unconcerned. "Whatcha got there, homework?"

Frisk nodded slowly. If you have time? They signed hopefully.

"Always."

They wondered when it was going to stop being odd, realizing how much room these monsters had made for them in their lives. Or how much they had made in turn.

Sans let them into the bedroom, in its usual state of complete disarray. Perhaps moreso than normal, actually. The papers usually scattered across his desk and bed -- ranging from grocery lists to blueprints for what seemed like impossible machines Frisk couldn't even begin to understand -- were now mostly on the floor. The blankets were hanging halfway off the mattress and onto the nearest lamp, and some of the laundry had managed to end up hanging haphazardly off the closet door. It didn't seem very dusty, though. Frisk blinked.

Did a tornado come through? They joked.

"Somethin' like that," Sans chuckled good-naturedly. He hopped himself up onto the edge of the desk, one leg folded up to expose the bare tibia, and gestured to the chair. "Plant it, kiddo. Let's see what we're working with."

I hate math, Frisk lamented as they spread out their equations across the now conveniently-empty desk, with the exception of one skeleton.

"Heh, I used to hate it too, but then I realized that decimals had a point." Sans flashed one eye an in exaggerated wink. Frisk slapped their forehead in groaning dismay.

Awful. So awful.

"You practically set me up for it," Sans chuckled. His speaking voice was always deep and even, a counterpoint to his brother's wild vacillations. Today, however, Frisk wondered if there wasn't a little more gravel in it than usual. They wondered, too, if that was something that could pass off from being recently woken, as the skeleton yawned, or something more ominous. Guilt crept in slow around the edges of their heart. Maybe if they didn't mention it, it wouldn't be true.

Okay, so I started with this one, and now I'm not sure where to go from here, they began, as Sans leaned over to track their progress. It was probably a little weird, being loomed over by a skeleton with inexplicable powers, the magic that Frisk had barely gotten a taste of but sometimes thought they knew or... remembered all too well. It was a strange flux of feelings, but the foundation of them was still a persistent sense of comfort. Sans was nothing if not protective.

Even, it seemed, when he needed to protect Frisk from himself. As they detailed their thought process in slow, uncertain signs, the skeleton began to lean back again, blinking in a funny, hesitating fashion. When it became clear that his focus had faded elsewhere, Frisk paused. A curled hand flicked into three fingers angled outwards, as they tilted their head at the skeleton. You okay?

"Uh," Sans said warily. "Yeah, I just... s-sit tight for a minute, okay kid? I promise I won't let you get hurt."

Frisk stared, then repeated their earlier gesture with a slightly longer, wobbling pause on the first sign. Ooookay?

Sans took a breath, then another, turning his head away as a splay of fingerbones curled towards his face. Frisk's revelation came just in time to brace themself, just as the monster let out an enormous, "huhAASSHHHoo!"

The effect was a little like a bomb detonating, minus the fiery explosion. Instead, a concussive blast of light and energy rolled through the room from the centerpoint of Sans's body, throwing anything weighing less than a hundred pounds or so flying through the air. Frisk was included in the projectiles, along with the chair they were still death-gripping in both hands. A scream was trying to unstick from their throat, but by then it was already over, and they were hovering suspended in mid-air, caught by an aura of blue magic. Sans had a hand extended to stay them in place, and his left eye was a bright and brilliant blue. Frisk swallowed.

"Whew, sorry about that," Sans said with a sniff, as he lowered chair and child back into place. The sheet of math problems along with the pencil had flown halfway across the room. "Had a little tickle."

Little? Frisk repeated through nervous laughter, hands shaking. Jeez! Bless you, does that always happen?

"Nah, not usually. My magic's been acting up today."

Frisk frowned. How come? They signed, although something deep and dreading felt as though they already knew the answer.

Sans likely did as well, but his shrug was careless as could be. "No clue. Magic's weird that way. Don't worry about it, I'll get a handle on it."

Frisk chewed on their lower lip for a moment, hands still, then finally, guiltily signed out an obvious lead-in. Does it act up when you're sick?

Sans's permanent grin grew a little tenser, by Frisk's estimation. "I wouldn't know, bud, I don't get sick."

Frisk looked dubious. Papyrus did, they signed pointedly.

Sans shrugged, and passed a forefinger across the shape where his nose would be, were it not simply a hollow recession up into his sinuses. Frisk wondered if rubbing made it feel better. They knew firsthand that the skeletons' bones were sensitive to touch, the way their own skin was. It had seemed rude to ask too many probing questions about their anatomy, even if either brother would have no doubt humored them.

"Papyrus is Papyrus," he said simply, though it was tailgated with another sniffle that sounded surprisingly fluid. Another mystery for the books, Frisk supposed. They'd seen him sweat and tear up before, a runny non-nose wasn't so strange by comparison.

Once Sans had fixed himself to an idea, it could take a while before he let it go. Frisk was filled with far more determination, however, and was content to wait this one out. Well... if you're done? They signed, as they rose to retrieve their blown-away homework.

"Heh, I'm good. I'll let you know if I feel another coming on."

That he thought it a distinct possibility only supported Frisk's not-so-sneaking suspicions, but they uncreased the paper sheet and brought it back to the desk anyway. Sans was an ever patient teacher, with a knack for intuiting Frisk's favored learning styles. The equations splayed out before them gained some purpose and context when Sans demonstrated the smooth, beautiful lines they could make when graphed out. The abundance of math puns that he'd apparently been saving up for a rainy day didn't hurt, either.

They had already broken down some of the more initially-bewildering problems and were nearly finished with the sheet when Sans took to itching a knuckle at the thin septum of his nose again. Frisk smiled and wriggled their fingers over their chin. Tickle?

"Gettin' there," he chuckled, then nodded towards the homework. "Got the gist of it, short stack?"

Frisk nodded, but smirked as they signed a pointed, I'm going to be taller than you, soon.

"Exactly why you should let me enjoy this now." He sniffed through a delicate grimace, then patted the desk beside him. "Why don't you uh... c-come up here, munchkin. This might work a little be-HH!" He held one digit against his nasal bone for a second, eyesockets welling up with irritation, then shakily relaxed. "...little better."

Frisk clambered hesitantly up onto the desk beside him, then seemed to glean the idea and ducked under the skeleton's arm in a snug embrace. Better to be at the eye of the storm rather than hope that Sans recovered in time. Plus, they never minded getting a hug from their bony buddy. Frisk pressed their temple to where they could feel the head of his humerus, under the jacket, and listen to him breathe deeply, deeply...

"--uh'AHSSHHHOO!"

The force of it rattled his bones against each other with a series of rattling click-clacks, the sound like the chatter of ivory dice being tossed in the palm. Despite the shockwave of energy that once again sent their homework fluttering through the air, however, Frisk remain locked tight to his arm with eyes screwed shut against the flashing brilliance. When the white-blue burn receded from behind their eyelids, they pried first one open and then the other, taking stock of the damage. Sans was rubbing his nasal bone with a sigh.

"Jeez," he remarked, then shot Frisk an expectant look, halfway to a glare if not for the absence of any real heat behind it. "Well? Where's my bless you?"

Frisk snorted an anxious laugh, then signed a very firm blessing that concluded with a sidelong squeeze, delighting in the grunt it earned. You should rest, they added afterwards. Call off work tonight.

"This magnificent wardrobe and all that pet rock food doesn't pay for itself, kiddo," Sans remarked, brow bones knit. "Anyway, much as I love doing nothing, what for?"

Frisk made a slight face, and finally put a proverbial foot down. You, they announced, with a finger poking into Sans's shoulder, have a cold. A pause, before lamenting, My cold, so. I'm sorry about that.

Sans guttered out another laugh, before tightening his hold on them and grinding a merciless noogie into Frisk's hair, despite their flail of protest. "That's what you're worried about? I'm fine, ya little goober."

Frisk at last managed to squirm out from his grip with a gasp, before firmly pouncing the snickering skeleton and pushing their hands up under his shirt. Sans choked on an inhale, with a protest of "that's cheating!" before they both tumbled off the desk and into a pile of rearranged laundry. Frisk maintained their assault, fingers skimming over and in between his ribs mercilessly as Sans writhed in place, mindful not to pinch their fingers between his bones but helpless to resist the reaction. "Kid, kid, c'mon, not fair!" He wheezed out, in between laughs. Only once they became soundless and rattling in his chest did Frisk finally sit up and back, glowing with triumph.

The victory was short lived, as Sans's recovery breaths soon turned over into heady inhales and a hand pressing up against his face. Hastily, Frisk ducked back down and hugged themself to his whole chest as it swelled, squeezing their eyes shut to feel Sans's opposite arm curl around their back.

"--h'ASSHHHHoo!!"

The forced of it shattered the overhead light, and in the dimness that followed, listening to the sounds of glass patter softly down, Frisk gave their friend's side a little rub. Bless you, they signed, by the ethereal light of Sans's eye. You really are sick. Please?

"Kid..." Sans began to protest, until they sat up and headed him off at the pass with an angry sign.

I've never heard you sneeze before! And now all this in an hour? Sans... Frisk finger-spelled out his name for trailing weight.

Sans simpered up at them, the glow of his eye slowly receding. "Buddy, you're just gonna have to take my word for it that I have, in fact, sneezed before. Sometimes even more than once in a day," he said, giving the impression of raising his brows playfully without actually possessing any.

As he sat up to flick on a lamp, Frisk scowled. If you don't take care of yourself, I'm gonna have to start fighting dirty.

"Oh yeah?" The skeleton mused, picking them both up and dusting himself off. He was clearly unconcerned by the threat. "How'sat? I mean you already tickled me half to death, I dunno how much more brutal you can get."

Frisk narrowed their eyes at him. I'm going to tell Mom you've got a big, fat crush on her.

Sans turned an immediate and telling shade of brilliant blue, caught off guard as he huddled down into his hood. Frisk tried not to preen. Realistically, they were pretty sure that everyone but Toriel knew as much, and were even surer that the feeling was mutual. That was something they could work out on their own, however. For now, it was a nice bit of leverage.

"J-jeez, kid! You weren't kidding about playing dirty," Sans lamented, as he rubbed a hand over his vertebral processes with a rasping clatter. "Okay, okay. I might be comin' down with a little tiny bitty something. But don't you dare get all guilty on me," he warned, as Frisk's self-satisfied expression already began to crumple. "Stuff happens, y'know?"

Yeah, I know, they sighed, leaning forward to clunk their forehead gently against Sans's skull. But it still sucks. You guys have all been so good to me and...

"We've been good to you?" Sans sounded incredulous, and put a careful hand in their mussed hair. "Kid, we owe you everything. But it's not even about that, huh? We love you. You've gotta know that."

Frisk did know that, but hearing it voiced so plainly still made a horrifying heat well up behind their eyes. The nightmares of another timeline and another self, when Sans wasn't looking at them so fondly, had far from abated. Every day, in fact, the idea that this was all some elaborate ruse and that any tiny infraction could shatter this peace was a low-grade paranoia buzzing in the back of their brain. How, after all, could they deserve this, when so many humans that had come before them did not? In the next breath, they were choking back a miserably exultant sound and plunging into the skeleton's arms.

"Whoa, whoa, okay," Sans murmured through a nagging sniffle. His hand threaded through Frisk's hair, parting the sloppy waves of it with genuine and tender affection. "Don't got gettin' all mushy on me." He made no attempt to disentangle himself, however, instead letting the steady hum of magic through his bones settle the frantic pitch of Frisk's breath. "Easy, tiger."

When the surge of emotion had played itself out, Frisk slumped against him as if they'd just donated a pint of blood, spent. Sans squeezed their shoulder. "If it makes you feel better, I'll text work and you can put my grumpy butt to bed. How's that?" A steady nod confirmed his suggestion.

When the Overworld equivalent of sentry duty had been begged off, and Sans had reluctantly shunted his huge jacket to be fussed back into bed, Frisk made a slight show of straightening out the blankets. Possibly for the first time in months. When the bemused skeleton was well-secured, however, they clambered up onto the mattress next to them and pressed a cheek into his shoulder.

"Ah, kid," Sans mourned. "You're killin' me."

They lay like that for a while, Sans beginning to slowly drift while Frisk listened to the intermittent tug of his sniffling or the occasional, half-stifled cough. It kept occurring to them to get up and fetch some tissues before Papyrus burned through them all, or to make a fresh pot of tea. But Sans was a warm, comforting weight, and he smelled faintly of petrichor and tomatoes, and Frisk's eyes were heavy with the rhythm of his simulated breathing.

When they stirred again, the digital clock on the wall registered another hour gone, and their phone was shrieking with an incoming call. Frisk fumbled it from a pocket, panicked and palm-sweaty, before finally managing to mash speaker phone and give Sans's shoulder a good shake.

"Frisk!" Toriel was fretting on the other line. "You said you'd be home before dinner! What on earth..."

"Sorry, T," Sans got out through an enormous yawn half-muffled against his metacarpals. "The kiddo's with me, we lost track of time."

The panic seemed to flee from Toriel's voice as she reassessed the situation and sighed out her fear, shakily. Frisk felt terrible. "I... I see, well that is good to hear. Are... are they staying the night?"

"Nah, I'll send 'em packing. Wouldn't want them to miss your... whatcha makin'?"

"Oh! I found a recipe for vegetarian lasagna on the internet! I had to make a few substitutions but..." Frisk rolled their eyes and readjusted their position again Sans, who was tilting in towards the phone with a big, stupid grin that he clearly was unaware of. As Toriel continued to ramble happily away, however, they noticed some of that blissed-out pleasure begin to rupture. The quiver of something in their friend's nose was all too apparent to Frisk, but Toriel went on unaware until Sans was hauling in a shaky breath and twisting into a fold of his blankets.

"--huh'RHHHSSHHoo!" He muffled, with equal parts force and effort. Frisk had locked their little hands tight to his chest at the first hint of an unsteady ripple in his magic. To their mingled surprise, however, the fissure in his control began and ended at one dully glowing blue eye. He blinked it away again, sniffling.

"Goodness, bless you! Oh, Sans, I hope you haven't caught this awful thing too..."

The skeleton had flushed over into a less intense, but still happily embarrassed tint of blue, rubbing at his jaw. "Aw, um. It's nothin', don't worry about it, T. Hey," he protested gently, as Frisk took to prodding him in the ribs with plain delight.

"Nonsense. I'm going to make another batch of soup and bring you some tomorrow, straightaway."

"Aw, T, you don't have to do that. I--... I mean I'm sure gonna appreciate it, if you do, but..."

"Soup and a pie, and... oh, what else..."

Once they'd minced through their awkward, fond goodbyes, Frisk pocketed the phone and fished up their homework from the sneeze-induced chaos of Sans's bedroom.

"Got enough to go on, there?" He prompted, without getting up. Frisk nodded, as he smothered another yawn. "M'kay, call if you get stuck."

I will anyway, to check on you and Papyrus. Feel better, Frisk signed, then leaned over to peck a small kiss to Sans's brow, earning a different kind of quiet fluster.

"Thanks for keeping an eye on these old bones, kid," Sans murmured. As Frisk showed themself to the bedroom door, and then crept out past a miraculously still-sleeping Papyrus, they decided that for their friends, too, it must have been worth it. All of it.

In the moment, that was enough for them to hold on to.

Edited November 14, 2015 by Garnet

[meepsy]

GARNET ARE YOU TRYIN TO KILL ME???? Because holy shit i did not think this was possible, but here you are proving me wrong in the absolute best way conceivable!! I have not actually squealed aloud while reading a fic in quite some time, but this dang thing is just so ADORABLE and PERFECT, and well, let's just say it's a good thing no one else is home yet, or else i would have had some explaining to do!!

I'm gonna quote you my faves, but first i want to say that i am still just reeling over how incredibly in character everyone is, like down to a tee! And ohmygosh Friiiiiiiiisk :heart: !!!! I am so fond of the idea of them communicating through signing, it really does suit their character so well!!

Okay. :megalovania starts playing: Here we go.

Guilt was a wellspring bubbling up in Frisk's core as they regarded the tableau of misery before them.

I AM ALREADY DEAD WITH THESE WORD CHOICES. Wellspring? core?? you have been writing Undertale for years already, haven't you? You've got time powers, don't you? There is no other explanation JUST ADMIT TO IT ALREADY.

"Tiny human," he greeted in a croak. A rough clear of the imaginary throat did little to improve his tone. "You have returned from the perils of your education."

I squealed at this part, (the first of many squeals.) PAPYRUS!!!!!!!!! How is it possible for someone to be this excited about a talking skeleton??? The world is full of mysteries I guess

With an idea of where this was heading, Frisk braced themself in place, just as Papyrus pressed into the back of the couch and sneezed mightily.

"--H'ESSHHH'iew!"

Despite their precautionary measures, Frisk nearly toppled from their roost with the force of it. A bony hand swept out from beneath the blankets at the last moment, righting them quickly in place.

Another squeal, complete with hands pressed to face with sheer and utter OMGGGGGG! Like, I am still havin a hard time believing this is a real true thing in front of my eyes. IT IS TOO GOOD HOW????

"Excellent! I feel the same, in spite of this hideous... what did you call it?"

A headcold, Frisk giggled.

"Yes, horrible stuff! I can't imagine how humans go through this nonsense every season, it's little wonder you're so strong," he diatribed playfully, with a poke of a finger to the baby fat on Frisk's side. They jerked with another laugh, fueling the skeleton's fire. "Where does it all come from, that's what I'd like to know. I don't even have a nose and it's acting up most disobediently. It's snot very amusing, and ugh, ugh, I already hate myself for that pun. Please don't tell Sans."

I AM CRYING. It is too good. It doesn't stop being so goddang too good for words. The pun and the bit right after???? STOP. PLZ HAVE MERCY. (<-- )

[BananaTree]

This is so damn adorable I can't even. I have no words. Except you are an excellent writer! This was beautiful in every way. I'm not sure if you want to keep going but I wouldn't complain if you did! If this is what the ending of this game ends up being, I simply. MUST. SEE IT. Damn you, favorite youtuber for not playing it fast enough!

Srsly...this was amazebawls. You rock!

[•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•]

GARNET THIS IS WONDERFUL AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING AND OH MY GO S H #WRITING GOALS

[meepsy]

Part Two (bc i hit the post button accidentally!)

Once the skeleton had been tucked back in and some of the extra tissues cleared away, Frisk sent another text off to Toriel. 3:43 PM: Hanging out with the boneheads, will be back before dinner! I love you, they added as an afterthought, both because it was the truth, and to assuage the former queen's inevitable worries. They knew that Toriel was concerned about being smothering, but Frisk's biological parents had left such a void of attention in their life that it was kind of nice, if still a bit strange. Considering what they knew of Toriel's own former children, besides, Frisk was happy to be a little smothered.

This pulled my heartstrings so!!! Toriel!!! (i am so ashamed about what i have done now!!!! )

The door came open a few moments later, just when Frisk was contemplating a repeated sequence, to reveal Sans looking no worse for the wear. Almost. He was slouched into his usual, familiar jacket, hands pocketed and skull canted at a lazy angle. He was never not grinning, but this one seemed a particularly grinny grin, either because it was forced or because he was especially pleased to see Frisk. He usually was, but still.

"Hey, bucko. How was school?"

SANS!!!! Augh jeez oh dang how am i this excited hoooowww??? I have such intense feelings about this game i need to catch my breath omgomg

"Heh, I used to hate it too, but then I realized that decimals had a point." Sans flashed one eye an in exaggerated wink. Frisk slapped their forehead in groaning dismay.

please... i can't take anymore... I can't, I...

"Uh," Sans said warily. "Yeah, I just... s-sit tight for a minute, okay kid? I promise I won't let you get hurt."

Frisk stared, then repeated their earlier gesture with a slightly longer, wobbling pause on the first sign. Ooookay?

Sans took a breath, then another, turning his head away as a splay of fingerbones curled towards his face. Frisk's revelation came just in time to brace themself, just as the monster let out an enormous, "huhAASSHHHoo!"

How protective he is? and how describe the lilt of Frisk's signing???? If i'm not careful i'm gonna quote this whole thing back at you, but honestly, you are not leavin me much of a choice!!!

When the Overworld equivalent of sentry duty had been begged off, and Sans had reluctantly shunted his huge jacket to be fussed back into bed, Frisk made a slight show of straightening out the blankets. Possibly for the first time in months. When the bemused skeleton was well-secured, however, they clambered up onto the mattress next to them and pressed a cheek into his shoulder.

"Ah, kid," Sans mourned. "You're killin' me."

I love that he is a security guard. I love that he loses control of his magic. I love... ALL OF IT.

"Goodness, bless you! Oh, Sans, I hope you haven't caught this awful thing too..."

The skeleton had flushed over into a less intense, but still happily embarrassed tint of blue, rubbing at his jaw. "Aw, um. It's nothin', don't worry about it, T. Hey," he protested gently, as Frisk took to prodding him in the ribs with plain delight.

"Nonsense. I'm going to make another batch of soup and bring you some tomorrow, straightaway."

"Aw, T, you don't have to do that. I--... I mean I'm sure gonna appreciate it, if you do, but..."

"Soup and a pie, and... oh, what else..."

Please, you can't expect me to go on like this!! But I will. The existence of a cute embarrassed skeleton is filling me with such DETERMINATION.

In the moment, that was enough for them to hold on to.

AAAWAAUGH nope i am dead i am dead of feels there is no coming back. *reload screen pops up* Oh shit. Okay.

What else can I possibly say except excuse you for writing this perfect, wonderful too-good-to-be-true Undertale fic right off the bat and giving me heart palpitations with its beauty???? Like honestly!!!! I have such a love it is unreal!!!

*Give hug to GARNET and thank her for being fukken amazing as per usual?*

{ } yes { } no

Edited November 14, 2015 by meepsy

[Spoo]

Spooky, sneezy skeletons send shivers down your spine...

Um. Yeah. WOW. Everything about this was perfect and in-character and extremely well-written?? GOOD JOB. PAPAPAP

also you should illustrate the frick out of this just sayin'

[Mr. Black Cherry Berry Tea]

Hi just want to join the chorus this is perfection from heaven and the sun.

[bloom]

*deep breath* Okay I'm ready to read and give a running commentary now. Prepare for LONGEVITY

HERE WE GO:

First, Frisk communicating through sign language? Stroke of brilliance, I love how it completely keeps to the canon of them not actually speaking. (Coming back to the beginning of the post to add how much I love the way you actually describe the way they're signing, too - really really excellent, WTF.)

oh no, Papyrus

"It's snot very amusing, and ugh, ugh, I already hate myself for that pun. Please don't tell Sans."

"She was, ah, displeased. So the very fearless, lionhearted Papyrus, who is definitely not afraid of his best friend... may be avoiding her." He squinted. "For now."

"I, the self-sacrificing and noble Papyrus, would gladly catch a hundred colds from you. No!" He narrowed his eyes. "A million."

oh no, oh no. I'm incoherent. I just love this fucking skeleton so much and you wrote him so well, please kill me.

They scrounged through the kitchen for a snack, but upon finding only containers full of cold pasta in the refrigerator -- of course

FUCKIN'. literal snort-laughter.

God dammit if I quote everything I want to this comment will be five miles long. Sans losing control of his magic, Sans making shitty puns as per usu, the reference to the genocide route, Sans demanding to be blessed lmfao, I am dying, okay. And everybody is so in-character but Toriel's just the best from the little bit of dialogue she has here, ahhhhhh!!!

Whep. I didn't think I'd ever read any Undertale fanfic because the game is very complete to me but then your ass had to toss up THIS and to be honest, I am feeling weirdly emotional about it because I just love these characters so fucking much and you did them justice and then some. Basically, I am completely ruined now, but in the best way possible, and I am so glad that you wrote this.

[Arty]

I heard of this game on tumblr and while I never played it, I like this Sans character. And I love this.

[mariaib]

oh my god this is the first sneeze fic of undertale that i see.. and its great!! i've already seen other works from you! and you have a loads of talent!! i love it!

[Dynein]

Holy crapping crap, Garnet. THIS IS PERFECT. I'm gonna second everything Junia and Meepsy already said, because they said it far more eloquently than I could. Papyrus is perfect, Frisk is perfect, Toriel is perfect. OMFG, SANS THO. Losing control of his magic and trying to deny he's sick, and

"Papyrus is Papyrus," he said simply, though it was tailgated with another sniffle that sounded surprisingly fluid.

THIS!!! You're killin' me, Smalls. As bad as I feel for asking, is there any more on the horizon? I'd love to see your take on Sans bein' completely in the grip of this thing like Papyrus.

Edited November 15, 2015 by Dynein

[sauce]

This is so, so, so good. I could say more, but I was a little late to the party. Everything I could have said has been said. But I still wanted to comment just to say tHIS IS SO GOOD.

[Garnet]

Comment replies! Because it's been forever since I did some.

@ Meepsy - The hecke I am! This is a weird and lowkey embarrassing venture for me as well, but seeing the positive response soothes my frazzled nerves. Especially with your in-depth commentary! Also yes, yes, FEEL BAD about your ruthless Toriel murder. TBH I'm still cracking up at your low-key, unintentional No Mercy run. "I've been... pretty murder-y..."

You've got time powers, don't you? There is no other explanation JUST ADMIT TO IT ALREADY.

Ohoho. If I did, they would have been used to reset the finances of my college years :|

*Give hug to GARNET and thank her for being fukken amazing as per usual?*

{ } yes { } no

This delights me on a fucking ridiculous level. HUFF

@ BananaTree - Oh, thank you! I have some vague inclinations to keep going, based on a few tumblr asks, but I am forever wary of running something into the ground. Less is more, you know? Although in this instance, perhaps more is more Thank you for the commentary, and I highly suggest that you play through the game for yourself!

@Quing Nerd - Thank you for this AND your running commentary! My tiny soul can only take so much

@Spoo - Riiight? Not exactly a territory I expected to re-visit on the yearly but hell, it is what it is? It's in the works bruh.

@Mr. T - FRICKIN' GOOD. I forgot that this would even appeal to you, but now that I have recollected, prepare thyself for a continuation. Also, you should just play it anyway

@Junia - Oh lord, the embarrassment and pleasure of this comment is nearly too much. I only get commentary from you on a whim, so it's a bit fluster-ing but also flattering and also yes, hello, thank you for your thoughts. I am forever torn between writing Paps doing the actual THING (but having little sexual desire behind it, it's just fun and cute but also exciting) and also answering to my weird fetish Id.

Also, regarding the in-character factor: FRICK I'm just winging this but I'm so glad it came across okay! Also also, I agree. I almost don't want to touch fandom because the game in itself is too fun and good and pure, buuut I also want to do weird fetish nonsense, so that's an odd line to straddle.

@Artygirl - You should! It's ten dollars on Steam and absolutely worth it. Thanks for reading!

@mariaib - Oh gosh, what a compliment. Thank you!

@Dynein - Ohhhh you Thank you thank you! I am... to no one's great surprise, a big fan of loss-of-control-while-sick/sneezing. Based on this and your tumblr mail I certainly have a follow-up cooking, so thank you!

@Pirka - That's alright! I appreciate every comment, no matter how glancing or in-depth. Feed my dang ol' ego

Edited November 16, 2015 by Garnet

[Snapdragon]

Oh my god, this is perfection. Sweet and funny and heartachy in all the best ways (and the PUNS!) :')

[Marlett]

Okay it's confession time. This story is the reason I finally joined the forum. I couldn't stop myself I just HAD to reply to this.

There is nothing about this I don't like. It's perfect. Ever since I started to play it I have been frantically searching the internet for an undertale sneezefic and this is the only one I've found. For now, it's the only one I need. The way you wrote Frisk is incredible. You reflected them perfectly and it murders me with happiness. Don't even get me started on the skelebros! I can't stand it, I don't know how a calcium structure can catch a cold, but you made it work. Papyrus...wow. Now THAT was adorable. You wrote him perfectly and I can't deal with it. And Sans, I'm vibrating happily. That dialogue, those puns! All of it made me melt. The sneezes from both of them are A+. I'm in awe. If there's more undertale coming I will await it eagerly. I can just imagine Papyrus and Sans cuddling together in a ball of misery, surrounded by used tissues. Thank you so much!

[LP]

Man, I know this is so long ago, but I recently finished playing the game (pacifist run) and I had seen this story earlier, so I made a note to come back to it and oooooooooh my god! I absolutely loved this!!!!

How something can be so unbelievably hot and cute at the same time is beyond me. I just, I have no words.

Everything about this story is just Ah! Perfect! I loved Papyrus, he's so adorable and his dialogue is just so him! And then Sans, I seriously wasn't expecting sneezes from him but as soon as that first sneeze happened I was so happy and excited that more were to come.

And just wow, the interactions with the characters is amazing! So realistic to what they would act like! It's all just so lovely! I'm literally in a pile of fan girl goo right now.

Just, I can't. It's too good.

[Vongola Undicesimo]

I don't think I saw this when it was originally posted, but now that I've seen it I can't help but comment on JUST HOW CUTE THIS IS. Seriously, sneezing skeleton bros will be the death of me.

[Chiller, a sneezy skeleton]

Please write more

[Chi]

PLEASE CONTINUE! This is amazing! And now I'll spend the rest of my day in a coma from reading too good an UNDERTALE fic...

[SweaterWeather]

*takes a deep breath* Yep, I'm in love with a skeleton. Hhhh, this was so wonderful, Garnet. I mean seriously, you have the characters down to a TEE, the t standing for terrific and also terribly feelsy (I mean just the TITLE had me going "Oh no.." and also "Oh yeeeessss~" ) But I mean, Sans... Sans..

SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANS

Guh, I appreciate him so much more than when I first looked through what the game was about. And some fan art just depicts him so... Uh, well, ahem. In a very pleasing to the eyes light. So thinking of him flushed blue with a fever/chills/drippy nose cavity kind of gives me the Tem shakes. Also ADORABLE FRISK I CANNOT CARING FOR HER BONY BUDDIES LIKE A SAINT UGH

Anyway, this made no sense and I apologize for being completely "fndgnsijfs" but, this is wonderful, you're wonderful, Undertale is pain and also joy of joys in my life right now, and this made my love for it grow about ten times more BLESS YOUR BRAIN.

[mysterysneeze]

Hi there Garnet!  It's been a long time. I remember a music video with a skeleton that had some sneezy things done with him, and there's good reasons why skeletons have such an interesting concept that makes for a really fun and enjoyable thing. I still haven't played Undertale, but I have seen the boss fight videos and music. 

Something I notice is how in character these characters are. Also, how did you come up with so many clever and fun puns? I love puns, but they're hard for me to write sometimes ^^;

[FairyDust]

I confess I've never heard of Undertale (though its definitely something I'll be looking into now!), but your writing is amazing enough that I was still able to follow. This was utterly brilliant, I love how it progressed and the whole thing was just perfect.

[Vanilla]

This is so cute! I love characters like Sans who always deny when they're sick. Plus, your style is brilliant.

[RachTheCool]

Ohhh im so mad. This is the closest I've ever gotten to seeing a sick undyne. And i need one. Someone make this happen!

[Secret Sneezer]

I absolutely adore this! I can't wait to read more!