Chartreuse Is The Colour Of Misery (Maleficent)

[Chanel_no5]

***Note***

Behold! I have finally finished the last of my unfinished fics. Work in progress is such a monkey on the back, n’est-ce pas? With this, I’m taking a hiatus from writing fetish fiction on the forum for a while. Real life and non-fetish writing assignments pile up on me.

This is a Maleficent fic (what a surprise, huh?) with no plot other than, well, she’s allergic… and if you squint at it in a dark room, you might see a hint at Maleval in it.

And a great big giant and a great big giant for my amazing Beta Devil Bird, for pointing out my mistakes and for patiently explaining to me why they are mistakes. Thank you!

Now, let’s take a trip to the Moors an early spring morning…

***

The sun was not yet above the horizon, but the very air seemed to promise a wonderful spring day in the Moors. It was warm for late April, and a light breeze combed through the grass and rustled the trees until the heavy, bursting catkins spilled their treasure: an abundance of greenish yellow pollen.

A thin veil of glittering pollen, lit by the first rays of the rising sun, rained down on a certain sleeping fairy and dusted her face with the innocent plant powder. As she inhaled, these tiny seeds of misery got stuck inside her nose. Some made it all the way into her sinuses and the back of her throat, causing her sensitive mucous membranes to swell and itch. Her allergic reaction had only just begun, and it would keep working on her while she was sleeping. Her eyes began to water. Her nose began to itch, and, without waking up, she brought a hand up and rubbed at it. Her nose was already taking on a pinkish shade in protest of this invasion of irritants. By now she sniffled with each inhale, and as the congestion grew thicker, the sniffling breaths turned into light snores. Her bird companion heard the sound and moved away a little bit. Only to be out of spraying range, he told himself, knowing from experience what would happen when she woke up.

More pollen rained down on her and covered her black robes with a fine chartreuse dust. Maleficent slept on, blissfully unaware of the torture that awaited her.

***

She was in the odd fleeting state between sleep and awareness, and as she slowly rose up towards consciousness, she became acutely aware of one physical sensation. Or, rather, a physical irritation. Her nose itched. No, 'itched' was too mild a word; it felt like her nose was on fire. It felt like she was about to sneeze. Her breathing turned into irregular hitches.

“Huuhhh… huuuh-uh….”

She sniffled wetly and ran a hand under her nostrils. She wasn’t entirely awake yet, but her nose, desperate to get rid of what tormented it, had decided to run its own race. And it was getting her lungs to play along.

“Hhhhahhh… “

All of a sudden the shallow gasps turned into a deep, harsh inhale - and she woke up at the very moment the build-up reached the point of no return.

“HAAAEEESSSCHHHH!”

The sneeze was so violent; she was on the verge of falling out of the tree. She sneezed again, unable to help it.

“Heeh-uh-iyESSCHuh! AaaKTSCCHOO!”

Instead of doing anything to soothe the tingle, the sneezes seemed to increase it. Her nose felt red-hot, inflamed with a torturous prickle that made her want to do nothing but sneeze and sneeze, and then sneeze some more. She nearly choked trying to catch her breath between the powerful, messy explosions.

“HEAASCCHOO! HaRSSSCCHHO!”

It was cruel irony that she should suffer from this condition every year when the trees released their pollen - she, who healed trees. It was almost laughably unfair, but there was nothing she could do about it. Magic didn’t help, and while she knew about a few herbal potions that helped matters a little, she had forgotten to plan ahead and make some. Spring always seem to catch her unprepared.

Her nose burned and itched, her eyes felt like they were filled with sand, and her sinuses felt so blocked that she could not breathe. Not that she could breathe anyway, not with all this incessant sneezing.

“EyyiiSSCCH! ISSCCH! YiSSCChuh-ahhISSCCH!”

As she struggled to find her handkerchief, she felt her nose dripping onto her upper lip. It was so disgusting that she wanted to whimper. She finally got the cloth out, covered her mouth and nose, and was just about to blow her nose and rid it of as much of the irritants and discharge as possible when instead she doubled over with a rapid-fire fit so intense that she couldn’t even draw a single breath between each sneeze.

“Huh-gTSSCH-iggTSScchh-ayiSSCCH-ISCCHAH-uuh!”

When he saw her nose was safely covered with the handkerchief, Diaval flew down to his Mistress and cawed. She didn’t even notice his presence, as she was far too busy sneezing.

“HeeIISSCH-ktSSCCH-tSSCCHoo-arrgh!”

If Diaval had been in his human form he would have chuckled. She was clearly infuriated. If she hadn’t been unable to form coherent words, she would probably put a curse on someone. Or turn him into an earthworm. He shuddered at the thought and his desire to chuckle faded.

He nudged her gently. Maleficent sneezed, sniffled, sneezed again, and then somehow managed to catch her breath and crack swollen, reddening eyelids open to glare at him.

“W-wh… what… uhh… is it y-you-huuuhhh… want?” She sniffled wetly and stifled two sneezes. Tears streamed down her cheeks.

He tilted his head to the side in a gesture that was compassionate and questioning at the same time. As a bird, that was all he could do to offer his sympathies and ask what the matter was. Maleficent struggled to get her breathing under control so she could speak, but had to surrender to the brutal fact that now wasn't a time she would be able to speak a whole sentence, however short, without hitching, sniffling or sneezing her way through it. And so she settled for the hand motion. Diaval turned human and he wasted no time.

“What is the matter, Mistress?”

Maleficent aimed for a contemptuous laugh, but only got to ‘ha’ before it transformed into a sneeze. At best, you could call it a contemptuous sneeze.

“I’m s-sn-sneezing… huhhh-eyISSCH! EyISSSCCH! HuYIESSCCHAH! Sneezing my horns off, I… hayEESCCHh! I thought that was obvious! HegtSSCCHiugh!”

“Yes, but…” Diaval fidgeted. He was well aware that he probably would regret this in one way or the other, but nevertheless, he steeled himself and finished: “But why?”

Maleficent held the handkerchief firmly to her face with one hand and ran the palm of her other hand over the dust that covered her clothes. She raised her hand to show Diaval all the chartreuse powder that stuck to it.

“Pollen?” he said.

“Allergic,” Maleficent croaked before launching into a fiercely stifled fit that left her head throbbing and her sinuses burning.

“Is there anything I can do?” Diaval asked. He hadn’t noticed that he had put a hand on her shoulder. Maleficent did, but she chose not to mention it. Besides, the comfort felt good.

“Yes.”

He waited. Maleficent blew her nose and wiped the moisture from her glowing red nostrils before removing the soaked handkerchief from her face.

“Get more handkerchiefs. A lot of them.”

“Yes, Mistress.”

“And Diaval?” Her voice was so hoarse it barely carried.

“Yes?”

“Thank you for staying. I know sneezing bothers you.”

“It’s alright. You can’t help it.”

He saw the tortured, desperate look creep back into her face and he smiled a little. This was the fairy they called the Mistress of All Evil...weak and messy. He had never loved her more than he did right now. Suddenly aware that he was blushing, he quickly turned away.

“I’m getting those handkerchiefs.”

As he left, Maleficent glared at her pollen-covered hand with pure hatred. Normally she loved all colours in nature, but this one, this one deserved nothing but disgust. Chartreuse was the colour of misery.

Edited October 12, 2014 by Chanel_no5

[ValkyriePleasant]

Maleval

[Wildwood]

Devil Beta is proud to be so! I loved this fic especially because:

Maleval

This. When I'm not dying of feels because Malora, I'm drooling over Maleval.

Once again, fantastic job! You deserve your well-earned break, but I'm sure we'll all rejoice when you decide to return!

[count tiszula]

Another lovely story from the Mistress of the sneezy dominatrix. I trust this will be a very short retirement from the lists.

This must be yellow Chartreuse, I take it.......

[a_nonny_mouse]

Adskjfklasjdlak. Lovely once again. Chanel, you write allergic misery like no one else alive, and over the years I've come to take a very specific interest in it that I can at least partly trace to your stories.

[Blessing Queen]

Loved it,nice fic!Thanks for sharing!

[Chanel_no5]

lilmissallyvanek: I actually hadn't planned on Maleval, it just happened. I approve though.

Devil Beta is proud to be so!

For some reason "Devil Beta" sounds impossibly cute, although it should sound scary! And, thank you so much!

count: Thank you. Well, you'll never know. It wasn't in my plans to post more before December, at least, I've got a lot of things planned this autumn. But of course my mind already makes up new ideas.

a_nonny_mouse: Awww, I'm flattered! Thank you so much!

Blessing Queen: Thank you!

[SneezeloveronGirls]

A great story with such nice descriptions.

[ValkyriePleasant]

Maleval is love. Maleval is life.

[NoV]

I hope the 'tortured, desperate look' will soon be returning for more fics

Congratulations on clearing the backlog of unfinished fics - kind of gives me a boot up the ass to finish some of the ones that are currently languishing on my computer