Even Doctors Sneeze (Fruits Basket, Hatori)

[RiversD]

Fandom: Fruits Basket

Summary: Hatori's allergic. Shigure exploits it.

Authors Notes: Okay, so... I wrote this a WHILE ago, so there are lots of bits I'm not overjoyed about now, but... I though I might as well submit it anyway. People still like Fruits Basket, right?

I own nothing.

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“Ugh! The hell?” walking downstairs, Yuki felt as though he was stepping into a scented fog. The air was thick with… something. It might once have borne a passing resemblance to berry. Once.

The source of the sickly odour became obvious as Shigure skipped past him, being far too liberal with a brightly coloured spray can. Yuki wrinkled his nose with distaste.

“What the heck are you filling our house with?”

Shigure twirled, seemed to notice Yuki for the first time, and smiled. He waved the can of air-freshener vaguely.

“This? I got it from the Green Drive website.”

“Aren’t those meant for cars?”

“Oh, come now Yuki-kun.” Shigure swept over to cup Yuki’s chin in his hand, taking advantage of the element of surprise to be as patronising as possible.

“Why must you set such meaningless limits? The creative mind must see that all such boundaries are artificial. Oh, the pain of-”

Unsurprisingly, at this point, he was kicked across the room.

---------------------------------------------------

Tohru being Tohru, her only objection to Shigure’s temporary insanity was out of concern for others.

“Will Sohma-san be okay if you do that? His breathing-”

“It’ll be fine, Honda-san.” Yuki assured her. “If it starts to bother me, I’ll just kill him and go for a walk in the woods, alright?”

“Al-alright.” Tohru seemed a little uneasy at the idea of murder, but quickly presumed that Yuki had just made a joke.

“You shouldn’t fret, Tohru.” Shigure swept up behind her and flicked her hair. “Besides, Ha-San’s coming up to see Yuki today. If he says its fine, you

have to believe it, right?”

“I suppose so.” As Shigure had no doubt suspected, Tohru was easily sidetracked by the idea of Hatori visiting them again so soon, and the air freshener was quickly abandoned as a topic of conversation.

----------------------------------------------------

By the time Hatori arrived, most members of the household had almost become used to the fog of scent. Kyo had pitched a fit and migrated to the roof, but that was nothing new. The doctor didn’t seem to notice it immediately- he and Yuki had reached the dining room before he stopped dead in his tracks and asked:

“What is that smell?”

“Oh, right; Shigure’s been filling the house with air freshener today. It doesn’t seem to have affected my breathing much, though, so I’ve been getting used to it.”

“Ah. That Green Drive stuff?”

“Yeah, I think so. Well spotted.”

“Damn.”

There was a strained quality to the doctor’s voice that made Yuki turn to look at him. Tension was visible in Hatori’s face, too, making him look as though he were concentrating very hard on something across the room. His eyelids fluttered shut, and for a moment, he was perfectly still. Then he seemed almost to flinch. His eye twitched, his nose crinkled upwards, and he gasped.

“Hhh… ha…ha-tchou!” Hatori’s head snapped forwards into his curled palm.

Yuki blinked. It was rude to stare, and yet-

“hh’tchou! Hhh… haTchou!” Hatori straightened up, still blinking a little too fast.

“Wow. Are you alright?”

“I will be, I just have a re-a…hah…” The doctor’s sentence warped and trailed into nothingness as the urge to sneeze seized him again.

Perhaps hoping to gain some control over the fit, he compressed the next few into firm stifles, but didn’t manage to keep it up for long.

“Ngxt!Ngxt! Ngxt! hh…hh..hhhissshuh!”

“Bless you. Are you sure-”

There came the sound of hurrying feet from outside, and Shigure poked his head around the door, a slightly concerned expression on his face.

“Did I miss it?”

“Shigure, you-” was all that Hatori managed before another sneeze almost doubled him over, fringe fluttering up from his scarred eye.

Shigure grinned. “Apparently not.”

“You utter- hh! Nggsh’t!”

“Now, now Haa-San. You were brought up better than that.”

The fingers of Hatori’s left hand made his feelings towards that statement abundantly clear. Shigure laughed.

Still confused, Yuki appealed to the author of this madness.

“What’s wrong? Shigure, what’s going on?”

“Ne, nothing to concern yourself about, Yuki-kun. I heard that Ha-san had picked up an allergy, and I couldn’t resist seeing if it was true.”

Hatori made another rude gesture in Shigure’s direction as the penny dropped for Yuki.

“An all- Shigure! That’s a really dangerous thing to do!”

Shigure wagged a finger in Yuki’s general direction.

“Now, Yuki, it doesn’t count as recklessness if you do it to a doctor.”

“That’s not how it works, and you know it! Honestly, you’re such a fool.”

Yuki stalked back over to Hatori’s side and extended an arm.

“Come on Hatori. It will be better if you get outside, right?”

The doctor accepted Yuki’s arm and dragged himself back upright. He was obviously in some discomfort by now, but still paused to make one last attempt at chastising Shigure.

“I sw- I swear, the next time you need anhh-nxgt! an injection-”

Shigure laughed infuriatingly at him, but Hatori allowed Yuki to guide him out onto the porch nevertheless.

The fresh air was both a blessing and an annoyance, as he now felt hyper-aware of the motion of each slight breeze against his burning nose. Hatori stood swaying slightly on the decking as Yuki dodged back inside, only to emerge again bearing tissues.

“Here.” He said, pressing the pack into Hatori’s hand. “I guess you’ll probably need some of these. Um. Would you rather I gave you some… space, to sort yourself out?”

The doctor’s frantic scrabbling for a tissue indicated that Yuki wouldn’t get an immediate answer, though Hatori seemed determined to prevent any of his fits reaching their full potential.

“h…hhh…hitchou! hisshou! eh..eichew! hhn.”

He cut them off at the earliest possible moment, and blew his nose to buy himself a little more time, though the now-constant movement of his nostrils suggested that he would have to pay back his gains now with interest.

“Yes, thadnk…” irritated, he dabbed viciously at his nose once more, and tried again.

“thank you. A bit of privacy would not be unappreciated.”

“Alright then. I’ll be in the gardens if you need me. I guess you know your way around.”

Hatori nodded, already reaching for a fresh tissue. Out of reasons to stay, Yuki headed round the side of the house.

Hatori made himself as comfortable as he could against the side of the house and breathed slowly, resisting his instinct to fight against his nose’s pressing demands.

“ish! Ishkt! Ah… ah…” two brisk, unsatisfying sneezes, but the real release refused to come. Having held it off for so long, now that he had the leisure

to surrender to the fit it was taking its own sweet time.

“eh…hhh! hh… ah…eeeh… hn.” Hatori’s eyes were watering, expectantly closed eyelids involuntarily contracting and relaxing with each impossibly frustrating near miss.

“Nuuh.”

He tried to clear some of the irritation into a tissue, but to no great effect. He felt as though a colony of ants had invaded his nostrils, fancying that he could feel each tiny footfall in the prickling itch that scurried relentlessly up and down the tender passages until the only thing occupying any space in his head was the immediate, desperate need.

His lips parted as his breath began to hitch again. He offered up a silent prayer that this time...

“eeh…anhh…ahhh….hh’tchou! hh’chou! ‘choo! ‘choo! ‘chsst!

He was forced to pause mid-stream, having run out of air. Little lights flickered at the corners of his vision. He sucked in one long, shuddering breath, only to have it painfully torn free as the pitiless fit continued to rack his body.

“hh’ischoo! Ischou! Ischh! ... hischiou! … hii’chou! hh’chiEW!”

That seemed to be the worst of it. He used the tissues as best he could with his breathing still jittering about like a wind-sock in a storm. His chest twinged with each gasping inhale, but he wasn’t in a position to do much about it.

“Bless you.”

Shigure emerged from the house, looking far too cheerful for his own health.

“Someone’s thinking about you really hard, Ha-san.”

“Bastard.”

Hatori winced at the sound of his own voice, and went back to blowing his nose. Shigure just kept smiling. Concern might have existed on some deep level of his consciousness, but it would probably require a mining expedition to prove it,

“Wow. That must have been some drive the other day, huh?”

Hatori sighed, and slumped down onto the decking. Finally, resigned, he asked;

“Aya betrayed me, didn’t he?”

Shigure’s grin threatened to split his head in two. “But of course, Ha-San. What else did you expect?”

[VoOs]

Absolutely delightful, this. I adore your writing style!

He tried to clear some of the irritation into a tissue, but to no great effect. He felt as though a colony of ants had invaded his nostrils, fancying that he could feel each tiny footfall in the prickling itch that scurried relentlessly up and down the tender passages until the only thing occupying any space in his head was the immediate, desperate need.

^this bit, yeah? So, so hot. *pleasant shivers*

[Bobsuperawesome]

Oh. My. Gawd. HELL YEAH PEOPLE STILL LIKE FRUITS BASKET!!!!

[Sawyer]

Aww, I love this!! Every three or four years I go and watch the anime a couple times and I just did that a few months ago! This really hit the spot. You got their voices down so well!

[Spoo]

Oh. My. God.

LET ME TELL YOU A THING, RIVERSD. Fruits Basket was my life from 2004 to 2006. I was absolutely and hopelessly obsessed. In fact, I still have Fruits Basket posters in my bedroom, as well as a hefty collection of the manga line. Hatori is my absolute favorite character, so this was wonderful to read. Such a phenomenal blast from the past!

And before Ouroboros can say anything, Hatori is MINE! *Cackles madly and flees*

Edited July 21, 2014 by Spoo

[Akahana]

Yes

Hell yes

hell fucking yes

this is so hot an beautiful and I'm melting <3

[SterlingSilver]

YESSS~ Fruits Basket~! QwQ~

A golden oldie in my opinion~ Suuuuper cute, and so many delicious descriptions in here~

You portrayed Shigure beautifully haha~

[RiversD]

Omigosh you guys. I am not worthy. Seriously, I was going to reply individually, then I remembered how many of you are authors that I look up to with sheer awe and I melted.

I love you all.

[Bobsuperawesome]

Omigosh you guys. I am not worthy. Seriously, I was going to reply individually, then I remembered how many of you are authors that I look up to with sheer awe and I melted.

I love you all.

Okay I know I'm probably not one of those authors, but I'm going to take that like it was my compliment! Thank you hon!!!!! GO HATORI!!!!!!!!!!!

[Sawyer]

Omigosh you guys. I am not worthy. Seriously, I was going to reply individually, then I remembered how many of you are authors that I look up to with sheer awe and I melted.

I love you all.

Don't be shy! You deserve the praise. This was awesome.

[Zuki]

This is great! I've always loved Fruits Basket, I've got a major soft spot for Shigure though he definitely can be a bit of an ass.

Poor Ha-san, I can just imagine how awkward that felt.

Leave it to Ayame to spill the beans. lol.

[Zane]

0_0 You...... You made a Hatori fanfic?!!!!! I think I'm in fangirl HEAVEN now!!!! I mean I don't go on for a while and when I come on there's a Hatori fanfic?! I must be dreaming!!! jk. Anyway..... Thank you so much for writing this! you have no idea how happy I am right now! I'm going to go read it again!..... and again and again......

[Natto]

Oh dear lord. XD; It's been ages since I even thought about Fruits Basket, but it used to be one of my main fandoms. Hatori was one of my favorite characters! So seeing him tormented now was both delicious and hilarious. The "fun happy bouncy" atmosphere of the story really matched the atmosphere of some of the sillier, more slapstick episodes, while still managing to retain some of the darkness that makes the series so interesting. Yuki's right--it's dangerous to mess with allergies. I like to think he was so upset about it because his lung issues are triggered by allergens. >.>; Anyway, this was a lovely story, thank you so much for posting it!