Stupid Plants (A Homestuck Fanfiction)

[striderlicious]

Okay so this is like my first /real/ post here so I'm sorry if it's kinda sucky. But I've been wanting to write sneezestuck for a while and my friend gave me a prompt for it I wanna use. I love Jake/Dave even though it's a hecka rare pairing. So that's what's up with this story. Also I apologize for not being able to write sneezes too well.

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You had been hella pumped for this trip you were taking for weeks. Youhad finally been allowed you to go visit your boyfriend on the island he lived on in some place in the dang middle of the ocean.Why he lived there only the big man upstairs knew. That is if the guy even existed. But not the point. You were finally getting to see your boyfriend, Jake English.

The smallish plane landed, dropping you off on the jungle covered island and flying away once more after deeming you in a safe spot. Unfortunately, all this new flora was not good for you. Having grown up in the middle of the city in the dang state of Texas, you didn't get much more plants than the trees, and all the plants in the parks.That of course, meant you were not used to the mess of plant intercourse going on throughout the entire place.

There was a tickle in your nostrils, alerting you of the inevitable thing to come. "Heh....Heh...HATCHX! Hehtchxk! Hackthcew! Hectchx!"

You wipe at your nose with your sleeve, and of course that is when your dorky boyfriend decides to come greet you. Of course. The adventure loving dark haired boy walks up to you, a way too adorable grin on his face. Goddammit English.

"Why hello there, Strider! Welcome to my humble...well...island! I know it's a bit of a mess and all with the plants and everything, but to me it is home sweet home."

Thankfully, Jake hadn't noticed the rather uncool sneezing fit you had just had. He was most likely more just completely excited for your presence here. That was proven as he throws his arms around you in a hug. You hug back, of course. Because sheesh, no Strider resists a hug from their boyfriend. It just wasn't a thing to do. Especially when one's boyfriend lives all the way across the fucking ocean.

You can't help but grin slightly at the other, a flash of red braces showing. Your nose is actually turning to match the color apparently, the surroundings completely irritating your system.

"It's pretty fucking great to see you in person finally. Like goddamn jumping through all those hoops and stuff for bro just to convince him to let me come out here like some goddamn dolphin begging for fish or something. Wasn't fun. Let me tell you. But hey I'm here now."

You sniffle slightly, pulling away from the other. Your nose has not stopped itching the entire time, but you are resisting the urge to sneeze again. It was better not to let your boyfriend know you were allergic to his entire home. Hell to the no.

Unfortunately, your nose was beginning to leak slightly, and you had to tur away to wipe it on your sleeve. Frick. This was not going well. You were supposed to be cool kid Dave Strider, but instead you were an allegy ridden mess.

Of course, Jake notices as you turn away, looking at you with a concerned face. "Dave...Are you alright?"

You turn back to him, waving him off. "Yeah yeah I'm fine. Don't worry about it."

"Are you sure? You seem slightly off today."

"Nah man. I'm fucking fantastic. Cooler than a goddamn ice cube in the artic in the fricking freezer of penguins. Cooler tha...than...hahCHXSH! hahCHXKS! ahCHESKX!"

Fuck. Smooth Dave. You wipe at your nose again as your boyfriend frowns at you. Jake approaches you, sighing. Yeah he'd caught on fairly quickly. It didn't help when you looked the part of an allergy ridden Strider.

"Strider. Why did you not just say in the first place that you had allergies? I mean it is quite obvious you are not at ease with the surroundings, by the state of your pinkish, and might I say, still completely adorable nose."

You can't help but blush slightly at the compliment, before you glare at him slightly. "Shut up English. I'm not adorable."

"I believe you would be wrong in that fact. Now come with me. I believe getting you inside would be a good thing. Plus you need a place to set your stuff."

You nod, wiping at your dripping nose once more. "Probably a good idea."

You then gather up your things, following the other as he leads you through the dense jungle to his house. You hae to pause to sneeze a few more times, but finally you make it. Jake holds the door open for you like the goddamn fantastic gentleman he is, and you step inside.

"Thanks Jake. You are like a goddamn lifesaver dude. Saving me from all that plant sex and shit like sheesh. I could have died." You are still feeling slightly messed up, but being indoors does definitely help.

Jake chuckles at your comment, rummaging around in a drawer before pulling out a box of tissues. "Anything for you, my darling. And I believe you may need these as well." He hands the box to you, grinning again.

You take it gratefully, nodding. He follows you as you head back to the couch, sitting down with your tissue box. You take a few to clean up your face with as the other comes to sit beside you. He pulls you closer to him, nuzzling you slightly. Yeah. You would be okay with this. Enduring the torture of the island was totally and utterly worth it.

END

[4000tacobells]

Hell yeah! I'm really glad you found use for the prompt. This is hecka cute and I can't wait to see more from you <3

[42686]

Mmmm sneezy Dave is always nice <3

this is my first time reading something with this ship, i'm kind of interested in it now heheh