The Power of a Good Curse (SPN, from TG comment LJ)

[stephab13]

So, I've just joined LJ and Tarotgirl has an INCREDIBLE meme (is that what they're called?) going on with some EPIC prompts. This one was, Naomie’s been behind the scene for a while now but before she brainwashed Castiel into killing Dean multiple times, before she holed his ass in Heaven to reprogram him again in “Rapture”, she first tried a more subtle approach. She gave him a severe cursing allergy. And of course, nobody cusses as much as Dean. Bonus if Dean’s cussing level gets worse as Cas sneezes more and more. And Sam has to shut him up.

I had to give it a go. Loving the SPN love too much! (especially Cas. Hngggggg). So, be wary of language, but that should be it. Hope you enjoy it!!!

“Son of a bitch!”

“I’KSTCH!”

He didn’t know how he managed it, but even with the pain exploding from his leg, he still got out a grunted “bless you,” as he hopped his way to the hotel bed. Perhaps if not for the agony he may have noticed the confused furrow of Cas’ brow – no doubt questioning the archaic tradition of not damning a soul to hell by sternutation – but instead all he saw were white flashes around him, vision tunnelling inwards, Sam’s fingers clicking in his face, pressing against the rest of his body.

He totally missed Cas rising to his feet, and that glow that seemed to accompany him whenever his powers might be of use.

“FUCK, Sammy, leave my fucking leg alone.”

“What… I’kshhh-hih’KIIISHHH! … What happened?”

“You sneezed,” Sam called over his shoulder, though the hands didn’t let up, not yet satisfied there was nothing else broken.

But Dean couldn’t miss the exasperation rolling off the angel – if only he knew how to eyeroll. The bitch glare was epic though – enough to force a role of bordering-on-hysterics-laughter from his chest. “I meant, what happened to Dean?”

“Some son of a bitch thought it’d be – “

“PTSHHHH!”

“Thought it’d be funny to conjure up a black widow, so we’re chasing the bastard down –“

“I’kshh’U!”

“And he rolled his ankle,” Sam finished for him, fishing out a bag of frozen peas.

“I didn’t roll my ankle.” The words tumbled out on impulse. Dean Winchester does not roll ankles. Dean Winchester is strong and graceful. Dean Winchester does not let anything best him in battle – especially not a ditch, of all things.

“You rolled your ankle.” Sam stared him down as he began to tape the bag in place, daring him to speak again.

Which of course he did. A sprain, he couldn’t deny, but nothing could stop the:

“Bitch.”

“Jerk.”

“H’KSH! H’KSHHHH’IU!”

Their eyes turned to Cas, who was still standing firm, sniffling, looking almost sheepish. Like the interruptions were getting in the way of things, calling attention when really they should be fussing over Dean.

“Bless you!”

“Jesus, Cas – what’s going on?”

“Huh…. Hiuhh…” But the sneeze couldn’t seem to make up its mind completely, leaving the angel looking even more confused than before. “I do not understand.”

Without realising it, Dean had shifted on the bed, making room that would never get used… or at least, not without force. “You getting sick or something?”

“I don’t believe so, no,” the angel muttered. “My leukocyte count hasn’t changed.”

“Weird.”

“Whatever the hell that means.” He shifted on the bed again, pushing himself up to be more comfortable, shoving a pillow under his leg.

“Stop fidgeting, Dean! You’ll knock the ice off, dumbass.”

“Heh’KNXT!”

“But it’s coooold, Sammy.”

“Quit the whinging too.”

“Do you…” Cas sniffed, taking a step or two forward. “Do you want me to look at that, Dean? I might be able to help.”

His leg jerked up – with only a tiny hiss of pain – but it was Sam that beat him to the punch, Dean too busy swearing under his breath.

“Is that a good idea, Cas? We don’t know why you’re sneezing. Don’t you need to save your angel mojo or whatever, in case you need to use it on yourself?”

“My ‘mojo’ will be fine. KSH!” Another step forward, though this was distinctly less certain. “I’knxt! … Dean, hold still.”

Easier said than done. He knew how purple and swollen the damn joint was – but looking at it, he couldn’t help but flinch. Flinching sent a string of pain shooting up his leg, which in turn sent another string of curses flying from his mouth.

“Fuck! Oh, fuck, that hurts. Shit, we fucked up pretty good, didn’t we, Sam? Fucking dumbass. Fucking black widow. Fucking ditch.”

Cas trembled. Actually trembled. He took in a huge gulp of air… and then let out a string of rapid-fires. “Heh’knxt’heh’KNXT! Heh’kish’kish’KSHH’KNXT! I’KISH’U-I’KIESH’OO!”

“Oooohkay then.” Sam didn’t even blink before jumping in to action. “Cas, sit down.” He didn’t even give the angel a chance to react, hand on his shoulder pressing him down by Dean’s side. “Get your breath back.

”

Dean winked. “You can join me in the naughty corner.”

“Dean, shut up.” The orders continued. But these were replaced now, Sam frowning slightly, eyes flicking just over to the left in thought. “Cas… what the hell just happened?”

“Hik’shh!”

“You’re gonna sneeze if I call you a dumbass, right?”

“KIESH!”

“Thought so.” Sam shook his head, sinking down into the twin opposite them. “I think you’ve been cursed… to react whenever someone… curses…”

Dean’s eyes lit up. “Oh, we gotta learn how to do that.”

“Dean…”

He meant to hold it back, he really did. But with his angel beside him – his very sneezy angel, nonetheless, with whom he now held an extraordinary power… in such close proximity that he could feel every muscle in his body tense and relax…

“Bitch.”

“Ihh’KISHH’U!”

[Dye]

Oh my goodness sneezy Cas @w@

This is fantastic~

[Sawyer]

just wanted to pop in to say i'm so into this and i'll leave you a more detailed list on the meme later probably. you're awesome!!! this is awesome!!!!

[gummiflummi]

Sooo cute

What a great prompt. And an even better fill.

[NorthernLady]

Hihi I love inspiring people You really made my day

“Fuck! Oh, fuck, that hurts. Shit, we fucked up pretty good, didn’t we, Sam? Fucking dumbass. Fucking black widow. Fucking ditch.”

Cas trembled. Actually trembled. He took in a huge gulp of air… and then let out a string of rapid-fires. “Heh’knxt’heh’KNXT! Heh’kish’kish’KSHH’KNXT! I’KISH’U-I’KIESH’OO!”

“Oooohkay then.” Sam didn’t even blink before jumping in to action. “Cas, sit down.” He didn’t even give the angel a chance to react, hand on his shoulder pressing him down by Dean’s side. “Get your breath back.

Nothing short of God or Naomie could have pulled that stunt. Well... maybe very powerfull witches too. I'd love to read more but it's still perfect as it ls

[tenderwarrior]

What a cute story! I loved it!

[Always-a-Ginger]

Wow!

This is incredible. Love it

[SterlingSilver]

QwQ~ Uwaa, this is beautiful~

I love nothing more than a sneezy Cas, for real~

I really love how you made him all ashamed to continue interrupting, and with so little care for what's actually happening to him xD

Really well done, and totally a favorite of mine now >w<~

But actually, could someone tell me this-- do we need to have LJ accounts to participate? I was thinking about doing something, but have not made an account haha~

Edited April 16, 2014 by BlackScatter

[NorthernLady]

Pretty sure you can write and fill prompts as an anonymous.

I hope you can join the party Blackscatter:) Lots of Cas prompt to go around

[Lexi]

AAGGH Soo cute!

[peppercat]

Ohohoho what is this magic that I have found??? Normally I don't particularly endorse swearing, but when it's used like this, well... You have to make exceptions

[Dylan]

Holy mother of pearl balls.........

This is actually incredible!!

Ooh, please do continue if you can <3

I'm up for reading every part of this if you carry on (:

[NorthernLady]

I sure wouldn't mind if you'd continue... I have the feeling Dean could have fun with this, sneeze kink or not *evil smirk*

Holy mother of pearl balls.........

Are you channelling Bobby?

[Dylan]

I sure wouldn't mind if you'd continue... I have the feeling Dean could have fun with this, sneeze kink or not *evil smirk*

Holy mother of pearl balls.........

Are you channelling Bobby?

Hehehe.... (:

Maybe :3

[SpookyScarySkeleton]

Wonderful fic ;o. I was trying to figure out what was making Cas sneeze the whole time, didnt see that coming. Aha well he shouldn't hang around Dean then if he's cursed over CURSE words . Okay I'll show myself out.~

[Pyrus_Fangmon]

OH please please please continue this!

The story line of them trying to undo the curse and Dean's teasing is giving me butterflies