Dr. Horrible: Everything You Ever (Billy, Cold)

[Mercury]

A/N: This is an unofficial prequel to the other Dr. Horrible fic I wrote absolutely ages ago. It may have anyother part, because it ended up being shorter than I'd wanted, but if it does I won't be able to write it for a while.

Enjoy.

Everything You Ever

Meetings for Evil League of Evil occurred semi-regularly. Billy had found that, although they were all assumed to have individual lives and plans, members of the ELE rarely went out and actively preformed evil acts. All plots that were formed had to be run through the league first, but no one ever agreed on anything. Members were always shooting down other people’s ideas, assuming they were better, more evil than everyone else at the table and that everyone else was just plain useless.

Billy had kept quiet during these meetings, realizing that the loudest members were the most hated. Several of them were also painfully old-fashioned, not really being up on his technology and immediately dismissing it in favour of their own ideas of elaborate traps and disguises, which made Billy feel as though he would most likely be ignored even if he did speak up.

Instead, he had spent over a week secretly working on his special bio-weapon that would temporarily incapacitate specific members of the league.

Overall, Billy had found his whole experience in the league disappointing.

“HehSHHHOO!” He wiped his nose with a scowl.

Damn misfiring bio-weapon. Not only was that also disappointing, but it was ruining the sleave of his uniform.

“Hashhhushhhhooo! HUSHHHHOO!”

He coughed deep in his throat and searched desperately for a tissue. The closest he had were the paper towels he used to wipe down his benches, but he didn’t want to use something so rough on his nose. It was already sensitive enough.

Billy sniffed wetly to try and compensate, and it sounded disgusting in way he would never want company to hear.

Thankfully, he had given up trying to inhale through his nose, disgustingly or otherwise, when the door to his lab slammed open.

Through it came Fake Thomas Jefferson, one of the more arrogant members of the league who was convinced that he would be taking over it from Bad Horse when the time came.

“You there. Horrible.”

“Yes, whad?” He spun the chair around, hoping there wasn’t too much visible mess.

Fake Jefferson puffed himself up slightly. “I have been tasked with creating this device and you are required for the construction.”

He passed over a scroll, of all things, and Billy refrained from rolling his eyes as he unfurled it to reveal the task. What they were wanting was clearly beyond anything Fake Jefferson was capable of, and he knew that the supposedly real ex-president would take credit for any of his work.

Still, he couldn’t say no. Pissing off any member of The Evil League of Evil wasn’t going to be a good idea, their idea of pranks were not benign. He had seen what Dead Bowie and Fake Jefferson do to each other just because they found the other annoying, and had heard about what they had done to Professor Normal when he bailed on a league meeting to pick up his kids from soccer, and didn’t want to be on any end of it.

Billy felt his nose flair as a tickle built deep within. He scrubbed at it, hoping it would go away.

“That’s fihhhh... f-fine.”

Fake Jefferson tiled his nose up and cast him a look out of the corner of his eye. It was curious but uncaring, but it was clear that any condition Doctor Horrible was in didn’t concern him unless he was unable to make the senior member look good.

Billy cleared his throat, being careful not to turn it into a cough, “I’ll get sdarted and order sobe baterials.”

“We need it as soon as possible; you’ll have to get it yourself.”

“Isd’t that a henchben’s job?”

The older man’s nose crinkled, as if something foul had been placed beneath it. “The Henchmen’s Union has decreed that any member has the right to refuse work on Saturday night and the subsequent Sunday.”

His tone said exactly what he thought of the lesser-classed group and their rights. Of course, league policy was that only accredited henchmen were to be contracted as help and so they did not have any other option than to acknowledge their wishes.

“Right.” He croaked dejectedly. “Right I-I’ll do that, thed.”

He could feel his nose running, but didn’t want to sniff again lest it set off about of sneezes. Thankfully, Fake Thomas Jefferson had decided he was satisfied Billy would do as he was told. He gave a satisfied nod, one that seemed to be congratulating himself for a good job rather than thanking Doctor Horrible for the favour, and then turned in a dismissive motion.

Jamming a fist under his nose, Billy spun around and waited until he heard the large metal door of his lab slide shut before he allowed himself some relief.

“HASHHHOOO! HITCHHHHOO! AKSHHHOO!”

He groaned and rubbed his nose on his sleeve. The cold was getting far too wet for his uniform, but he still did not want to use the paper towels. He snuffled again and looked down at the hopelessly outdated scroll and signed at the design sketched on there.

It was a mind-control device. Completely ridiculous even if the schematics made any semblance of sense. He would have to re-design it and there were several parts that would be expensive to obtain.

He sneezed tiredly, “Hushhhttt!”

Rising and placing both a zip-up hoodie and a thick trench coat over his Doctor uniform, Billy decided he would call it a day under the pretence of going out to find parts for the device. He could get a lot of them from Ebay, which would seem impressive to a bunch of people of whom only one, maybe two, used the internet.

Billy didn’t acknowledge anyone as he made his way out of the building, he kept his hood high and back of fist to his nose as he flicked through his messages on his phone. While his only thoughts were of having a hot shower and crawling into bed he noticed that he not only had a number of texts from Moist, but also notifications for several unread e-mails from his blog.

It did touch him slightly that people were still watching despite him not displaying his Doctor Horrible persona anymore, and he really appreciated people who appreciated him and the work his was doing; people who weren’t the Evil League of Evil.

“Hekishhhtttt! HUSSHHOO!”

He supposed he could find time for quick video before his cold got much worse.

Edited March 24, 2014 by Mercury

[Sawyer]

Oh my god. I remember way back in the day, you were the one giving me ideas for my Dr. Horrible fic. This totally brings me back. Your stuff is THE BEST... I'm so happy to see this. Poor sweet sweet Billy...

[PetalPunk]

So great! I love Dr. Horrible! I just love Neil Patrick Harris!

[Dye]

*screams loudly in the distance*I finally saw Dr. Horrible quite recently and I'm so happy this has come along because neil patrick harris

Edited March 24, 2014 by Daisoku

[jadeharley]

i was soooOOO excited when i saw this because it was actually your dr.horrible fanfic that brought me to this forum Forever ago so thanks for that & thanks for this !!

[Thespian Jaybird]

Ok, so I just HAD to comment on this When I saw the title I did a complete double take and then completely fangirl-squealed. I absolutely adore Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog! I was having such a terrible weekend and this completely made it better Thank you so much!

[beatlelover22]

That was fantastic! I love Dr. Horrible!

[•.*°•☆. Q .☆•°*.•]

*faint whimper of extreme approval*

[Invisibles]

Oh my GOSH how on earth did I miss this?? It's written so well! aah <3 Fantastic job!