The Impending Storm: Criminal Minds (Mostly Hotch/JJ, a little of everyone else)

June 19, 2014

It wasn't bad, it was great!! I'm extremely pleased with this story. I look forward to reading every chapter. You really need to give yourself more credit because this is amazing!! Please continue! (But don't rush, I don't want that.) Continue at your own pace.

June 20, 2014

this is perfection. absolute perfection.

July 1, 2014

AHHH more please!!!

July 2, 2014

Thank you so much for the continued support! I hope this part isn't too bad-I'm not as proud of it as I want to be, but I wanted to update. Thank you again-your comments mean so much!

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They stayed like that for a while. Hotch slept, while JJ anxiously kept watch over her ill friend and occasionally re-wetted the cool cloth. She didn't like the way his cheeks were deeply flushed, especially against his pale skin. Once in a while, he would roll over or cough, but aside from that, congested snoring, and sniffling, he remained asleep. Once JJ was sure he wouldn't stir, she turned her phone on again and stepped into the bathroom to call Rossi. He answered on the first ring.

"Hello, Dave. How are you all holding up?"

She asked quietly. JJ felt a bit guilty being in the warm hotel while her teammates were in the cold.

"We're fine, Bella. How are you doing?"

"Fine. Rossi, it's cold out there. Is Prentiss wearing her scarf? Is everyone okay? No one is getting too chilled, right? Did you pass out the hand warmers I gave you?"

She rattled off several questions before pausing for a breath.

On the other end of the phone, Rossi rolled his eyes. No one was struggling as badly with the cold as Hotch and JJ had been. Leave it to the mother hen to be taking care of everyone.

"We're fine. Yes, she is; no, no one is getting chilled; yes, everyone is perfectly well; yes, I passed out the hand warmers; and we are on our way back now. We'll stop and get something hot to eat at that 24-hour place. How's Hotch?"

JJ felt herself relax when she heard that her friends were okay. The question about Hotch put the worry about him back in the front of her mind, and she peeked around the edge of the door to be sure he was still sleeping before responding.

"He's not doing great-collapsed in the parking garage and barely made it to the hotel room. Coughing, sneezing, the works. Oh-his fever was 102.8. At this point, I'm just trying to keep him comfortable. When do you think we can leave?"

Rossi sighed. Stupid, stupid Aaron. Why couldn't he have taken a day or two for his cold before it turned to this?

"What do you mean, collapsed?"

"He fell over-got really dizzy. Then the elevator wasn't working so we had to take the stairs and he had about a million coughing fits-by the time we got here, he was almost asleep on his feet. When can we leave?"

She asked again, her worry mounting. Hotch should be at home, but traveling this ill wouldn't be pleasant, and she wanted to make sure someone kept an eye on him...

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Rossi sighed, prompting an anxious glance from Emily.

"Everything okay?"

She mouthed from the passenger seat. He nodded before answering JJ.

"They canceled our flight-there's a huge storm coming up. It's starting to get us a bit now, but we'll be fine to make it back to the hotel. We'll probably leave-what is it, Friday? We'll probably leave on Monday."

Rossi heard JJ let out a soft breath neither of them had realize she had been holding.

"Oh, that's good. More time to have him rest...I'll have to get some more meds."

She murmured, and Dave found himself wondering if she had remembered she was on the phone.

"Okay, we're at the restaurant. I'll check in on you soon."

"Thanks, Dave. Can you pick up some chicken soup for Hotch?"

The Italian assured her that he could and would, and once she had repeatedly denied his offers of food, hung up. It was going to be a long weekend.

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JJ stretched after standing up from the edge of the tub, and considered going back to her room to change into comfortable clothes. She decided against it, and instead, washed the makeup off of her face , pulled her hair into a loose bun, and left her boots by the door before resuming her seat in the darkness beside Hotch.

She resumed her pattern for the cool cloth-wet, wring out, put on for two minutes, flip, leave on for two minutes, repeat five times, rest for ten minutes-and kept an anxious eye on the time. Hotch had taken cold medicine at 1:30a.m. as she had marked down on her phone, so he could have more at 7:30a.m. There was a lot of time to kill between now(3:45 a.m.) and then.

Time passed strangely. JJ was absolutely exhausted, but could not and would not sleep. She was determined to keep an eye on Hotch, especially as he tossed and turned. His fever was tracking up, and he seemed much less comfortable than he had originally.

It seemed like no matter where the covers were, JJ had to adjust them. When Aaron's face was flushed and sweaty, she moved the covers down, rolled up his sleeves, and let the washcloth cover his arms and neck for a few seconds at a time. When he was cold, she replaced the cloth on his forehead, rolled down his sleeves, and tugged the covers up over his long, muscular frame. Then she had, if she was lucky, ten minutes before the next round.

Around five, JJ started feeling really tired. Her eyes were sliding shut, and she kept forcing them back open. She could not sleep-what if Aaron needed her? It was unlikely that he would wake her. What if he passed out? No-she was going to have to stay awake.

JJ stood up, and went to the bathroom. She washed her hands, then splashed cold water on her face, dried it, and returned to Hotch's side, feeling a bit more awake. In order to keep her eyes open, she pulled out her phone and began to handle the publicity reports and paperwork that had built up on the case. She worked for an hour and a half before Hotch woke up.

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Aaron woke up feeling even worse than he had when he had fallen asleep. His chest hurt, his whole body ached, and his throat was on fire. A lengthy coughing fit did nothing to help his symptoms.

At first, he stayed in his prone position, but when the fit failed to subside,(and, in fact, became more intense), he felt someone pull him upright and press a glass to his lips. He leaned against them as he sputtered and coughed raggedly. When the fit finally ended, he was exhausted and shivering. Someone laid him back down, tucked him in, and then he was asleep.

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JJ heard Hotch cough a few times, but didn't think anything of it until a few seconds later, when a harsh, chesty, rattling cough that sounded even worse than before began. She grabbed another bottle of water and moved to his side in an instant. When he didn't make a move to sit up on his own, JJ looped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him upright, raising the water to his lips in the same motion. Hotch tried to cover his mouth with a cupped hand, but was too out of it to really manage. JJ felt his hand gripping her leg, though, and felt her pulse rate quicken. His fever must have been up.

Eventually, Aaron managed to swallow the water and end the fit. She lowered him back down, adjusted the covers, and re-wet the cool cloth. By the time she put it on his forehead, her boss was already asleep. This time, though, JJ didn't leave his side. She covered his hand with hers, and gently rubbed her thumb over the back of it.

Helpless. That was how she felt: helpless. Hotch was fighting an illness and she couldn't make him better. He was fighting grief, and she couldn't make him better. Her friend was hurting, and she couldn't make it better. That was unusual. JJ knew that normally she could "fix" her teammates. It took time, but it was worth it. Hotch was different. He wouldn't let her in, and it was killing her to see him in so much pain.

A soft rap on the door startled JJ out of her spiraling thoughts, and she quickly checked to see that Hotch was still asleep before going to answer it. She opened the door to reveal a relaxed-looking Rossi, dressed in FBI sweats and holding a mug of coffee, which he promptly handed to her while signaling that they needed to talk. JJ took it and shut the door, leaving it open just a crack.

"Is everything okay?"

She asked Rossi. He shrugged.

"We're definitely not leaving the state until Monday-there's a huge snowstorm that isn't forecasted to move north of us until Sunday evening. The whole city is shut down at the moment. I just figured you would want to know." He took a breath, then continued. "You, on the other hand, look like hell. Rough night?"

JJ's hand went to her collarbone, and she looked anywhere but Rossi's eyes when she answered.

"Sort of."

"Did you sleep?"

When JJ just shrugged, Rossi sighed.

"And that, cara, is why I brought the coffee. Now, we stopped at the drugstore last night and grabbed some stuff-" Rossi produced a plastic bag from the large pocket of his sweatshirt, and handed it to JJ. "-And I would offer to stay with him while you get some rest, but I know that if you can't be there with him, you will be texting me every five minutes. So, just drink the coffee, and try to relax a bit."

JJ nodded.

"Rossi, thank you...I just...thank you."

She managed. Her friend smiled, and patted her shoulder.

"Anytime. Grazi, Bella. He needs this."

JJ opened the door, and tiptoed back to her chair after putting the bag in the bathroom. She curled up like a cat, and took a sniff to see if she wanted to try the coffee. The stuff in the mug didn't smell great, so she placed it on the nightstand, not taking her eyes off of Hotch's face. He was tossing his head back and forth, his face was sweaty, and a low moan came out every few minutes. She wished 7:30 would come more quickly.

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The first thing that registered when Aaron woke up was that someone was drinking coffee. The second was that his stomach was flipping and lurching and definitely not happy.

He heard JJ gasp in surprise as he sat bolt upright and jumped out of bed, but he didn't stop running(well, if he were being honest, stumbling and tottering at as quick a pace as possible) until he was on his knees in front of the toilet, head bowed over the bowl.

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JJ was beginning to fall into a light doze when Hotch suddenly sat straight up, completely without warning. It startled her so much she nearly dropped her phone, and she let out a soft gasp. His face was gray bordering on green, and he quickly half rolled, half stood up out of bed and moved quickly to the bathroom, a hand clamped firmly over his mouth. He shut the door halfway behind him, but JJ could see him kneeling in front of the toilet, clutching his stomach with one hand and the toilet seat with the other, as he was violently ill.

She was at his side than someone would have thought humanly possible, and she knelt beside him, steadying him with a hand on his bicep and comforting him with a hand rubbing circles on his back. The blonde flushed when he was done, then got up and wet another washcloth. This time, she used it to gently clean the sweat off of his forehead and face before standing up again and repeating the process.

"I'bm sorry I wodke you."

Hotch murmured gruffly after the third time she had begun to sponge his face. JJ frowned.

"I wasn't sleeping, Hotch. I'd only just shut my eyes."

He sighed.

"Were you...uhhh-"

The ill agent paused as a wave of nausea raced through him. JJ immediately was there, and Hotch was grateful to have her by his side. "Thadk you. I'mb so sorry."

He said, and a tear leaked out. JJ took the cloth, wiped it across his forehead and brow, flushed the toilet, and then took Aaron's head in her hands. Using her thumb, she gently wiped the tear away.

"Aaron. Do not apologize. You are sick and tired and in pain and exhausted, and you have absolutely nothing to be sorry for. You are human, as much as you don't want us to think it. You are not burdening me."

Her friend nodded, too sick and weak to summon anymore thought.

A moment later, he wrenched forward and began vomiting again. The gagging sounded painful, and it was, if the pained whimpers and tears leaking out where any indication.

"Oh, Aaron..."

JJ said softly. When he finished, she pulled him into her arms, and cradled his upper body against her as if he were a child. "You're okay, you're going to be okay."

"I feel so sidck." He said quietly.

"I know, Hotch, I know..." She soothed. "This isn't okay." She added after a moment. "Let's get you back to bed."

Hotch shook his head.

"I dod't thidk I'b dode." JJ shrugged.

"The hotel has trashcans. I'll just rinse them out after each episode, spray some Lysol-it's fine. You need to rest. Any idea what set you off?"

Hotch felt a rush of gratitude wash over his feverish mind. JJ was so sweet.

"The coffee..." He choked out, before retching-even the thought of that smell was too much. She sighed.

"On it. It smelled like crap, anyway."

Aaron half smiled, then groaned before puking again. JJ sighed. "Long night" was now "long day".

July 2, 2014

This is really good! Continue!

July 2, 2014

Oh my goodness, poor Hotch is so sick. Good thing he has JJ there to take care of him

Thanks for another great update!!

July 2, 2014

:-) yay for awesome updates!

July 5, 2014

This next part is very angsty, and there's not much sneezing. There is a V-warning, basically the entire time, so you might not want to read this if you're affected by that. There's no description of the mess, though. Also, this part is very out if character for Hotch, and I know that...I just couldn't write it another way. I'm sorry!

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After JJ had put the coffee in the hall outside of Rossi's room, with a note explaining what had happened and asking him to dispose of it, the blonde got several plastic bags and a can of disinfectant from housekeeping before heading back to the hotel room. She was exhausted, and wished the coffee hadn't made Hotch feel so sick, because she was having trouble keeping her eyes open. The walk down to the front desk helped, though, and she was glad for that.

Upon re-entering the room, JJ found that Hotch had shut the door to the bathroom, and she could hear him emptying the contents of his stomach into the toilet bowl, or at least trying to. By the desperate sound of the heaves, nothing was coming up. Concerned, JJ tried the door-locked. She frowned, and resisted the urge to groan.

"Hotch, may I come in?"

Another violent retch greeted her before a weak reply drifted through the door.

"JJ, bmaybe you should leave..."

The sentence sounded more strained and tense as it went on. She felt her pulse quicken when Hotch groaned before heaving again.

JJ wasn't sure what to do. Hotch sounded miserable, but she was obviously embarrassing him. Still, she doubted his ability to stand up, and knew he wouldn't eat or drink anything if left to his own devices.

"I'm not going anywhere, Hotch. Please, open the door."

She called softly, trying to find a key, once the gagging had stopped.

"JJ, please...go..."

Her boss and friend choked out before the horrible sound started up again. JJ winced, and waited until he was done before answering in a forceful, no-nonsense tone.

"No way in hell, Hotch."

She heard him sigh softly, then an even more violent round of heaves started up. A soft moan reached her ears, then the sound of repressed sobs mixed with the soundtrack of retching. When it got louder, and mixed with chesty coughs, JJ's blood turned to ice. She knocked loudly.

"Open the damn door, Aaron, or I am calling Morgan to break it down."

A key slid under the door, and JJ quickly unlocked it before turning the knob. The door opened, revealing Hotch slumped between the wall and the toilet, eyes closed, and breathing raggedly from emotion and exertion. She was at his side in an instant, panicking at how badly he looked. All color was drained from her boss' face, and it was covered in a layer of sweat. She placed the back of her hand against his head, and winced-his temp was definitely up.

JJ stood up, and grabbed a washcloth and a box of tissues. Hotch took one to blow his nose, causing him to cough harshly a few times, and then slumped against the wall, a hand over his face. His whole body was trembling with the nausea, chills, and emotions he was trying to hold back. JJ's heart broke, and she touched Aaron's shoulder gently.

"Hey, Hotch." She whispered gently. "It's okay. It's just me. You are human-you are allowed to cry."

He shook his head slightly from side to side, before gasping and grabbing the toilet. His whole body shook with the force of the vomiting, and JJ felt helpless as she knelt beside him, sponging his face and neck with the cloth and rubbing his back. When he was done, Aaron gave a hoarse sob, and laid down on the floor, one hand covering his face while the other held his stomach.

"Hotch, do you need an ambulance? Is it your appendix?"

He shook his head no, another sob escaping. JJ climbed awkwardly over the toilet-for all his efforts, only filled with saliva, mucous, and a bit of bile-and pulled Hotch's upper body into her arms for the second time that night. He struggled to twist away, but JJ refused to let him go.

"I'm not letting go, Aaron. You cannot keep this bottled up-I am not letting go. I'm right here, Aaron-right here."

The dam broke. Hotch buried his face in both hands and turned into JJ's shoulder, sobbing. He was sick, grieving, tired, and miserable, and he couldn't keep it in any longer. JJ stayed quiet, rubbing his hair and back and trying to let him get it out, even though hearing how badly he sounded was killing her. She was terrified-the Hotch she knew was strong, stoic, and in control. This man was broken.

They stayed that way for almost half an hour before Hotch began to vomit into the toilet again. Between sobbing and heaving, he couldn't breathe. JJ rubbed his back.

"Breathe, Hotch. You have to breathe."

He nodded, then shook his head.

"Deep breaths. In...out...you have to breathe, Aaron."

He began coughing, and JJ thumped him on the back. The spasms eventually stopped, leaving Hotch's head spinning as he clutched the toilet to stay upright. He looked miserable, and almost too tired to keep his eyes open. JJ made an executive decision.

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Hotch couldn't remember the last time he had been this sick. Everything hurt, especially his stomach. Sweat chilled him to the bone, coughing had made his chest ache, and he was too tired to keep his eyes open. He let JJ's soft, gentle voice wash over him.

"Shh, shh, you're okay. You're okay, Aaron. C'mon, let's get you to bed."

Too tired to argue, Hotch let her sling his arm around her shoulders, and stood up as best as he could. He let JJ keep his body upright as he stumbled to the bed, where he fell, too tired to move. He was exhausted. Too tired to stay awake, too tired to throw up, too tired to fight...too tired.

After lying there for a few moments, he felt a nudge at his lips.

"I need to take your temp, Hotch."

JJ's voice was quiet and gentle. He let her. Barely a minute later, he felt a cool cloth on his head, over his eyes-it felt amazing, and the throbbing in his head lessened slightly.

"JJ?"

He slurred, suddenly scared of being alone as he scrambled to sit up. Cool hands were on him then, easing him back against the soft pillows.

"Shh, shh, I'm right here. I'm not leaving, it's okay. Just sleep, Aaron."

The last thing he was aware of was JJ's hand on his, the thumb rubbing over the back of his hand.

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JJ let out a sigh when Hotch's hoarse, raspy breathing evened out. She wasn't used to seeing him that out of it-ever. He had never broken down like that. It really, really scared her-he was practically non-responsive. His fever was at 103.1, so she was working hard to get that lowered. With all the vomiting, though, plus the crying, she figured that his temp was temporarily elevated, and that she could get it lowered with a cold compress.

She continued to flip the compress, and make frequent trips to the bathroom to re-wet it, until 9:00 in the morning. A soft knock on the door startled her, and she jerked out of a tiny doze-she hadn't even been asleep for two minutes. JJ opened the door, squinting dizzily against the bright hall lights, to find Rossi leaning against the doorway. He took one look at her, and the corners of his mouth turned down.

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Rossi frowned at JJ's appearance when she opened the door. She looked exhausted-pale, dark circles and bags under her red-rimmed eyes, and like she had had a hell of a morning.

"Cara Mia..."

He sighed, putting a hand on her forehead. Much to his relief, it wasn't warm. Her nose wasn't red, either, so he doubted she was ill.

"'M just a little worn out, Dave."

JJ said with a soft smile.

"I can see that. Rough morning?"

She sighed, and rolled her neck around.

"Yeah-he hasn't stopped throwing up for hours. I mean, he's sleeping now, but..."

She trailed off, looking away.

"Is there something you aren't telling me?"

"He just...he's...he's fragile, Rossi. Could you stay with him? I need to shower and change clothes."

Rossi nodded.

"Of course. You look exhausted, Jayje-why don't you sleep for a while?"

She shook her head, crossing her arms and setting her jaw in a way that told Rossi that now was not the time to push her.

"Thanks, but I'll be fine. I'll be back in an hour."

The older Italian watched his friend go down the hallway to her room, and he frowned. She was so good at taking care of others, but she didn't take care of herself. Shaking his head to clear it, he entered Hotch's hotel room. He could worry about JJ later.

The younger man was curled up beneath the covers, a compress over his eyes. Rossi saw a trash can beside the bed, and winced-he hated stomach bugs. Quietly, he crossed to the chair and sat down in it, keeping his eyes on his friend. Hotch had obviously had a rough night-he was completely colorless, and his breathing was raspy.

Rossi reached over and flipped the compress after a moment. Aaron shivered, then relaxed as the cooling cloth eased his headache again. Dave had a feeling JJ had been doing this all night.

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JJ felt a little better once she had showered and changed into a pair of yoga pants, a BAU sweatshirt, and her "FBI Mom" long sleeved shirt from Garcia. With her still-wet blonde hair in a ponytail, she headed back to Hotch's room.

Rossi opened the door for her.

"Bella, you still look exhausted. Did you sleep?"

JJ shook her head.

"Rossi, I am fine. I'll sleep later. Was he okay?"

Dave let it drop. JJ was tired, and stubborn, and arguing would do nothing but put her on the defensive.

"He's okay, but he's been tossing and turning quite a bit."

JJ nodded, and stepped inside the hotel room.

"Thanks, Rossi. I'll get it from here."

Her friend nodded, and left. He could take a hint.

JJ took her place in the chair, frowning at how uncomfortable Hotch seemed. His face was void of color except for the bright pink patches on his cheekbones and nose, sweat was beading his brow, and he was tossing and turning every so often. She made another trip to the bathroom to wet the cloth, and then began to dab it on his forehead and cheeks. God, this flu was hitting him hard.

By 10:30, Hotch was thrashing and letting out whimpers, in addition to the pained moans. She rubbed her thumb over his hand, at a loss for what to do. When tears and incoherent cries joined the mix, JJ had had enough. She leaned over, trying to see his eyes in the semi-darkness.

"Aaron, wake up. You're okay. You need to wake up. Shh, shhh-c'mon Aaron, wake- oh, Jesus!"

Hotch, in the midst of a nightmare made worse by his fever, had been startled by JJ's shaking of his shoulder. Although weakened by the flu, he had still made solid, forceful contact with JJ's eye.

JJ felt like she had been hit with an iron fist. She immediately stopped shaking her boss, and staggered away from the bed, holding the right side of her face. Pain was exploding in her head-she was literally seeing stars.

"Don't cry, don't cry!" She begged silently. It took a few seconds, but the "exploding" pain went away, leaving her with a dull ache and hot feeling around her right eye socket. JJ touched it gently and winced-she had a feeling that would bruise. When she finally was able to focus on something besides the pain, she became very aware of the shallow, panicked breathing of her boss.

She turned back around to find Hotch sitting up, still looking frantic, with tears streaking his pale face.

"Hey, hey, Hotch...Aaron, you're okay. It's okay." He sniffled thickly, and she handed him a tissue.

"JJ?"

His voice was hoarse and barely there-it caught, and he launched into a coughing fit. His friend reached out and gently rubbed his back.

"Easy, easy, easy. Just breathe." He leaned into her, resting his head on his shoulder, as he coughed raggedly into a loosely cupped hand. Instead of improving, Hotch continued coughing until he was sitting upright again, eyes wide with panic as he dry heaved. JJ grabbed the trash can and handed it to him, feeling helpless once again as the force of the heaving bent him in half.

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Hotch wasn't sure why he woke up, but he was glad he had. The nightmare, whatever it had been about, was not one he wanted to relive. He felt panicked, exhausted, and completely confused. Vaguely, he heard someone tell him he was okay, and then a tissue was in his hand.

"JJ?" He asked, after a thick, burbling blow. She sat beside him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, telling him something that his brain couldn't register.

It wasn't until she was thumping his back that he realized he was coughing. The raspy, hoarse explosions tore at his raw throat, and triggered his stomach. All at once, he was heaving. Then, a trashcan was in front of him. He shifted into a kneeling position, clutching at the can like a lifeline, his whole body protesting the painful heaves.

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JJ shifted into a kneeling position as well, keeping her arm around Hotch's shoulders and her other hand on his bicep.

"It's okay, you're okay..."

She cooed over and over, unsure if the tears rolling down his cheeks were from pain, fear, or force. Every time she thought he was done, he lurched forward again, coughing and gagging loudly.

They stayed that way for far too long for JJ's liking. She didn't know how to make him feel better, and there was nothing left for him to vomit. Eventually, the spasms eased, leaving him hunched over the can, breathing heavily. She gently wiped his face and mouth with a tissue, trying anything to soothe him.

Hotch sagged against her then, completely worn out. JJ pushed his hair off of his sweaty forehead, alarmed at how hot it was. After checking it, though, it was only 103-not high enough for an ER visit, unless she couldn't keep him hydrated. Henry's fevers never lasted.

Gently, JJ eased Hotch back against the pillows, then made another trip to the bathroom to wet the cloth. While she was at the sink, she cast her eyes around for something that would make her ailing friend more comfortable. Tissues, judging by the desperately congested sneezes coming from the bedroom.

"Hgnsh! Ah-nngh! Hhcsght! Hhh...hhGSHoo! Nngshoo! TSCHoo! Hhh...hhh...HPSH! Hhhpshoo! Tchoo! Hhh...hhh...hhh...HASCHOO! TSCHOO! ISHOO!"

JJ went back to Hotch's side, and placed her hand between his shoulders, trying to offer whatever comfort she could as her boss sneezed miserably into several tissues.

"Ohhhh, JJ, I dod't feel good."

He whispered when he was done. Her heart broke, hearing how miserable he was.

"I know, Aaron, I know. Do you think you can keep some meds down?" He shook his head no, and she sighed. "Okay. Lay down, I'll stay right here."

Hotch slid back under the covers, looking miserable, while JJ fussed with the pillows. He didn't close his fever-glazed eyes, but kept them on hers.

"Hotch, I'm right here. You're okay."

He nodded, and but didn't close his eyes. JJ suspected that it was the fear of another nightmare keeping him up. She reached out, and put her hand over his. Gently but firmly, she stroked her thumb over the back of his hand.

It took almost an hour for his breathing to even out. Once it did, JJ stood up, rewet the washcloth, and started the cycle over. She was more worried about Hotch than she ever had been before. Normally, he was the one who was strong, and kept everything to himself. He never broke down in front of anyone. Now, he seemed like a shell of the man he had been before-exhausted, frail, and stricken by grief.

July 5, 2014

I'm completely speechless. I don't even have a clue what to say. All I know is that this is fantastic and that you need to continue.

July 7, 2014

Ooh, another wonderful installment! Ugh just keep writing this fic forever, please, I love it!!

(Autocorrect tried to change "fic" to "fix", and maybe that's what I should be calling this, because I am literally addicted to it )

July 7, 2014

oh hotch. he sounds well and truly miserable. maybe just a little trip to the ER is in order.... :-)

March 26, 2015

So, this update only took 8(almost 9) months to scrape together...:/ Sorry about that! It just was not coming together, so I took a break from writing it until I decided to finish it tonight. I hope it isn't too crappy-there's more angst and caretaking coming in the next part. Thanks for sticking with me! I'm sorry that there's no ER trip, Jezebel, but I couldn't write it realistically. I'm working hard to get all my stories finished, which is slow going, but I'm trying. Unfortunately, I'll be dropping off the face of the Earth again in April because with a show, a dance recital, 9 hours of dance classes a week, lots of homework and rehearsal hours, and 57 letters to write(for people I know-it's a tradition I love doing but takes a lot of time), I won't have much time to write until May at the earliest. I'm working on it, though! Anyway, enjoy! As always, your feedback means the world!

By noon, JJ had finished her portion of the paperwork regarding their most recent case, and had drafted a press release that was fairly standard issue: explaining that the UNSUB had been caught, where he/she was being taken, a proclamation of sympathy for the families of the victims and the grieving community, and a "thank-you" to the police department. Normally, she would schedule a press conference, but seeing as the snowstorm was predicted to last until Sunday evening, and how eager they all were to return home, she thought it best to leave that to the police department. She would revise everything later, when she wasn't so worried and exhausted.

In the meantime, Hotch was, much to her relief, finally managing to sleep. He wasn't exactly resting peacefully, but he hadn't woken in nearly two hours, which was a good sign. His body desperately needed the rest. Still, it looked like his reprieve wasn't going to last too much longer-there was much more tossing and turning going on. She sighed quietly, and placed her cool hand on his hot forehead, then let it migrate so that she was cupping his cheek briefly, before placing it back on his forehead as she stroked his hair. Her boss stilled, and his breathing became more regular, earning a smile from JJ.

She was finding herself becoming drowsy in the darkened hotel room. It was warm and the soft, congested snoring beside her made her feel a bit more secure. The case had rattled all of them-Hotch, most obviously, but the others as well. Now, she was beginning to feel her tight muscles unclenching a bit, and her eyelids becoming heavy with the urge to close them. She briefly wondered how much she had slept in the last week-not much, that was for sure. Now, it was beginning to catch up with her. The blonde didn't even try to fight the tiredness; instead, she closed her eyes and slumped over in the chair.

She woke with a start to the sound of someone crying out softly, the words indistinguishable. Her first thought was that Henry was having a nightmare, but a look at the bed-and the alarm clock reading 12:35 am-jogged her memory. Hotch was tossing his head from side to side, and alternating between moaning; whimpering; and yelling quiet, unintelligible phrases. Her brows knit together as she took in how flushed his face was, and the way the fevered skin was covered in a sheen of sweat. She was willing to get that he was going to feel absolutely miserable once he was awake, but she wasn't going to let him suffer through a nightmare. Once again, she found herself calling Hotch's name.

"Hotch...Hotch...hey, Hotch..." Still no response, so she pitched her voice a bit higher and louder. "Aaron...Aaron, wake up...Hotch, come on, you need to wake up." It was obvious that calling his name wasn't doing much, so she shifted-forearm in front of face-and touched his shoulder while calling "Aaron!".

He jolted awake, lurching upright with a choked yell, and promptly dissolved into raspy, painful, scraping coughs. JJ waited, letting him get himself together and calm down, before handing him the glass of water once his face had lost the main panic. Her boss took it gratefully, his hand shaking badly as he let the water help end the coughing fit. She stayed quiet, knowing that he needed to realize the nightmare was over on his own.

"Thanks." He finally managed, his voice at least an octave deeper and nearly monotonous with how hoarse it was, as he handed her the glass. From the sound of it, speaking hurt, and from the way he winced, JJ guessed it was more than a little painful. She tactfully chose to ignore how badly his hand was shaking.

"You okay?" She asked, more to get him to open up than anything else. He was significantly more coherent than he had been over the last 24 hours, and more "Hotch" like-he was trying to sit up straight, and put the pieces of the puzzle dancing just out of reach together-but he still looked like death warmed over, and she could guess the answer pretty easily.

His shoulders hunched unconsciously, and he placed a hand behind him on the bed to sit up a little taller. Tears were still in the corners of his eyes, and JJ had to work hard to not hug him.

"I'm fine." He said gruffly.

"Are you sure? I thought you might be having a nightmare." She bit her lip nervously.

"I said I'm fine." Aaron snapped, though the bite in his voice was lessened slightly by the congestion and lingering tremor. JJ ignored her slightly hurt feelings, and her worry over her boss' mental health, and changed the subject.

"How are you feeling, physically, I mean?" She added hastily at the warning spark in Aaron's eyes. He immediately relaxed a bit, and answered somewhat willingly-probably due to embarrassment over his harsh tone moments before.

"I feel like I got hit by a train." He admitted, rubbing a trembling hand over the side of his face. JJ nodded.

"I'm not surprised-you've been pretty sick the last couple of days." She doubted he remembered much, and assumed that what he did seemed more like a dream than anything. He stayed quiet, processing what was going on. "Do you want to go back to sleep? I could get you something to eat, if you'd like, or some medication. You should try to drink something." Hotch nodded, and swung his legs over the side of the bed, his hands pressed firmly into the mattress as he fought the fever-induced vertigo.

"I think I'm going to go clean up a bit first." He said, then stood up. JJ caught his arm as he swayed for a moment, face draining of color before settling a bit. She was tempted to have him simply go back to sleep, seeing as it was after midnight, but she knew he would feel better when he was a bit cleaner-the fever had caused him to sweat at times during the hours he'd been sleeping.

"You with me?" JJ asked. Hotch nodded, and JJ walked him to the bathroom after letting him grab another pair of sweats from his go-bag, then quietly changed the sheets on the bed and stuck the used ones in the bin housekeeping had provided. She heard the sound of water running, and then a congested, honking blow from inside the bathroom. A moment later, the unit chief emerged from the bathroom unsteadily, rubbing his red, chapped nose with one hand and holding onto the dresser as he made his way to the bed. JJ put a hand on his back and helped him sit down, then looked him over.

Aaron had obviously tried to look as put together as possible, which was hard to do when he was wearing a hooded sweatshirt and plaid pajama bottoms. He had combed his hair, washed his face, and brushed his teeth, but obviously hadn't had the energy to shave. Now, he leaned back against the headboard, shivering slightly and looking pale and exhausted. JJ handed him the thermometer, and he took it and placed it under his tongue without complaint. A moment later, it became obvious that there was a problem.

Hotch's red, sensitive-looking nose gave a shivery little twitch, and he sniffed softly and rubbed it gently. However, the touch only seemed to irritate the germy tickle, as the appendage twitched again, more violently than before. JJ passed him the box of tissues, and he took them gratefully, holding a handful a few inches from his nose. The moment it beeped, JJ took it from his mouth. Hotch stayed in control until her hand was out of spraying range, then started sneezing. They weren't dramatic or "vocalized" at all-just congested and masculine.

"Hhhrrrsdch! HHHHRRsssh! HhhRSSSHdch! Hhkkkkssshtttt! Hhhhh HHHRSSHoo! TSCHoo! HhhhGGGSHuh! TSCHah! HHH'TSCH'oo! HhhhggSH! Uhh...hihhhh...hhhhh...hhuh..."The fit halted for a moment, giving JJ a moment to swap a few dry tissues for the drenched ones, and left her wincing in sympathy as Hotch sat, his face awash in pure ticklish misery. He held the tissues in both hands a few inches from his seizing nostrils, breath hitching softly and red nose twitching and flaring. Finally, he pitched forward with a violent sneeze that made the bed jerk, followed by several others. "Hhh...AAAAAATTSCHuhh! HHHrssshooo! TSCHOO! Hhhtsch! Hhggggnsh! Hhh'PSSH'uuhh!" He stayed doubled forward, elbows resting on his knees and tissues held against his nose, for a few seconds, taking his time to catch his breath. Then, he blew his nose with a congested, almost painful, sound, which led to a juicy, rattling coughing fit. JJ watched in concern, unable to do anything but sit by with the water glass, unsure of whether or not she should touch him. At last, his breathing settled.

"Sorry." He rasped, pressing a hand to his forehead. That prompted JJ to look down at the thermometer's reading: 102.4. Still high, but significantly lower than it had been.

"Hey, it's not your fault." She chided gently. "Everyone gets sick." He gave a weak noise of agreement, and leaned forward, exhaustion obvious in his body language. JJ decided to try to get him to eat something before he fell back asleep. "Are you hungry? Do you want soup, or pretzels, or something like that?"

Hotch shook his head slightly, turning even paler than before.

"No, thank you. I'm not hungry." JJ couldn't say she blamed him-after vomiting multiple times, food would be the last thing she would want, too. She really wanted to get some medicine into his system to bring down his fever, though, and she couldn't do that if his stomach was empty.

"What about tea? It might help settle your stomach."

Hotch looked at JJ in mild surprise, which turned to confusion and embarrassed apprehension. He seemed to think for a moment before disregarding her question and asking one of his own.

"JJ? How...how long have you been here?"

JJ had to check her phone to answer that. It was barely Saturday, which made it somewhere around 18 hours sitting with Hotch, trying to keep his fever and nightmares to a minimum.

"Around 18 hours." She answered quietly. "You were really not doing well-I wanted to make sure you'd be okay."

Now that he was lucid enough to be embarrassed, Hotch looked completely mortified and uncomfortable.

"I...thank you...that really wasn't necessary-" He gave a liquid, congested sniff which triggered a tingly itch deep in his sinuses that sent him scrambling for the tissues as he sneezed into one hand, loosely cupped around his mouth and nose.

"HhhhGGTSCHoo! TTTSCHiio! KKKTSHuh! HhhhgnnGSHuh! Hhhh...hihh...HHHTKSH! HHPSH! TSCHHahh!" Another torturous, bone-rattling cough left him winded, gasping, and exhausted when it ended nearly a minute later with a drink of water and a honking nose blow. JJ felt awful for him-his throat sounded painful, he looked absolutely miserable, and his nose was red and sore looking, with a damp look around the edges. His nostrils twitched and flared constantly, and he had rubbed his nose multiple times since waking up-apparently, this flu was determined to make him as uncomfortable as possible.

"Bless you, Hotch." She murmured sympathetically, standing up and turning on the Keurig machine in the hotel room to make a cup of tea.

"Thagk you." His voice sounded so hoarse and raspy that JJ could almost feel her own twinge in sympathy-it sounded awful. The water poured into the cup, and she dropped the tea bag in to steep, exhausted and feeling awkward about putting her boss in a position where his vulnerability had been exposed. She had no doubt that, had they not had a case, Aaron would have given his team time off and curled up, alone, to suffer in peace.

Hotch, for his part, couldn't seem to go a minute without coughing or sneezing now that he was awake. While JJ let the tea steep and stood near the small "kitchen"(which was merely a mini fridge, microwave, and Keurig situated on or around a table and two backed stools), Hotch sneezed four times in three minutes.

"HhhhGNISHoo!"

"TSSHoo!"

"Hhh...hhhKTSCHuh!"

"HGNSH!"

Each time, JJ blessed him kindly, more worry creeping into her voice after the final sneeze caused yet another rattling cough that took a bit to get under control. When she set the mug down on the nightstand, and saw how pale and sick her friend looked, she couldn't resist the temptation to put a hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, Hotch...you sound awful!" She murmured, passing him the tissues and feeling his forehead nearly simaltaneously.

"Thadk you." He said, a hint of a laugh in his voice. It was obvious that he was rapidly starting to feel worse, though, the longer he was awake.

"You know that's not what I meant." She said with a chuckle. "I just meant that you seem like you feel miserable." Her boss hesitated before nodding slightly and shutting his eyes, still wiping at his very irritated, ticklish nose. JJ continued. "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, but do you think that you should see a doctor?"

"Ndo. It's just-hhh...hihhhh...-just a cold...Hhhh'KTSCH!" They waited for a moment, then Aaron lowered the tissues and sighed softly, both happy that the sneeze had come alone.

JJ shifted so that she was looking him right in the eye, and though her voice was calm when she spoke, it had a decidedly stern, motherly tone to it.

"Hotch. You've had a fever over 102 degrees for three days. You vomited repeatedly. You look like a ghost. You collapsed, for pete's sake! It is not just a cold." This time, Hotch knew better than to argue back. In truth, he was incredibly touched that JJ was here.

"Okay, it's ndot just a cold." He conceded. "It feels like the flu, but I'mb finde. I dond't ndeed to see a doctor." JJ nodded.

She was relieved that Hotch wasn't fighting her concerns. She knew it was hard for him to admit vulnerability, but she also knew he needed to, especially right now. He was struggling so much more than he was willing to admit with Haley's murder, and her proof was how ill he had gotten. Although she really wanted to discuss his feelings, she also could tell by how pale Aaron had gotten that he needed to be laying down and resting.

"Well, if you aren't up for anything, why don't you go back to bed, and you can see how you're feeling in the morning?" As much as he hated to admit it, the unit chief thought that sounded incredibly appealing. He was becoming more and more dizzy and sick-feeling the longer he was upright, and he was exhausted. He nodded, and laid back down, only to prop himself up again to sneeze into a hastily-snatched handful of tissues.

"Heh'GSSH! HDSCHuh! RSSHuh! 'TSCHah! Hhh'ESHHHuh! HHGDSCH!" Blowing his nose produced a horrible, congested sound, and led to a long, hacking fit of coughing. When he opened his eyes again, JJ was holding out the glass of water-she'd refilled it.

"Here, take a drink." She said, her voice kind and eyes warm and worried. He nodded, only managing a hoarse croak when handing the glass back.

"Thadk you." She nodded.

"Anytime. Now, get some rest-hopefully, the worst of this is behind you."

He wanted so badly to be more stoic, and to insist that JJ leave, but he was exhausted and so tired of fighting...Hotch found himself nodding off within seconds. The last thing that registered was a cool, soft hand on his forehead, stroking his hair, and he felt just a little bit more okay.

March 26, 2015

<3

April 10, 2015

:-) so good, so very good :-)

April 13, 2015

Wow! Sick Hotch is adorable! I feel so bad that he's suffering, but this is an amazing read!

September 18, 2016

Hi everyone, I know it's been a while and I'm sorry for my absence. Things have been really hard for me and when that happens I lose inspiration to write. I've started and restarted this update too many times to count, and I'm still not happy with it, but it's the best I can do right now and I'm sorry about that. There is no sneezing, this is just a "filler" chapter to get to the next main section of the story. I know how I want it to end, it's working backwards and filling in the middle that's taking some time. Thank you so much for your patience and support with all my stories. I promise I'm working hard on them, but things are very busy and I don't have much time to write.

The next time JJ woke, light was seeping in through the cracks around the curtain, and she was disoriented for a moment as to where she was. She sat up in the chair, wincing as her stiff limbs protested the movement, and her head pounded slightly. Gingerly, she stood and walked to the bathroom, and made a face as she caught sight of herself in the mirror. She looked as bad as she felt. Her hair was still in a damp, messy bun from her shower the day before, and her face was pale from lack of sleep. Without makeup, she looked young and tired. Dark shadows ringed her eyes, another indicator of how little rest she'd been getting, and she looked exhausted. She felt it too. Sleeping in the chair had produced aches in her limbs, and her head throbbed, probably from dehydration. With a sigh of unhappiness, she filled a cup with water, ignoring the slight soreness of her throat on the way down. Sleeping in the chair hadn't been a smart move-she was sore all over. In addition, she could tell that the hotel air was getting to her upper respiratory system. Her throat was irritated from the dryness and she made a mental note to stay hydrated throughout the day as she stepped quietly back into the bedroom.

It occurred to her as she sat down in the chair again that she hadn't eaten in quite a while. Surprisingly, she wasn't particularly hungry-in fact, just the opposite. Still, she knew she should get something. She was about to pick up the phone to text Rossi when it lit up with a text from the man himself.

I'm coming over in five minutes to relieve you. You need to get something to eat and relax.

JJ smiled. Rossi was direct and she appreciated that. She also appreciated that he looked out for her. All too often, she bent over backwards to care for the others on the team, usually neglecting herself in the process, and Rossi always made sure someone was doing the same for her. She fired off a reply.

Thanks Dave-you're the best. I'll crack the door.

There would be no need for him to reply, so she pocketed the phone at the same time as she stood and moved across the room to open the door a crack. She didn't want Hotch to wake up to a knock-this was the longest he'd been sleeping, and she was determined to let him get the rest he so desperately needed. It wasn't worth it to go sit down in the chair and stand back up again, so she stepped into the hall and leaned against the wall, arms crossed as she waited for Rossi.

He emerged from a room several doors down less than two minutes later, and walked towards her with a concerned frown on his face.

"You look like hell." Were the first words he said to her. JJ would have tried to deny it, but knew that would do no good with Rossi. She knew what she looked like and she appreciated that he didn't sugar coat it.

"Yeah, I know. I haven't slept well." He nodded, eyes scanning her and taking in the redness and dark circles around her eyes and the pallor of her skin, then reached and touched her forehead with the back of his hand.

"No fever, that's good. Go get something to eat and then take a nap-I've got it covered for a while." She made a noise of agreement.

"I'm not sick Dave, just tired."

"So you say. You're running yourself into the ground and the flu is highly contagious. Go take care of yourself." JJ crossed her arms and gave him her best glare, which he wasn't fazed by,

"I'm fine."

"For now." He responded with a wry smile. She rolled her eyes and started down the hall.

"I'll be back soon."

"Don't rush!" The older man called after her. "Rest!" JJ half turned and pulled a face, but kept walking. She reached her own room and ducked inside, letting out a sigh of relief. She hadn't realized how tense she was with worry over her boss until she'd had a chance to get away, and she rolled her shoulders backwards to try to release the knots as she got undressed and stepped into the shower.

The warm water felt good on her sore body, and eased the tension in her neck. She rolled her head around, relishing the feeling of calm that was finally descending. It had been an exhausting few days and she was relieved to finally have a few moments to herself.

Stepping out of the shower, she was aware of how tired she was. It felt like her eyes were heavy and gritty, and she rubbed them gently to try to wake herself up. She knew she needed to go get food, but sleep sounded better. With a sigh, she did the responsible adult thing, threw on a clean pair of yoga pants and a different sweatshirt, and headed downstairs to the dining area.

Breakfast had been laid out, and there were people milling around at the different stations. She felt her stomach turn at the scent of the eggs, and quickly moved on to the cereal bar. Nothing looked particularly appealing, but she grabbed a single-serve box of Cheerios, a glass of milk, and a to-go cup of coffee before walking back to the dining area to sit down. As she was finding a seat, she spotted the rest of the team sitting at a table in the corner, and she paused momentarily, unsure of whether to join them. The problem was solved for her when Morgan spotted her and waved.

"JJ! Over here!" She forced a smile that she hoped looked convincing and walked towards them.

"Hey guys." As she got closer, she could feel several sets of eyes scanning her face, and she felt heat rising in her cheeks. She knew she looked tired, but was it really that bad? Apparently it was, judging by Prentiss' reaction.

"Oh, Jayje, you look exhausted. Have you slept at all?" JJ nodded and sat down in the chair Morgan had pulled out for her. Sitting was a relief. Standing had drained the little energy she had left, and she took a long sip of coffee before responding.

"Not much, but I'll live."

"You're very pale." Reid said, a furrow between his brows as his analytic mind raced, connecting any and all pieces of information that her face gavd him. "And you look like you're in pain. Do you have a headache?" Her head bobbed before she could stop herself. Shit. She might as well have thrown chum in the shark-filled water for as much as profilers would pounce on that. As expected, they took it and ran. Prentiss and Morgan exchanged looks.

"Are you feeling okay? You do look...rough." Emily said, stretching across the table to put a hand on her forehead. JJ leaned back and batted it away, trying to keep her bubbling irritation at bay. She knew she was just tired and that that was why she was close to snapping, and she was determined to avoid saying or doing something in the heat of the moment that she'd regret later.

"I'm fine. I'm exhausted, I haven't eaten in...I don't even know how long, and I'm sure it's just low blood sugar. Some coffee, food, and a nap and I'll be fine. I promise." Skepticism was written all over their faces, and she forced herself to count to ten. Why did everyone think she was sick? As she thought, though, she wondered if they were on to something. She was achy and felt much more tired than she usually did after several days of little sleep. No, no, she was fine. A little more coffee and a nap and you'll be fine. You are NOT sick, you're just tired, and that's that. Now if only she could believe herself...

She forced herself away from that train of thought and opened the Cheerios, peeling off the lid before pouring some of the milk into the plastic cup. Sitting around feeling irritated wasn't going to get her anywhere. She needed to get something in her stomach then go take a nap, and then she would be fine. "Fine" was apparently the word of the day for her mind: it was her mantra. You are fine. You are fine. You are fine.

"So, what are your plans for the day?" She finally asked, unable to stand the uncomfortable silence. Her cereal didn't taste good. The hoops were too sweet and the milk was too rich, but she knew leaving her breakfast untouched like her stomach wanted her to would result in nagging from the team, and besides, Prentiss was likely to tattle to Rossi if she didn't eat. Dutifully, she forced down another spoonful.

"Honestly? I'm watching soaps and finishing my paperwork." Emily said with a sheepish smile. Morgan groaned.

"Seriously? Please tell me you're not actually hooked on 'the young and the ugly' or whatever the heck it's called."

"The Young and the Restless." She said with a frown. "If you're going to mock me, at least get your facts right. Please, tell me what YOUR plans are, Mr. Smartaleck." JJ cracked a smile, and took another sip of coffee. Immediately, she set it down, the bitterness too much for her to handle. She missed what Morgan said he was going to do as her mind sent her an SOS.

Shit. You're sick. Good going JJ, really good.

Abruptly, she pushed her chair back, suddenly too tired and overwhelmed to deal with the noise of the crowded breakfast room. She needed to sleep and take the edge off whatever this was. She could be sick when they got back home. Will could take Henry and she could take a day or two off to deal with it. Right now, she needed to be strong. Hotch needed someone right now and she could handle this for another 24 hours.

"JJ? Are you okay? You've barely touched your cereal." Reid piped up, peering at her tray. She forced a smile that didn't reach her eyes.

"I'm fine. I'm just tired, I need to sleep. I'll catch up with you guys later." With that, she stood, ignoring the way her head swam, and took her tray to the trash can before grabbing the cup and heading towards the elevator. When she reached it, she pushed the button to go upstairs and forced herself to stand upright, aware that the team still had a clear view of her. Only when she stepped inside did she allow herself to sag against the wall, suddenly completely drained of energy. Once the doors had opened, she walked down the hall, so tired she felt dizzy, before swiping her keycard and stepping inside the hotel room. She was too tired to do anything but kick off her shoes and set an alarm before she crawled under the covers and fell asleep.

September 19, 2016

I'm so sorry you've been having a tough time lately, but wow this is amazing!!! I hope to read more soon...a sick Hotch AND sick JJ...amazing

November 24, 2016

On September 19, 2016 at 0:50 AM, metallicstars said:

I'm so sorry you've been having a tough time lately, but wow this is amazing!!! I hope to read more soon...a sick Hotch AND sick JJ...amazing

Thank you very much, that means a lot to me that you care! I'm glad you like the story.

I have already started the next chapter of the story, but it switches view points so I decided to split this update into two chapters. I'm trying to finish my CM stories as quickly as possible while still writing them "well"(or at least to the best of my ability). I am really excited about the upcoming chapters of this one. I hope you guys like this, any feedback is appreciated. I promise there will be more sneezing in the very near future!

JJ woke to the sound of her phone ringing, and quickly registered that she felt far worse than when she'd gone to bed. She rolled over and sat up, immediately fighting a wave of dizziness, barely managing to pick the phone up to her ear before the spinning room forced her onto her back again.

"Hello?" It was barely audible-hardly a squeak-and she cleared her throat before trying again, more successfully this time. "Sorry, hello?"

"JJ, what the hell? You were supposed to call yesterday if you weren't going to be home. I thought the case was done!" Will's voice was angry and the volume sent stabs of pain through her aching head.

"Will, I know, I'm sorry, things were just-" He cut her off just as her nose began to tingle.

"I don't really care. You can save it for-"

"HhhNGSH!" She did her best to stifle it, but it was incredibly strong. Her ex-husband stopped mid-sentence.

"Jennifer? What was that?" His voice was guarded, and she got the sense he regretted losing his temper.

"Nothidng, Will." It came out defeated and exhausted, and she felt tears spring to her eyes. God, how tired am I if I'm crying? She was miserable. Now that she'd been awake for a few minutes, she was aware of how terrible she felt. Instead of easing like she'd hoped they would, the exhaustion and aches had only intensified while sleeping, leaving her feeling worse than before her nap.

"Are you okay? You're not sick, are you?" His voice was concerned, and JJ felt something clench inside her. It had been months since he'd spoken to her like that, and hearing the warmth creep back into his chilly voice was bitter sweet.

"No Will, I'm fine." She said quietly. The congestion wasn't awful, but it was there. She felt a cough rising in her throat, the itchy tickle rushing from her chest and lungs up to the back of her mouth.

"Will, I-" She tried to keep it in, but couldn't manage to hold it back. Hastily, she placed the phone on the bed, rolled over from her back onto her stomach, and coughed harshly into the pillow. Each one was jagged and ripped at her tender throat, the congestion in her chest rattling lightly. It hurt her head, turning the baseline of aching, throbbing pain into a sharp stab in her skull. JJ wasn't sure how long it took for the fit to cease, but it was long enough that when she picked up the phone, Will had hung up.

With a sigh, she turned slowly onto her back and pressed her hands over her eyes. Her hands were shaking as she lifted them, and she just let herself take stock of her aches and pains.

Her head was pounding, with what felt like a tension headache in her temples and neck, and a sick headache everywhere else. The congestion in her nose had thickened, irritating her sensitive sinuses further, and moved down into her chest, making it harder to breathe. In addition, the rawness in her throat had turned into a sharp pain that made it difficult to swallow, and caused a raspiness in her voice. Her stomach was the best part of her-it was unsettled but not sick, while her limbs ached deep in her bones and felt like lead. At least she didn't seem to have a fever yet. That would be the first thing Rossi would pick up on.

Okay, enough Jennifer. Pull yourself together. This is just like if Henry were sick. You can take care of yourself later. Right now, go help Hotch.

With a sigh, she sat up again-although much more slowly-and swung her legs over the side. She braced her hands on the bed beside her knees, trying to ignore the dizziness and fatigue that wanted to pull her back down to the pillow. Bursts of white and black sparkled in her eyes, staining her vision while she waited for her body to adjust. When she felt steady enough, she put a hand on the nightstand and stood. Although she swayed, she stayed on her feet.

She forced herself to walk towards the bathroom, although everything in her was screaming for her to lie back down. The light she flipped on was significantly brighter than the dull light in the bedroom, and she almost didn't have time to bring her hands to her face to catch the ensuing three sneezes.

"Hhh...hhhHEPchuh! ECKSHuh! IPSHoo!" She sneezed lightly into steepled hands, the spasms breathy but powerful. After the last one, she remained in that position for a moment, unsure of if she needed to sneeze again. For now, her body seemed content, and she lowered her hands as she moved to the sink to wash them.
The warmth of the water felt good on her hands, and she let the water run over them long after the soap had been rinsed off. Finally, she turned the tap off and wiped her hands on the fluffy towel, before raising her head and looking in the mirror.

She bit her lip at her appearance. Her face was paler than before her nap, and her eyes looked exhausted and dull. The circles around them looked dark and the bags were heavy. Without makeup, she looked exhausted and much younger.

With a sigh, she reached for her makeup bag and pulled out her foundation, eyeliner, and mascara.

"Okay JJ. You just have to get through one more day, and then you can be sick all you want." She said aloud. They had received notice that, barring unforeseen circumstances, they would be flying back to Quantico the next evening at 8 pm. The storm was predicted to move out around 9 the next morning, but flights would be delayed for several hours as the runways were cleared and earlier flights sent first.

With that in mind, she took a deep breath and began preparing for the day. It took her longer than usual to do her makeup due to the shakiness of her hands, but the end result was good. The combination of foundation, concealer, and strategically applied eyeliner lifted her face and made her look much more awake. Once her hair was brushed and in a loose bun, she appeared pulled together and could easily pass as simply tired. The trick was going to be keeping her voice from giving her away. Right now, she sounded okay. A little croaky and congested, but the hoarseness could be explained as exhaustion. As long as she didn't cough or sneeze around Rossi, she figured she'd be okay.

After a final glance in the mirror, she turned off the light and left the bathroom to change into fresh clothes. She always overpacked, and this time she was very happy about it. Quickly, JJ sorted through the options and settled on a soft, oversized sweater and a pair of black yoga pants. It was casual, but still within the realm of looking nice, which would make it easier to convince Rossi she was "tired".

With a sigh, she sat down on the edge of the bed and pulled out her phone to text Rossi that she was coming over.

I'm heading back.

Not bothering to wait for a reply, she pocketed the device and stood up again, ignoring the throbbing of her head and the bone-weary exhaustion threatening to pull her back into bed. Her head felt floaty and she just needed to rest-no, she was fine. Hotch, JJ. Focus on Hotch. You can deal with another day.

With that, she strode out the door and pulled it shut behind her before heading back to the room she'd spent the majority of the last two days in. She was about halfway there when the door opened and Rossi stepped out. He caught sight of her and frowned.

"Good to see you too, Dave."' Her voice was sarcastic, but thankfully no different than usual-yet.

"Did you sleep and eat?" He asked. She nodded, ignoring the way the movement made her feel off balance.

"Yep, and had water." She'd had coffee, but he didn't need to know that. Rossi smiled and placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Good for you. You feeling okay?"

"Just a little tired, but I'll be fine once I can get a good night's sleep."

Rossi narrowed his eyes at her, but didn't say anything. She did her best to keep her face blank, hoping he wouldn't realize she was lying. Truthfully, that was a long shot. Rossi was exceedingly perceptive, perhaps the most perceptive besides Hotch of the team, and it didn't take a profiler to know that she was sick. Still, she wasn't going to give in and let the focus be shifted to her! Avoidance maneuvers. Distract.

As she was wracking her brain, Rossi spoke.

"JJ, something's not right. What's going on?"

"Will called. It wasn't a happy conversation." She said. It was true, but not the real problem.

Rossi's eyes filled with sympathy, and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She fought the urge to flinch, but couldn't keep herself from stiffening.

"I'm sorry Bella. What can I do?"

She sighed. What could he do?

"I don't know anymore Dave. I just don't." Tears began to prickle behind her eyes, and she forced them back. Jennifer, get a grip. "I'm fine. I'll be fine, let's just focus on Hotch."

Her friend gave her his trademark smug look of "I know you're not fine", but held the door open and allowed her to walk in anyway.

JJ stepped quietly through the doorway, hesitant to make any noise at all in case she roused her boss. He was curled on his side beneath a second comforter that had been added to the bed in the time she'd been gone, and appeared to still be asleep. Though Hotch wasn't snoring, he was breathing heavily, and she could hear the congestion rattling. Any concern for herself went out the window as she switched into "mother mode".

"How long has he been asleep?" She asked quietly, keeping her voice low and soft.

"Two hours." Rossi replied, matching her pitch. "He woke up shortly after you left, but after I'd had him take an ibuprofen he went back to bed." The blonde chewed her lip, embarrassed that she'd slept that long. "He asked where you were. He thought you'd left because of what he said to you."

Her heart clenched for several reasons. First of all, she felt bad making Hotch feel bad. Secondly, she was worried about his emotional fragility, and hoped that this wouldn't add to the guilt he was already carrying. Finally, it stirred up the painful memories.

All you do is make things worse.

She shook her head to clear it and immediately regretted that decision. The room tilted around her and she had to make a conscious effort not to wobble. Whoa, okay, bad decision.

"Did he drink anything?" Rossi sighed and rolled his eyes.

"A few sips of water with the pills, but not much. I tried but he couldn't be coerced." JJ looked at the ceiling.

"Typical male. You know he'd be making Jack drink, but when it comes to taking care of himse-"

"Says the pot to the kettle." Dave had a raised eyebrow smirk, and she couldn't help but look sheepish.

"Okay, okay, fair point." She was even more determined to not let Rossi know she didn't feel well, as she knew it was her fault she'd gotten sick. Admittedly, she hadn't been smart. She'd stayed up far too many hours in the last 36 hours, eaten very little, managed to dehydrate herself, and spent every silent moment beating herself up for what was going on in her personal life. She had no right to complain since she'd brought this upon herself, and she was determined to keep herself together. With that thought in mind, she squared her shoulders and forced her mind out of self-pity mode. If she believed she was fine, she would be fine. It was that simple.

"Should we wake him and try and get him to eat something?" JJ asked, furrowing her brow. Of course she wanted to let him sleep, but she also wanted to keep him strong and hydrated to give his exhausted body the strength to fight this off. Rossi thought about it for a minute, then nodded. JJ cautiously approached the bed, and keeping an arm up to block a swing should her boss go into defense mode, gently touched his shoulder. He didn't stir.

"Hotch, hey Hotch, can you wake up?"

Still nothing. She smoothed the hair off of his forehead with the palm of her hand, furrowing her brow at the heat radiating from the pale skin, before moving her hand back to his shoulder to squeeze it lightly.

"Aaron, you need to wake up. I know you're-"

Reminiscent of several-was it hours? Maybe days. Wait, no...whatever, it didn't matter. Time didn't have meaning anymore. Anyway, reminiscent of a recent moment, Hotch sat bolt upright, only to slump sideways as the fever (and dehydration) induced dizziness overcame him. JJ quickly scooted closer and pressed her hand on his chest, trying to get him to stay down, but he fought against her.

"Haley? Jack? I'b cobmidng-" Her heart broke for him.

"Whoa, hey, easy Hotch. Easy easy easy, you're okay, I promise. Shh, just breathe." He struggled against her, desperately trying to sit up.

"Where's Jack?" Gently, she rubbed his shoulder.

"He's safe. He's at home, don't worry."

That didn't calm him. His eyes, bleary with sleep and bright with fever, were still wild.

"Haley? Is Haley okay?"

JJ looked at Rossi, unsure of what to say. He spread his hands, and she turned back to her boss.

"Hotch..." She said gently. "Haley's dead."

December 15, 2016

I was so glad to see this update!! Can't wait to read more

January 11, 2017

On 12/15/2016 at 2:27 AM, metallicstars said:

I was so glad to see this update!! Can't wait to read more

Thank you very much! I hope you enjoy this next part!

I know that this part is out of character-I'm intending it that way. I'm writing this based on my experiences with depression coupled with fevers, not based on any episodes. I'm not someone who typically loses control in front of others, but two years ago I got the flu and didn't realize it. I was at school and dealing with the death of a friend, and I had a breakdown, which is what I am basing Hotch's struggles on. I'm not happy with how I'm writing at this point. I'm sorry guys, I just don't know how to fix it.

Blood. There was so much blood everywhere. Where was Jack? He had to get to Jack. Someone was calling his name. Was it Haley? Where was she?

He lurched upwards, trying to get out of bed and get to his family. Were they okay? Something was wrong. Everything hurt, he couldn't breathe, he didn't recognize where he was. What the hell was going on?

Soft, cool hands were on him, easing him back down. He struggled, fighting himself and someone else to sit up.

"Haley? Jack? I'b combidng-" Harsh coughing began to tear at his throat, rubbing his aching chest raw. He didn't remember being sick, but he felt like death warmed over.

"Whoa, hey, easy Hotch. Easy easy easy, you're okay, I promise. Shh, just breathe." The voice sounded like JJ's. What on earth was going on? Where was Jack? He had this horrible feeling that his son wasn't safe.

"Where's Jack?" Aaron choked out, his voice raspy and an octave lower than it usually was. He couldn't focus on JJ's face as the room spun, but he could hear her voice.

"He's safe. He's at home, don't worry."

"Haley? Is Haley okay?" He forced himself up onto his elbow, trying to swing his legs over the side of the bed. JJ put her hands firmly on his shoulders and kept him in a seated position.

"Hotch..." He could hear tears in her voice and felt tears spring to his own eyes. "Haley's dead."

Instantly, the events of the last months hit him like a train. Foyet. Finding Haley dead in a pool of blood on the ground. Jack screaming that his mother was gone. The awful depression, the hopelessness, the struggling to make it through each day.

And then the events of this case. The similarity of the bodies. The way he'd yelled at JJ. Her eyes swimming in tears. How she'd sat with him and held him while he'd wept. He didn't understand it, how could she care so much when all he'd done was hurt her?

He bent forward and put his head on his knees, tears streaking down his cheeks. The bed rocked as JJ shifted closer to him, and he felt her slim arm wrap around his shoulders.

"I'm sorry Hotch, I'm so sorry." Her voice was thick and only made him cry harder. Part of him was embarrassed over how he was breaking down, but a larger part of him couldn't care less. What did it matter? Being tough wouldn't bring Jack's mother back, the woman who had been the love of his life. He didn't deserve this treatment though. He knew he'd hurt JJ, why was she still nice to him?

"Please, just stop." He sobbed, trying to pull away from her. She refused to let him go, and it was like she'd read his mind when she spoke again. Her voice was insistent and filled with passion, and he could tell she was crying too.

"I'm not letting go, Aaron. I'm here and I'm not leaving you to suffer alone. You need to believe that this isn't your fault."

He shook his head slowly back and forth, feeling lost and broken. How could she still care after all he'd done? He was the reason Haley was dead. He was the reason JJ had cried. He was the reason for so many deaths on cases. If he'd just been smarter, just connected the dots more quickly...

JJ was rubbing slow circles on his back, her left hand resting on his shoulder. He was aware that he was making a fool of himself, but he couldn't have cared less. He wished he'd never existed, the world would have been better off.

"Shh, Aaron, just breathe. You have to breathe." For the second time in several days, he was suddenly aware that he coughing uncontrollably. Hotch sucked in a breath, and choked on it, coughing harder.

"JJ, what can I do?" Rossi? Oh god...was everyone there?

"Can you get a glass of water?" He heard her say. He didn't want water. He deserved to suffocate, not be cared for. JJ's hand was massaging his tense, aching muscles. "Shh, Hotch, you're okay, you're okay. Just breathe."

"I'm sorry-" He choked out, the words a sob. He could feel JJ shaking as he held him.

"Please, Aaron..." She put her head on his shoulder and her arms around him, holding him as he sobbed like a three year old. He was coughing all over her and yet she didn't seem to care.

"JJ, I have the water." Rossi's voice was calm. Nothing seemed to faze him.

"Can you turn on the light?" She asked. He nodded, and Hotch heard the switch flip. His head was in his arms, resting on his knees, but he heard JJ take in a breath and felt her spasm three times against him. Dave didn't comment, but whether he noticed or not was uncertain. "Hotch, can you sit back?" He lifted his head and leaned back against the headboard, still coughing that awful, bone-rattling cough. It jarred his aching body, sending sharp stabs of pain through him, but he deserved it. JJ was pressing the glass into his shaking hand, and he lifted it to his lips. At first, he spluttered, but then the water worked its magic and the coughing eased, then ceased.

He looked up to see JJ looking at him with concern that made his heart melt. Tears sparkled in her beautiful eyes, redness around their rims and her nose showing that she was truly crying. She blinked and tears cascaded down her pale cheeks, streaking her foundation and taking mascara along with them.

"Oh Aaron...I'm sorry." She said softly, her voice dripping with her trademark mix of concern and love. Her slim hand took his and squeezed it gently.

"Why do you care?" It came out flat, but exhausted and broken at the same time. He saw her flinch as if she'd been punched, but she took her time before answering, rubbing her thumb over his hand to fill the silence.

"Hotch...I could never not care. You're one of my best friends. It-" her voice broke, and she put her other hand over her mouth for a moment, tears running freely down her face. "It hurts to see you hurt. To lose someone you love...it's the hardest thing."

For the first time, it came through. JJ had lost someone. That was why she cared, how she knew what to say, how she seemed to have meaning behind her words.

"Who?" He asked. It was all his voice could manage. One word, yet there was so much meaning behind it.

"My sister." She whispered, and her shoulders shook with a sob. "Please believe me, I care, I know this is hard, but God, Hotch, please stay alive. Jack needs you, the team needs you, I need you." Her words trembled and trailed off, and he realized just how his pain was affecting her. She knew what he was going through. She understood the guilt, the despair, the wish to be the one who had died instead. She knew. And he'd dismissed her, but she was still there.

"Jeddifer, I'b so sorry-" he choked out. She shook her head.

"It's okay, it's all okay." He knew that she wasn't just talking about her sister, she was absolving him of any wrongdoings over the last few days. She was forgiving him when he didn't deserve it.

He was about to speak, tell her that it wasn't okay, that he regretted hurting her, when the urge to sneeze crept up on him.

"HHHRSHuh! TTSCHuh! RSHuh!" It was just a triple, but the sneezes felt like they were wrenched from his body. The whole bed shook with them.

"Bless."

"Salud." JJ and Rossi spoke at the same time.

"On that note, you need to take more medicine." Dave said, his voice mildly different from how it usually sounded. Hotch looked at him, and could see that his eyes were glistening. From the bed, he couldn't be sure, but it looked like he was crying too. Well, teary, but that for Rossi was basically the equivalent of sobbing for a typical human.

JJ nodded her agreement, and pulled a blister pack of pills from the nightstand.

"How is your stomach?" She asked, cupping the capsules in her palm as she played the mother. He thought about it, surprised. Memories from the last days popped into his mind. Lying on the bathroom floor. Smelling coffee. Trash cans between his knees.

"It's fidne." The word was heavily distorted by congestion, and he reached for the tissues on the bedside table, suddenly aware that he was still crying. She nodded, but didn't hand him the medications-it looked like DyQuil, but he couldn't be sure.

"Do you think you can eat something?" Her voice caught and she cleared her throat gently.

"Ndo." Food was the last thing he wanted. He just wanted to go to sleep and not think about all of this. Even sleep was no relief, though. The dreams were vivid.

JJ touched his forehead lightly with the back of her hand, furrowing her brow as she did so.

"You're really warm. I understand if you can't eat, although you really need to, but can you at least drink? I'm willing to bet you're dehydrated." Hotch nodded, sending a shooting spike through his temples, and lifted the glass of water to his lips again. JJ passed him the capsules, and he took them gratefully. They scraped his aching throat on the way down, but he was glad. He deserved to hurt.

Rossi spoke again, his voice steady and calm.

"Can I get you anything Aaron?" His heart constricted. They shouldn't care.

"Ndo, but thadnks." It came out defeated and so quiet that his two friends could barely hear it.

His head was aching badly. Every time he moved it sent a sharp stab of pain through his skull, morphing from a dull throb to a feeling like someone was scraping his brain. He couldn't help but wince as he turned his head to put the glass on the nightstand. JJ noticed.

"Hotch, why don't you lie down again?" She asked. Too exhausted and low to fight it, he let JJ guide him so that he was resting on his back again. A shiver went down his spine. He felt weak and exhausted.

Warm covers were drawn over his chest, all the way up to his chin. JJ had untangled them and was smoothing them gently, just like he did when Jack was sick. She dimmed the light, and he closed his eyes. Aaron felt the bed move as she stood up, and his eyes snapped open again. Why was she leaving? He didn't want to be alone with this.

"JJ?" He called, voice catching. Rossi spoke gently.

"She'll be right back."

A moment later, the young woman emerged from the bathroom, holding a washcloth. She sat back down on the edge of the bed, right by his torso, and smiled at him.

"Can you close your eyes?" He let them shut, too tired to fight her, and she draped the folded washcloth over his eyelids. It was cool and damp, and soothing. She tucked the covers a little more tightly around him, and he felt tears begin to course down his cheeks.

"JJ, please dodn't leave-" He begged. She touched his cheek gently, and spoke in a voice so calm and warm that he couldn't help but feel a little safe.

"I'm not going anywhere, Aaron. I'm right here."

He sensed her sincerity but couldn't get himself to relax, especially with Rossi in the room. His hands were cold and trembling underneath the blanket as his body began to drain the adrenaline, and the anxiety was making his heart beat rapidly, thumping painfully in his chest. Suddenly, JJ's hand was on his forehead, smoothing the hair off of it that was surely disgusting and damp with sweat.

"I'm here. I'm here. You're safe now, Jack is safe, no one can hurt you. You're going to be alright." Her voice was kind and he got the feeling that this was not the first time she'd given that speech. Tears slowly made their way down his cheeks as her touching words and kindness told him he wasn't the bad person he thought he was. JJ wiped them away gently with a tissue, only causing him to cry harder. He just couldn't understand why she was so sweet to him when all he'd done was push her away. She'd gotten out of the car she was driving him home in and stood in the bitter cold until she was shaking, and yet she acted like nothing had happened.

"I'b sorry-" He tried, but JJ put a finger up.

"Shh. I know you are, but it's okay. It's all okay." Her tone was so sincere that it made him feel a little more peaceful. Maybe it was okay. Maybe.

Something shut down in his brain, and the never-ending noise quieted. For a moment, there was a hint of peace.

JJ seemed to notice because, when he looked at her, there was a warmth to her gaze that hadn't been there in some time. She looked truly happy, and something told him it was because of the shift. Gently, she traced her hand down his cheek, feeling for a fever although they both knew he had one.

"Can I get you anything? You haven't eaten anything in a while." His heart clenched with grief immediately. He didn't deserve to eat. What was the point? The overwhelming depression that had lifted for the briefest moment came surging back, flooding his brain with guilt and doubt. Trying to hide the tears, he closed his eyes and tried to keep the liquid from spilling out. He didn't want to cry in front of JJ again. Unfortunately, the more he tried to stop the tears, the more they came.

JJ's gentle hand was wiping something soft on his face, and he opened his eyes to see her blotting his tears with a tissue.

"Oh, Hotch..." She said quietly, voice filled with love and compassion. He put a hand over his mouth, unable to keep himself from letting out a sob. He'd never felt this out of control in front of someone, and having two team members there to witness a breakdown was humiliating.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

JJ felt as if her heart would break watching her strong, stoic boss cry. He'd never so much as teared up in front of her, so to see him shaking with repressed sobs was gut wrenching. With a feather-light touch, she wiped away his tears with her thumb, repeating the action as more and more raced down his too warm skin.

"Aaron...I'm so sorry." She whispered, smoothing her left hand along his hairline, slightly above the now-warmed washcloth. The heat under her palm reminded her of how sick and fragile her boss was. She would give anything to fix this for him, but she knew from experience there was nothing anyone could do.

He suddenly jerked his hands up to his face and rolled onto his right side, body spasming with the force of a desperate fit of sneezes. Startled, she jerked her hand back, which he interpreted as being grossed out.

"S-hhhhh-reeeyESHuh! HUPSHuh! Evksh! HhhTSCHuh! NGSHoo! PSH!HSH!ETSCH!" When the fit finished and he had rolled into his back, he opened red rimmed eyes that were just visible above his steepled hands to find JJ looking at him with utter sympathy and concern in her eyes, not the disgust he was expecting(and deserved).

"Bless you, Hotch." Her voice was tender as she plucked a tissue from the box on the nightstand and handed it to him. He took it from her gratefully, thankful that there was very little mess. "Are you alright?"

"Yes." His was almost inaudible, but why was unknown. He'd like to pretend that it was the hoarseness, but JJ knew from experience that it was from raw emotion that wouldn't be silenced.

When JJ didn't speak again, he raised the tissues to his sore, red nose and blew harshly. It ached through his sinuses and sent sharp pinpricks of pressure through his skull. It also did nothing to relieve the congestion. The passages of his nose were seemingly swollen shut, and the actual mucus seemed barely there. As a result, blowing did very little. All it did was trigger a coughing fit that left his throat raw, chest tight, and head throbbing. Although it was short lived, it was exhausting and left him aching, trembling, drained.

He was suddenly aware of how cold the room was, and he turned into his left side, shifting so that his knees were drawn in as he attempted to conserve body heat. JJ noticed and pulled the covers more tightly about him, tucking them over his shoulders so that only his head was exposed. Her hands were warm as they touched his forehead-almost too warm-and he relaxed into the touch.

"Just rest Aaron. You'll feel better when you wake up." He let his eyes close, feeling the grit of the tears burning and digging into the raw lids. JJ placed the cloth back over them, soothing him enough to let his tense muscles relax. Somehow, someway, he slipped back into something deeper than a doze, but not by much.

January 13, 2017

This update is amazing! you write the emotions and interactions between Hotch and JJ so well! Please continue

February 3, 2017

Please continue! This update was great. Surely a sick JJ is soon to follow!

August 12

Oh goodness, I turn into an sickly, sneezy Aaron fan! Goodness me. I loved watching CM and the storyline with Haley was really sad and I must admit I cried too.

The Impending Storm: Criminal Minds (Mostly Hotch/JJ, a little of everyone else)

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