On a mission to get sick: my logs

[irishsneezeandkisses]

Awww, honey! It's okay! Come here. I think I know how you feel. I have a "friend" who does the same kinds of things to me, and I, just like you, can't say anything about it or get upset over it in front of people because I don't want to sound self-centered. But it's okay! We have each other.

p.s. i might have been stalking this thread since like the beginning of time.

[Hygge]

Awww, honey! It's okay! Come here. I think I know how you feel. I have a "friend" who does the same kinds of things to me, and I, just like you, can't say anything about it or get upset over it in front of people because I don't want to sound self-centered. But it's okay! We have each other.

p.s. i might have been stalking this thread since like the beginning of time.

<3 thanks not so bad today. It's good to get it out and then be able to just not care during the day when everyone's around hehe.

In sick related things I kind of have an update. Cousin woke me up today, didn't get much sleep. So we finished a job we had to do, got food, went to the store... Everything was fine. After we got home though my head started poundingggg. So lame. I hardly ever get headaches haha. And it was kind of okay for a while, then just got super tired and worn out, shaky and weak and stomach wasn't so happy :/ and I ended up having a fever, only like 100. But felt so awful xP now it's still pretty uncomfortable and my head hurts, but it's not as bad as it was earlier. Sadly noooo cold like symptoms at all whyyy.

[CHOCOLATE <3]

Awww, honey! It's okay! Come here. I think I know how you feel. I have a "friend" who does the same kinds of things to me, and I, just like you, can't say anything about it or get upset over it in front of people because I don't want to sound self-centered. But it's okay! We have each other.

In sick related things I kind of have an update. Cousin woke me up today, didn't get much sleep. So we finished a job we had to do, got food, went to the store... Everything was fine. After we got home though my head started poundingggg. So lame. I hardly ever get headaches haha. And it was kind of okay for a while, then just got super tired and worn out, shaky and weak and stomach wasn't so happy :/ and I ended up having a fever, only like 100. But felt so awful xP now it's still pretty uncomfortable and my head hurts, but it's not as bad as it was earlier. Sadly noooo cold like symptoms at all whyyy.

But at least it's something! I know how you feel though :/ as of right now I'm exhausted, nauseas and my side hurts, but no sneeziness

Booooooooooooooooooo

hahahaha

[Hygge]

Yeahhh being nauseous is the worst :/ and I wish my immune system was as weak as my stomach haha.

Today all is better. I didn't have much to eat yesterday cus I felt bleh and today didn't have anything until almost 11 PM. I didn't feel that much like eating for a while but everything is back to normal, no fever no nothing.

Fevers are so uncomfortable. I don't like it. Yet I don't want it to leave haha... I want to be sick :/

So I just want to update this somewhere because I haven't really talked to anyone about it... The weird complications with the ex are still around. But I started talking to a friend online... A guy that's also 21. He was friends with my cousin, actually haha. But we play an online game together, yeah dumb, and started skyping during our games. And skyping to give house tours and show what we were doing and just talking a lot. Super nice dude, but very far away, and I don't know if I want an online relationship, or if I even want to get into that at all right now with complicated bf ex haha.

I'm soooo picky with guys. Haha. I don't want to settle. I want romance, I want true love, and if i can't have that I'd rather be alone... But I would be sad about being alone haha. Point is, this dude is totally nice and funny and open. He's not some creep like most guys I meet, who just want to talk about who you've dated, if you've had sex, your body, gross stuff like that.. He just wants to know like my life. Like we talk about our jobs, college, where we've traveled, experiences we had as kids, shows we watch hahaha. Random boring crap and somehow it's interesting and meaningful and I love it. The only thing he's really told me is that I'm cute and he called me pumpkin when I was feeling lame yesterday lol.

So it's like, there's pressure cus idk if I want to be in a relationship right now. Idk what he wants out of a relationship. I don't know i could to long distance. There's stuff he doesn't know about me you know, and it's just like...will he still like me if he knows that? I don't even know why I'm so caught up in it, cus it doesn't even matter to me. But i really dont want to spoil the friendship xP

I know that has nothing to do with sneezing. We Skype like for hours sometimes and he hasn't sneezed, and I haven't during a call haha. So I wonderrr what that'll be like haha

This thread is my friggin diary. The second I bring up a possible love interest that I met online to someone like my sister, they'll laugh and tell me it's dangerous and a trap. Not like I would ever go visit him for one thing. My sister was even going on a freaking overnight camping trip 5 hours away with a group she just discovered online, but went to a meet up a week before the camping trip and turned out they were all 30 years older than us. And she would still judge me for meeting someone, getting to know them, seeing them and talking to them every day, and starting to like them over the course of like a month.

Also he is totally good looking... I haven't said anything to him xP I'm not a chaser. I actually even ignored it when he said that I'm cute... I just froze up and responded to some other part of the conversation instead xP like meeting someone online I was like, he's probably a chubby kid that lives with his parents or something. But no, he lives on his own with his dog and cat that are adorable lol, is nice and defined and just has a nice face and... I wouldn't mind if it worked out but... It would be so hard.

Ok ok ok I'm done rambling. I'm the worst rambler ever.

Edited May 29, 2014 by BubbleTea

[CHOCOLATE <3]

There's nothing wrong with not wanting to settle. You shouldn't settle, because you're amazing and deserve nothing but the best. I say just keep talking to him and see what happens.

I know the feeling :/ I want to stop being completely exhausted, but I want to be sick...so...it's a dilemma hahaha

[rodakemopetojoen]

I once had a friend who said that one night she was bored and ate a load of ice cubes from the ice cube tray, and claims that she woke up the next morning with a really bad cold. Not sure if this is a coincidence but she swears that was what caused it. Probably doesn't work but since you seem really willing to try anything you could give this a go next time you need a new 'get sick' technique!

[Hygge]

I once had a friend who said that one night she was bored and ate a load of ice cubes from the ice cube tray, and claims that she woke up the next morning with a really bad cold. Not sure if this is a coincidence but she swears that was what caused it. Probably doesn't work but since you seem really willing to try anything you could give this a go next time you need a new 'get sick' technique!

Thanks I think I would actually try this eventually. What would I have to lose right?

So things have been progressing with dude online. He's funny and sweet and tells me about his life ya know.. Like he's open. That's important to me. Complicated ex is the opposite of open, he just doesn't get it haha. He's just bad with communication and doesn't think about talking. That's his deal, fine, but further proves that I'm not meant for him. This online friend... Like I know more about him than my ex haha. I know his childhood, his past relationship, his family, his pets... He's told me all about em. With the ex, I dated him like for over a year, he never mentioned anything about his past and I'm not gonna just be like "so tell me about your past relationships" lol. But I still wanna know about it ya know..? So one day looking on his fb I see all of these pics with an ex of his that he never mentioned, him like cuddling her and kissing her and I know their relationship is long over, but still I'm like... Hurt by it. And the fact that he wouldn't even mention her, like he never even valued the relationship. And the fact that he knew openness is important to me, I trusted him and told him all about my past, but he never holds a conversation. It's like he's not a person... Really he's just not open and doesn't have a good memory and our values are different and that's fine. But I wish it wouldn't have gone on for so long, right? Kinda pointless if neither of us is ever going to change.

So dude online, I'm not like pushing any of it. I'm not chasing. Just letting him come to me if he happens to like me. And he'll say things like call me cutie, he told me I'm pretty, and I totally denied it xP he's like are too!! Haha. He's nice and like, trustworthy so far. I'm cautious always haha, but it makes me happy to meet a guy that doesn't just want to talk about crude sex crap and begs for nude pics or something. I'm not trying to insult guys, of course, there's just some guys like that online and it gets old fast. xP

Ramble ramble. I just want to talk about it cus I haven't talked to anyone! I want to call my best friend and tell her everything and see if she thinks its stupid lol. But time zones don't work out and if I tell her I don't wanna just type her a novel like this lol. So post it to the diary

I totally fantacize about the sneezy stuff tho... Like either imagining him having a sneezing fit on Skype, even just sneezing once, how nervous I would be about blessing him but... He doesn't know me, he doesn't know I've never blessed people. It's my chance to start and not be called out for it. Or I've imagined myself getting sick and being embarrassed about my voice sounding weird when I talk to him xP it's weird, cus I would be really embarrassed if I were sick in front of a crush like this, but I also kind of want it to happen, it's so authentic and I want to know if they would react in a caring way or would try to make me feel better with jokes or consolation or if they wouldn't even mention it haha. I just wanna know! His cat sneezed when we were skyping earlier today hahahah. That's as close as anything has come. I've felt the urge to sneeze but mind block doesn't allow it, I'm pretty sure I would panic and stifle anyway. But he was just like "oh cat sneezed, that's what that was" haha. I didn't notice it, don't give a crap if his cat sneezes, but hearing him say the word "sneeze" was kinda cute

Other thing keeping me totally awake... My mom is having surgery in about 5 hours I can't sleep, it scared me even though I know it shouldn't. Like, my family doesn't clue me in. And for the past few days I've been hearing about what it will be like, how she won't be able to walk for weeks because they're using a piece from her hip to mold back her breast, so it's like an additional surgery, an additional scar. And ultimately i think it's better that she's reconstructing with her own body and not something synthetic, it's still hard to think about her being so helpless and in pain and I'm so worried I picture her on the operating table, them cutting in to her, and it scares me... And I try not to imagine anything going wrong, but it still creeps in sometimes. They told me that this would get rid of the cancer and she would be fine and only be in the hospital for one night and then be just a little bit sore... But really they won't know until after this surgery if the cancer has spread, she won't be able to walk or move her arms or dress herself or wash her hair or anything, she has to wear button shirts because she won't be able to lift her arms, she has to have all of these special pillows cus she won't be able to sit up on her own... And she doesn't talk about being scared but I know she is. And my dad is just more quiet... And I just don't want it to happen I want her to be healthy, I want it to never have happened. I want her to be happy and painless and independent and I don't want her to lose parts of her body because of this terrible illness. And I know compared to most she's so lucky, and it's almost petty that I'm so upset about this when its so minor compared to other cancer but... I don't care, she's my mom, the surgery is happening so soon, I'm scared. I don't like it.. And I just want someone to sit with me and stay awake with me all night. We don't even have to talk, we can joke or play games or talk about totally normal happy things. I just don't want to be alone all night, picturing all of the horrors and scary things and thinking about how scared my mom must be, how strong she is for not showing it and her trying to sleep right now with this hanging over her head... It's a terrible kind of anticipation. I just want someone to be here and distract me from it, because it doesn't help or change anything for me to be anxious about it. She still needs the surgery, it will save her, it's going to help her. But I still don't like it and I can't have peace about it.

And I haven't told anyone about being worried. People ask me how I'm handling it and I'm like, it's not my problem. It's my poor moms. Don't worry about me, she's the one having to go through this terrible thing. But I'm so worried about it and I over think sooo much. I don't want it to be about me, I just want someone to be with me so I don't think about it. It would be better than worrying about it so much when I should be thankful that this surgery will help, she can use her own body for reconstruction and it'll be more natural, where I live is such a huge city, people from all over the world come here to fight their cancer, the doctors here are GOOD and I should be thankful... I am, I'm just nervous about it actually happening. And about her recovery. I don't want her to be in pain...

So there's more rambling from me haha. My mind is like blehhhh exploding.

Edited June 2, 2014 by BubbleTea

[Hygge]

Hey sooo.. Moms surgery went good. It's a huge relief now, even tho seeing her in pain is hard. Seeing her trying to keep from crying is hard. But I'm super relieved that she's doing well. I only got to see her a few times, was in the hospital waiting around from like 5 AM to 10 PM.

On the subject of sickness, for once it drove me absolutely nuts to hear people sniffling or sneezing or coughing. I'm not a germaphobe, but when we're all in the hospital and people are just like taking huge breaths and forcing themselves to cough with like no signal from their body, they're just forcing it... Who the heck wants to be around that, especially in a hospital. And people just leave their trash everywhere and it's just lame haha. Got on my nerves.

But I'm so freaking glad that mom is doing well. She's in the icu for a night and then will be moved to a regular room for the rest of the week or so.

Haha the friend online that I talk with sometimes makes a sound effect for like people firing a gun as "pachew" and it miiiight turn me on just a little bit, cus every time I'm like...hmm does it ever cross his mind that it kind of sounds like a sneeze, is it weird for me to giggle and try to ignore it, is my reaction going to make it weird? Lol but it's just kind of fun. And he said something that legit sounded like "oh shoot, I'm gonna sneeze" but then turned out that somehow it was actually a raccoon getting into his stuff and he had to go get rid of it. Idk how I heard anything involving sneezing but, ya know, wishful thinking I guess.

[Hygge]

I had little random fever spike thing again. So weird. It just goes up over 100 for like the evening, then better by the morning. No other symptoms. Other than like I was kind of dizzy off and on but not the kind of symptoms I'm looking for :/

So online dude told me something about himself. Don't wanna say what. Not my place really. Just like... Something that shouldn't make a difference, but it kind of does. And I couldn't stop thinking about it, and I just wanted to write about it to get my thoughts cleared but I couldn't stop thinking and couldn't really be calm xP and now it doesn't seem like a big deal. Like, it doesn't make him a different person, he's still the same cool guy, and it's not a problem. I don't know why it bothered me so much at first, I guess just kind of shocking. But really, who cares.

So mom came home. She's doing good. It's awesome that that experience is now behind her. She's still healing and has to keep these tubes on her and stuff and can't stand up straight or lie flat, but she's doing good. She's back to being in good spirits and joking with us and its great

I'm tempted to start devoting my efforts to trying to get sick again. It just seems so hopeless, it's summer, it's soooo hot, no one around is sick, I couldn't even get sick when everyone around me was sick, how can I expect to get sick now? But if I REALLY try... Maybe I can...? Still not gonna jump into it until mom is 100% and stuff but... I want to go all out.

[goju4ryu]

There is something about summer colds. I did have a friend that would hardly ever get sick. She would usually go two or three years without catching a cold. When she did catch a cold it was usually in July. You never know......

[Hygge]

There is something about summer colds. I did have a friend that would hardly ever get sick. She would usually go two or three years without catching a cold. When she did catch a cold it was usually in July. You never know......

Gives me hope! yeah I had a summer cold once, years ago. There definitely is something about being like the only one sick, not as worried about spreading the germs cus they just don't spread well in the heat of summer.

[goju4ryu]

There is something about summer colds!!!! I think its because they are "rare". I remember working at restaurant and one of my coworkers being the only one sick. I don't even know how she got sick. I remember flirting with her a couple years later when I had a cold about her always being sick. I wish I could have caught (or shared) a few colds with her.

[Hygge]

There is something about summer colds!!!! I think its because they are "rare". I remember working at restaurant and one of my coworkers being the only one sick. I don't even know how she got sick. I remember flirting with her a couple years later when I had a cold about her always being sick. I wish I could have caught (or shared) a few colds with her.

That's cute been there, being around someone I really want a cold from and not being able to acquire it... Either because I think the person is so awesome and it would be like an honor to have "their" cold haha, or someone that just has really strong, uncontrollable symptoms that I really want. Even tho I know symptoms aren't always the same for everyone.

The one time I did get a cold during the summer was right after I moved to hot tx. Went back home during the summer. It's much colder there, especially at night. I attended a camp the first week, stayed with family friends a week in between, then was a cabin leader for the little girls at that camp the following week. So the week in between with family friends, the son a few years younger than me had been sick like weeks ago but was still like coughing and stuff. Idk how I managed to catch it in the heat of the summer, at the tail ends of his contagion I'm sure. We were playing through Mario sunshine lol, so we were constantly passing a controller back and forth. I was vaguely aware of the illness and trying to catch it. Not nearly as dedicated as I am now. But I did touch my face, and I remember praying something like "God, please let me get sick..." Then was more like "ok God, if you want to let me get sick I wouldn't mind..." And was just hopeful. Perfect friggin timing, I got to be sick while I was a cabin leader. It wasn't that severe, there was one night in the cabin I could swear I had a fever, felt terrible and restless and hot and cold ya know... But never checked. And the nose symptoms were only bad for a few days, mostly I just got a cough, I always seem to get coughs tho :/

Anyway pretty good for a summer cold. We were like traveling, getting little sleep, didnt have enough blankets and was cold at night, pulled an all nighter with the bestie and stayed awake until about midnight the following night... Ya know, things I try to duplicate in order to get a cold again xP that was like 5 years ago tho. And I also passed it onto the girl who was co cabin leader with me D: we met up the next week and all went out to a movie and she had it xP I felt so bad haha.

[goju4ryu]

I do remember once in school (after moving), a girl that sat beside me had a cold a couple of times in the year. There was one occasion where I was annoying her (as boys do) and she told me, "If you did not stop messing with me, I am going to sneeze on you." Her nose was super bright red. She then went on to say, "You are already exposed to my cold. All it takes is one sneeze and you will catch it." Although she did not sneeze on me, I did catch her cold and at least two more that semester. Every time she had a cold I would get it.

[Hygge]

I do remember once in school (after moving), a girl that sat beside me had a cold a couple of times in the year. There was one occasion where I was annoying her (as boys do) and she told me, "If you did not stop messing with me, I am going to sneeze on you." Her nose was super bright red. She then went on to say, "You are already exposed to my cold. All it takes is one sneeze and you will catch it." Although she did not sneeze on me, I did catch her cold and at least two more that semester. Every time she had a cold I would get it.

Whoa what an opportunity there that's cute. You being a tease and getting a cold from someone cus of it so cute. Yeah I would definitely mess with someone that told me they'd sneeze on me like that. I would accept the challenge, say "I bet you won't" and keep messing with him playfully lol.

I feel like I've been to every germy "breeding ground" but the germs just can't get me. Like schools, stores, casinos, churches, blabla, and touched everything designed to be touched and more. Seriously, there has to be some great and powerful cold out there that I'm not immune to, and I caaant wait to find it.

Online guy friend... He needs a code name... I'll call him... Kodak lol. So Kodak and I were watching attack on Titan together, skyping during it, and he's super tired cus it's like 7 in the morning his time. He's yawning constantly and I'm like "wake up!" And he says he needs me to virtual slap him to keep him awake haha.. Then he starts sniffling and he's like "excuse me, ugh my nose gets all runny when I yawn a bunch... I'm like a little kid" haha. It was cute...

Word.

[goju4ryu]

I am pretty sure my fetish started because of her. It was around that time in my life. Yeah looking back on it now I would have said that haha. There was another thing too with someone else (maybe I was not the only one with the fetish from that school). A girl I did have a huge crush one had caught a cold. She told me she would pay me a quarter (don't ask) to bring her tissues to blow her nose and then take them away.

[Hygge]

I am pretty sure my fetish started because of her. It was around that time in my life. Yeah looking back on it now I would have said that haha. There was another thing too with someone else (maybe I was not the only one with the fetish from that school). A girl I did have a huge crush one had caught a cold. She told me she would pay me a quarter (don't ask) to bring her tissues to blow her nose and then take them away.

Welllll did you do it? The quarter thing? I'd like to say that I would but tbh I would probably be too embarrassed and pretend to be grossed out instead.

Sooo I still Skype with Kodak every day. I really want to sneeze over Skype xP I've had to naturally a few times and just stifled totally silently so he can't hear. But I really want to just sneeze openly, see if he's a blesser or not ya know... I induced a couple of times but got too scared and just stifled them too :/ it's so nerve wracking. We literally Skype for like 5 hours a day or more. Not even kidding. I've still never heard him sneeze, and now I'm like... Ahh I need to do it first cus I want to bless him but what if he's not a blesser himself xP I'm so paranoid about blessing ppl, I want to, but I don't want to draw attention to myself, or offend someone, or whatever. So I'm trying to be bold enough to just do it myself... Maybe tomorrow.

[goju4ryu]

Go for it. You never know what can happen and never pass up potential "opportunities". And besides what is the worse that can happen? Literally, nothing!

I did the pretend to be grossed out. Deer in the headlights type of thing. I was still new into the "fetish" as well. She was always sick too. She even sneezed on me once. I never caught one of her colds though, well not directly from her. I kind of wish I did now. I would have flirted with her and definitely tried to get it off her. It wasn't until high school that I "stole" someone's cold. I remember one of my friends (with a great nose shape I may add) getting a cold. I did not know but I poked her thigh on the bus and she started complaining about how awful she felt. She later took a pack of tissues and blew her nose. I went to her house later and she was constantly having to blow her nose. She would get great runny noses. Anyway I did get it off of her.

[NorthernLady]

Sooo I still Skype with Kodak every day. I really want to sneeze over Skype xP I've had to naturally a few times and just stifled totally silently so he can't hear. But I really want to just sneeze openly, see if he's a blesser or not ya know...

Haha is that a deal breaker if he's not a blesser? ;-) Anyway you gonna have to sneeze to know the answer to that question. Or pretend you just did. Ya know like, getting off camera (like lots of Youtubers do when they sneeze) and when you come back, say, 'sorry, I just sneezed' Or are you just afraid to say the word? Sneeeeeeeeeeze You're a stiffler so it could work. Me, it's a tornado alert with I do, can't fake that

[Hygge]

I did it!! so nerve wracking. I was like... Ugh just do it, but do I need to do it at a time when I'm like "busy" so it's not like I induced it, or wait for a nice silent opportunity to make sure he wouldn't miss it.

Eventually I just did it. We were kind of joking and talking, he was saying something, I turned away from the phone's speaker and was like loud and rough and ehhh... I do have really powerful sneezes haha, but learned to hold them in and usually do that. Feels so refreshing not to tho

So we were like having some conversation, I responded, then he kept talking, then I sneezed, a couple seconds went by, then he said "bless you!" So sweetly and something else like don't get too cold but i was all flustered and missed it and ahhhh I sunk down into my chair and was like "thanks" blushing and trying to not sound super embarrassed.

It went so well Definitely gonna start trying for a cold. Want ittttt. I would definitely be wayy too embarrassed to say the word "sneeze." xP unless he asked "what was that" then I'd suck it up, but I would have to say "it was a sneeze" and not "I sneezed".... Can't say it about myself... And wouldn't say it at all unless I was like forced haha

Edited June 12, 2014 by BubbleTea

[Hygge]

Also btw, we usually just Skype with the voice call, not video. Sometimes we do video, but the talking for 5 hours straight parts its usually voice while we play games, watch movies, do some computer work and stuff...

So we've also been talking more about personal things, like things we've struggled with, stuff in the past ya know... After I posted earlier, I told him some stuff about my past, stuff I totally hate. Hoped it would be a relief because I knew I could trust him and he wouldn't judge me, and he was really supportive and great and everything, but it didn't feel good anyway. Just feel ashamed and like I'll ruin stuff blah blah. But it'll be fine, tomorrow we'll still hang out and nothing will be different, I'm sure. It's just hard for me to say that stuff and will never feel good to say it..

[NorthernLady]

So we were like having some conversation, I responded, then he kept talking, then I sneezed, a couple seconds went by, then he said "bless you!" So sweetly and something else like don't get too cold but i was all flustered and missed it and ahhhh I sunk down into my chair and was like "thanks" blushing and trying to not sound super embarrassed.

Awwwwww my heart is melting from that Well if you manage to get a cold, you could just avoid your family altogether and stay cooped up in your room, chatting and being blessed by him

Ya know, personally, I have no problem saying the word sneeze, or even sneezing in public. Ok, scratch that, I've recently aquired a brand new sneeze block but it's only when I'm with a certain male friend, a shame really... but I can still talk sneeze.

What I can't do however, is talk about fever and illness in general. Specially in relation to me. Last time it happened, it was in a roleplaying game and I got as red as a cooked lobster. Like I was ashamed of my character getting sick. Not me, my character! Strangest experience ever. .

[Hygge]

Awwwwww my heart is melting from that Well if you manage to get a cold, you could just avoid your family altogether and stay cooped up in your room, chatting and being blessed by him

Ya know, personally, I have no problem saying the word sneeze, or even sneezing in public. Ok, scratch that, I've recently aquired a brand new sneeze block but it's only when I'm with a certain male friend, a shame really... but I can still talk sneeze.

What I can't do however, is talk about fever and illness in general. Specially in relation to me. Last time it happened, it was in a roleplaying game and I got as red as a cooked lobster. Like I was ashamed of my character getting sick. Not me, my character! Strangest experience ever. .

Haha man that's kinda how I feel like when reading a story out loud or something. It's not even me, it gives it away by being embarrassed about it, but any time I'd have to read about a sneeze or cough or even illness I'd just be like...uuuhhhh hated it.

Yeah I imagine what my sick scenario would look like right now haha. I would be so embarrassed at first, but I'd still love it... Maybe there would be a day where I was just coming down with it, I wouldn't really admit to it. I'd be sneezy and sniffly but my voice wouldn't be too congested yet. If he asked I might admit to getting sick, but otherwise would try to pretty much conceal it. And the next few days, the way my colds go, my voice would probably be super husky and I'd get a bad cough and be sneezy, nose totally blocked and there would be no denying it. He'd ask to Skype and I'd say okay, but that I'm sick and my voice is stupid and blah xP I don't want to just subject someone to listen to me suffer or something lol. I wouldn't just not mention it and wait for him to point it out first. I just feel self conscious about it lol, I'd apologize and feel like I'm gross and try as best I could to suppress it haha. But I don't think he would mind. And that's what I want... For him to not mind me being gross and sneezy and bleh and still want to chill with me regardless. And I'm pretty sure he wouldn't mind, I would just be a bit embarrassed haha.

Anyway, barely got to talk to Kodak today tho cus our schedules didnt match up. I'd be busy, we'd talk for a sec, then he'd be busy; and he went to bed early cus he didn't sleep much last night. So I'm bummed that I have to hang out alone now :/ but tomorrow will be back to normal.

[Hygge]

Well gonna go ahead and try tonight. Everyone always says that it's germs that make you sick, not cold weather, but After making out with sick people, them coughing in my face, sneezing right next to me, stealing their tissues and sticking them up my nose, doing absolutely everything I can to steal their germs... It's not working. So tonight, I'm staying up all night, sucking on ice cubes, soaked my pajamas and stuck em in the freezer, sleep with my fan on high, and gonna take a cold shower.

I mean, it's summer, it's hot, what can I do? No one is sick. Lets suppose that I maybe could've possibly come into contact with germs being at the movie theater or church or at the sky jump trampoline place the other day or something. Now I'm just desperately trying to awaken them.

[CHOCOLATE <3]

Well gonna go ahead and try tonight. Everyone always says that it's germs that make you sick, not cold weather, but After making out with sick people, them coughing in my face, sneezing right next to me, stealing their tissues and sticking them up my nose, doing absolutely everything I can to steal their germs... It's not working. So tonight, I'm staying up all night, sucking on ice cubes, soaked my pajamas and stuck em in the freezer, sleep with my fan on high, and gonna take a cold shower.

I mean, it's summer, it's hot, what can I do? No one is sick. Lets suppose that I maybe could've possibly come into contact with germs being at the movie theater or church or at the sky jump trampoline place the other day or something. Now I'm just desperately trying to awaken them.

Look forward to the most miserable sleep of your life XD Hopefully it works! I've been sick for a month now, but it's just exhaustion/low grade fevers/headaches/sore throat. Oh, and I pulled a muscle in my back, I was convinced I had a kidney thing,

cuz that's where it hurts, and I went to urgent care, and they gave me four shots of lidocaine in my back because the pain pills they gave me didn't do squat. I also have a viral infection of some sort...she's also thinking some other things are going on.

FUN TIMES HAHA