Concentration (SPN fic)

[MaiMai]

Aah I love this so much! I really like the outsider pov in this, it works really really well. I love your writing style too!

Thank you so much for updating, love it!!

[Sawyer]

Ooh meme....yesyesyes...see, you think you should be more involved before hosting one and I see you as one of the more involved ones. That means *I'm* the noob.

I really liked this part and the perspective from the outsider. Dean's just curt enough and Sam's just sweet enough.

Thank you! I'm so so glad that you liked it!

Hehe and it's so crazy that you say that! I've been around for maybe about fourteen months and I feel like I know this tiny area of the fandom well enough to do something about it, but back when I first joined I was so intimidated!!

Aww, I loved this! Thanks for updating! As ever, its a joy to read your work!

This really means a lot to me, thank you!!

Ohhhh Meme!!! I'll have to check it out! Maybe participate if you don't mind my subpar writing skills

“We gotta book it, c’mon.”

*insert sitcom-style pre recorded laughter here*

Loved it!

Subpar?? Please! You're great! Don't you dare say that! It would be AWESOME if you came and joined!

Oh my god! I didn't even notice the "book it" comment... maybe I did that subconsciously!

Aah I love this so much! I really like the outsider pov in this, it works really really well. I love your writing style too!

Thank you so much for updating, love it!!

You are SO sweet, thank you! I think I'm going to try to stay away from outsider POV for a little while after this, just because this whole thing was, like, over 4000 words and I'm in the mood for something a little more challenging, maybe! It will always be close to my heart, though! I think it's tricky to write it in a way that makes people okay with it so I'm really happy that you liked it!!!

[NorthernLady]

Subpar?? Please! You're great! Don't you dare say that! It would be AWESOME if you came and joined!

Oh... *blush* Okay TY

[SexualOddity]

Hey there, sorry I didn't get back to this tonight. I had the laptop stolen from my grasp. I've read it now though and I really like it. I kinda want more! Like, I want to know how Sam is when they get back to the motel. I assume from the end that the curse has allowed the cold to get hold of him a lot quicker and I can imagine Dean being all like, 'Okay then, time to stop denying feeling bad, and let me get serious about looking after you.' But I guess that can't work because, why would your OC be there? But maybe there could be a separate non-third-person fic that carries on after this. Maybe I'll prompt you on your meme. (So excited!)

But yeah, I'll just carry on my list!

9. I like the backstory for the ghost. It sounds like a believable local legend. And I like that it wasn't your character's favourite story or anything, just something that she's familiar with. Occassionally with OCs it feels to me like EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IS RELATED TO SOMETHING SUPER MAJOR IN THEIR LIFE. Yours is a lot more relaxed and I like that.

10. I like the way that your OC seems so conscious, telling the story, that no one will believe what she's saying, and how she uses everyday comparisons to try to explain. And she can't remember the sayings! She's so cute and down to Earth. It's nice.

11. I love her perspective on the salt! Oh gosh, how weird must that seem to her!

12. '"You have a flashlight? … Ah, okay, jeez, watch where you point that thing.”

I find this the hottest thing in the whole second part (the hottest thing in the whole thing being the bit where she turns on the light ap in the first part). He doesn't even sneeze! It just brings up a whole raft of things in my imagination... like, he was about to sneeze, and when he says that he's turned away and hunched over and is scrubbing frantically at his nose. AND it makes me thing about allll the times that they must have a similar situations with the flashlights, and how Dean knows exactly what he's talking about without him actually saying it, but obviously sometimes he forgets and... and... in short this set me off on a really enjoyable photicSam daydream.

13. I love her trying to get out of the habit of using the nicknames, Just so normal and believable.

14. I love all of your spellings always but this one: Ht’ktTSHuh! is just my favourite ever. I think that the halting, hitching, catch in someone's breath before a sneeze is crazy hot, and you really get that with the apostrophe and all the consonants at the beginning.

15. Mmmm... I like the idea of Sam catching a sneeze with his arm wrapped across his face and waiting there (probably still feeling all tickly) wondering if he needs to sneeze again.

16. I love how the sneezing gets more powerful immediately when the curse hits, like he just can't put up any resistance to them. There's something remarkably sexy about that. And THEN it gets even better later because he's not able to rub them away or restrain them at all and they are rocking him forward and -oh- the hair! The floppy hair in his eyes!

17. Vision reference! And as a consequence... early season boys! Oh they were so cute!

18. “This isn’t… uhh… no, Dean, this is something else."

Aw Sammy! Still not wanting to admit to being sick!

19. Even though he's all wobbly!

20. Mmm... fluttery eyed sneezy Sam looking up and catching things! I must have read hundreds of sneezefics, but you always manage to come up with a ton of new and sexy images that I've never considered before. You're amazing.

I always enjoy your stories so much. Seriously, I'm so grateful for another one. Can't wait to meme with you!

[Sawyer]

Ahhh! Oh my god! You've got me sitting here like, smiling and fanning myself and jumping around because oh my god, oh my god, you give such AMAZING feedback! I went and read your post, like, probably at least five times before being able to verbalize any sort of response!

I know that I've said it before but it is suuuuch a relief when people say that they like my OCs! Because the point of them (for me) is to have the narration be from a different perspective than what I'm used to, and that's why I don't usually give physical descriptions or even names to them because they aren't what's important, it's all about the narration! So I'm really really happy that you caught that!

Same for the backstory! I am very very disorganized and I have a pretty short attention span most of the time, plus I'm not super creative so big plot stuff has never been easy for me! So it's cool to know that you thought it was okay! That's always the stuff that I'm the most nervous about!

And on the topic of photicSam... oh man, wow, I'm going to be daydreaming about that for the rest of the evening too! It's one of my favorite things because it's just so normal, but weird enough for normal-normal to people to think that it's kind of strange/unbelievable, and it can also happen whenever so you don't even need to think up a big allergic/ill circumstance for it to happen, even though there's still a cause! So that's nice!

ANYWAY. Thank you so much (seriously, I can't say it enough!) aaaaaand I've got the meme rules and everything all typed out so look for that either on Sunday or Monday! (And I'll probably advertise it a little bit here, too.)

Edited November 30, 2013 by Sen Beret

[Anilkex]

Please mention the meme here or at least give the real newbies a link to it. I'm live journal deficient, apparently, and can't find you. :/

[Sawyer]

Please mention the meme here or at least give the real newbies a link to it. I'm live journal deficient, apparently, and can't find you. :/

Oh yeah, absolutely! Don't worry girl I've got your back! I think it's going to go up tomorrow actually because I just can't wait (I'd do it tonight but I'm typing this from my phone since I'm at a job right now) and I'll be sure to post the link!

(In case you were wondering, my journal is senberet dot livejournal dot com, but a lot of the entries are friends-locked so if you have an account you can send me a request! But if you don't, you don't have to worry because the meme will be viewable to everyone with anonymous posting enabled.)

[NorthernLady]

I think it's going to go up tomorrow actually because I just can't wait

You got me so hyped about this meme thing that I went and created a Livejournal just for the occasion Make way for Foxonthemoon, with the little Cas as a profile picture I'll try to find you and ad you as a friend Sen Beret!

[Anilkex]

(In case you were wondering, my journal is senberet dot livejournal dot com,

Heyyyyyyy...no space....I'm brilliant. Thank you!

[Sawyer]

You guys have shown such awesome enthusiasm and I was going to wait until a little later in the day to get to posting until I realized that some of you live pretty further East than I do (thus, different timezones!) and I wouldn't want to make you wait until tomorrow if I promised to have it up today!

So, here it is!

As per Oddity's request, I've done a prologue! It's pretty short, but I thought I would post it here too!

-

-

“Alright, Sammy, what gives?”

“Huh?” Sam’s rubbing his hair with a cheap motel room towel in an attempt to dry it, having gotten soaked during the walk from the library to the impala, and then again from the car to the room. As a result (of either the rain or something else), he hasn’t stopped shivering since he was hit with the library ghost’s stupid curse in the first place.

“The ladder’s barbequed, man, curse is over. And we’re out of the dusty library. I know it wasn’t just allergies back there, so are you going to give in and let me dose you up or what?”

“I’ll do it,” Sam mumbles begrudgingly, hanging on to whatever dignity he feels the need to protect. Then, he adds, “I’m fine, Dean. It’s just – hp’ISHCHuh! – just a cold,” as he starts to get up to search through their first aid kit for their half-empty bottle of NyQuil. Instead, he stumbles over his own feet and knocks himself back into the desk chair.

Dean’s eyebrows fly up, and he rises to get the medicine for Sam instead. “Okay, you know what? You stay put. I’m wondering if maybe that thing latched onto you at the last minute or something, kept the curse in place…”

Slowly, Sam shakes his head, and then reaches up to rub at his temples. “I was already getting sick. The curse probably juhhh-ust sped up the pro… process. Uhh’hhHdtCHEW! CHSHHEW! Sniff! Ugh.”

“You should tell me these things so we can prepare better,” Dean chides. He pours the dark green cold syrup into a tiny plastic cup, and while handing it to Sam, he promises, “I’ll pick up some more tomorrow. This should tide you over for now.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” Sam swallows it back like a shot, wincing and coughing afterwards. “I’ll try to sleep it off. Be good to go tomorrow.”

And Dean can see the brightness in his brother’s eyes that warns of an impending fever, and the way he keeps rubbing his temples suggests a migraine coming on. The worst isn’t over yet, not by a long shot, so Sam won’t be able to stay true to his word.

Dean pulls back his own comforter and moves to switch off the light. “Okay dude. Right here if you need me.”

But nothing can stop Dean from staying true to his.

[Skyler]

“The ladder’s barbequed, man, curse is over. "

Omg, I laughed so much! True Dean talk I think - The ladder is barbequed. Not burnt...BARBEQUED! You made my day with one word

Anyways, overall it was fab, I'm a little confused though. This is a prolouge...? I thought it was another part?

[Sawyer]

Oh my god, you're right! I definitely meant EPILOGUE! I mixed the words up! I have no idea why I did that!

But thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!

[NorthernLady]

But... but.... you need to continue this! *big puppy eyes*

It sounds like an ending but...

The worst isn’t over yet, not by a long shot, so Sam won’t be able to stay true to his word.

Don't let us (me) hanging after such a sentence o_o

[SexualOddity]

Oooh! Oooh! Hinting at more? Did I hear hinting at MORE???

Just to let you know... I would be a fan of more.

Yep.

[Sawyer]

You guys just won't let this one rest!! Which I'm taking as a pretty big compliment (thank you!!!!)

So, probably some time soon, I'll add a little more. Stay tuned...

[SexualOddity]

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!

[Anilkex]

Moooooore!

[Skyler]

More is always appriciated

[MaiMai]

You guys just won't let this one rest!!

It's too awesome to let it rest!! And on another note...

YAAAAYYYYYYY MMMOOOORRRRREEEE! *flails*

[NorthernLady]

WAAAAMOREOFTHIISPLEAAAAASE

(Sorry still a little drunk frmo xmas party... I'l have plenty of time to be ashamed in the morning tho)

[iluvsneezes]

Yay, I cannot wait to read more of this story!!