Feverish Work

[coldcure08]

Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club, (much to my boyfriend’s relief). Meant to be my first real comedy: The x-men story was only funny because of a “one-line”er at the end to the story SO IT DOESN’T COUNT, OKAY?!?

Synopsis: The twins come into school with bad colds. They ask to be excused from Host Club duties, but Tamaki makes them attend anyway. Kyoya (par usual) makes money off of it. Tamaki ends up paranoid about Haruhi getting too close to the invalids. Enjoy. In true Ouran style, One-sided romance Tamaki>Haruhi, everyday twincest (slightly suggestive), and Kyoya is apathetic.

For non-otakus, these J-phrases in the story are as follows:

Ohayo/Ohayo Gozaimasu = Good Morning!

Ano = Um…

Daijoubu/Daijoubu desuka = Are you okay?

Arigato = Thanks!

Feverish Work:

By: Lorea08

“

(sniffle-sniffle) Ohayo, Haruhi. (Sniffle)” Haruhi glanced up to see the twins standing next to her desk, looking tired and sounding rather stuffed up. Doing a slight double-take, Haruhi took in the sight of the pair: they sported pink tinged noses and cheeks; were sniffling incessantly; and carried various cold-care items; tissue packets, cough drops, and fever-medication.

“Uh… Ohayo Gozaimasu… Ano, Kaoru? Hikaru? Daijoubu desuka?” Haruhi blinked disbelievingly at the tired faces before her.

“Actually…”

“Actually…”

The twins paused in unison: their faces contorted strangely. Haruhi realized suddenly that they were…

“Hetschhh!”

“Actchuhh!”

Going to sneeze…

“Bless you, Kaoru-kun, Hikaru-kun.” Haruhi remarked.

“Arigato.”

“Arigato.” The twins replied. Hikaru sniffled,

“We caught colds yesterday. Our family doctor said we shouldn’t come in today, but we had to get the homework packet for this class.”

“Of course,… Heh-Hetsschh! This will mean no Host Club today… And mi’lord will not be happy with us.” Said Kaoru, rubbing his nose.

“But if you are sick, he can’t expect you to stay, can he?” asked Haruhi, still somewhat unaware of the extent of Tamaki’s determination.

Hikaru rolled his eyes, and sniffled, “Haruhi, Temaki-sempai is obsessed with the host club… You wait… ahhhnd… see… Heh-chuh!” He blew his nose wetly into a couple of tissues in his hand. Haruhi shrugged, but she guessed that she was not going to look forward to today’s host club…

Hours later, the final bell to end classes chimed and streams of students bustled from one hall to the next to their respective activities and entertainments. Down the fourth corridor, in the third music room, the preparations for the day’s host club are underway. As Haruhi enters, she can hear the twins arguing with Tamaki…

“But, milord!...”

“We’re sick!”

“NONSENSE!!!” Tamaki boomed, his volume rising with dramatic flair, “We are but servants,… nay, SLAVES to beauty! The entertainment and pleasure of young ladies is our lifeblood! We shall not let anything prevent this noble cause! We, as members of this auspicious club, seek to bring brilliant conversation and gentle affection to those who truly deserve such a gift! A gift that only we can provide! You cannot abandon your true…”

“Farewell, milord!”

“Farewell, milord!”

The twins turned and began to walk out. Tamaki began to weep and sob but to no avail… The pair had almost reached the door, when Kyouya, appearing from nowhere, like he usually does, snapped his cell-phone shut.

“Well, I’ve notified your driver that he is not to pick you up from school; I will have you driven home after the host club activities are complete.”

Tamaki turned and shouted,

“I knew you couldn’t abandon the young ladies who desire your company!!!” with exaggerated tears flowing down his cheeks.

Hikaru clenched his hand into a fist and Kaoru sighed, half-heartedly agreeing with his brother. Haruhi, blushing angrily, stood before Kyouya.

“You can’t keep them here if they’re sick! It’s just cruel!” Kyouya merely scribbled in his notebook. Haruhi growled a little under her breath and suddenly had an idea,

“What about the guests? Who will come back here if they get sick from Kaoru and Hikaru? They are probably still contagious, and the longer they stay here the greater the odds are that we will all get sick. Then who will run the Host Club?”

Tamaki was at her side in a flash of ostentatious movement,

“MOMMY!!! You would never dream of putting our beloved daughter at risk of catching the viruses of those audacious twins?!? Haruhi!” He spun towards her pointing his finger, “You are to stay away from that un-wholesome pair for the entire day!”

Hikaru muffled a sneeze into his hands:

“HATCHmmmff! Milord, you do realize that we have been with Haruhi all day already…? I think that her odds of catching this bug are better than anyone else’s.”

Tamaki began to run around in circles wailing,

“KYOUYA!!! DO SOMETHING!!!”

Kyouya smirked a little at her defensiveness.

“That’s why I’ve taken the liberty of supplying face masks for our guests at the door, (along with a contagion waiver, of course) so that they can see the dedication and perhaps a more vulnerable side of the Host Club… As for Haruhi, she has an excellent immune system, or so her school medical records show… Never missed a day of classes… This should prove interesting though, hhmmm…” He mused and walked over to his favorite chair sitting down, not un-like a prince upon his throne.

Hikaru glared at the shadow king,

“What do you mean by that statement?” But Kaoru touched his twin’s shoulder,

“Brother, just… hheh… g-give up…hehhh… w-we aren’t going to win this,… t-this… HETSHH! one. Let’s just make the best of this.” He sniffled and blew his nose honking slightly into a handkerchief.

<Ho’kay, So, I will try to have Chapter two up soon… Encouragement is appreciated! Pudding-popsicles for reviewers!>

[VoOs]

Bwahaha, oh god, this is brilliant! Your Drama queen!Tamaki is so spot-on.

Love. Yes.

More? *puppy eyes*

[Kimiki]

I spy...TRUE LOVE!!! I love this more than anything...continue, please!!!

[chui]

YATTA!!!!!!!!!! omg.... so cute! *luffs on* <3 this is just toooo wonderful, and the sneezing in tandem i cannot wait for part two!!!!!

[Spoo]

OURAN!! KYAAAH!!

You, my dear, are brilliant. We definitely need some more of this wonderful series on this forum.

I'm looking forward to more!

[Illiana]

Wonderful! I can't wait to read more. Twins, sneezing TOGETHER! *__* Ah, bliss~!

[le mouchoir]

Tamaki made me laugh out loud!

Too cute! Twins + sick + sneezing at the same time = awesomeness. n__n

[DemonMolly]

HAAAAAAUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!! MUST HAVE MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Please write the next part!!!! I need my Hikaru and Kaoru sneezing

[daystar428]

very fun i can't wait to see what the twins do next.

[blackrose]

i cant wait! this is going to be good!

[Elle]

Mmmmm...sneezy twins. Can't wait for more!

[blackrose]

umm... will this ever be continued?

[ichixshiro14]

Awww that was a great start

[coldcure08]

My sincerest apologies for not continuing this story for such a ridiculously long time. There was a very dark place of no imagination that I was in for a very long time. (sad face) I am dragging myself out bit by bit. I hope this update and finishing chapter, although long in coming, is better than my usual drivel. The favorite bits are in there but I have to attempt to set the scene. (wink)

Feverish Work (cont.)

The school bell chimed 3pm at Ouran Academy. The door handles to the 3rd music room gleamed gold in the afternoon sunlight. The doors swung inwards in a flurry of rose petals. The cluster of girls at the door shuffled nervously as one by one they received their masks, signed their release forms, and went to join with their hosts.

Tamaki was dressed in a costume reminiscent of a barkeep from the late 1800’s complete with a pin-stripe waistcoat. He was behind a bar, but instead of alcohol, he had a plethora of different types of teas; which he was preparing for all his princesses seated at the bar. He charmed and flirted with each young lady in turn.

“Tamaki, may I have some sugar for my tea?”

“Oh,... But I think you are sweet enough already!” He whispered, getting tantalizingly close and staring into her eyes. The girl nearly fainted.

“Will you take milk in yours, my princess? The tea should pale in comparison to your beauty.”

“Oh… Tamaki!”

One girl’s gaze drifted from the king of the host club to two figures wrapped in blankets and reclining on a plush velvet couch in the center of the room. A small group of girls were surrounding the couch, staring longingly at the twins. The golden-haired boy followed her gaze and smiled knowingly. He reached across the bar, taking her chin gently in his hand,

“A penny for your thoughts, pretty one?”

“I… I just was wondering if Kaoru and Hikaru are going to be alright.”

“Never fear, dear one, although they have been struck down by illness, they care for their guests too much to allow a mere cold to prevent them from carrying out their duties as hosts.”

Meanwhile, Mori and Hunni were entertaining their guests by helping them to create get well cards for their sick compatriots. Mori was helping Hunni to paste a bunny onto a card covered in drawings of sweets and cake. Hunni had accidentally pasted flowers and glitter onto himself.

“Takashi! Help me!” Hunni wailed. Mori took a damp cloth and softly removed the misplaced decorations.

“Hmmm. Mitskuni…”

Hunni gave Mori a big cuddly hug, and all of their guests cooed and squealed happily at the adorable hosts.

In the north side of the room there was a little kitchenette set up , a clump of five girls were helping Haruhi to prepare some soup for the ailing Hitachins.

“Haruhi, which vegetables need to be washed?”

Haruhi smiled at the girl, using her genuine charm.

“Actually, they are all washed and ready they just need to be cut. Thank you all for helping me, again. I really appreciate it. And I know Kaoru and Hikaru will too. I always loved this soup when I wasn’t feeling well.”

“Is this one of your mother’s recipes, Haruhi?”

“Yes, it is. I believe she would think you all are so wonderful to think of others in this way.” Haruhi sighed and looked towards the couch sadly, “I just wish there was something more I could do for them.”

Kyoya looked on with approval as each group of young ladies “ooohed and aahhhed” over their hosts techniques. A bit too “on the fly” for his usual style… but then, opportunity knocks but once, as they say. Kyoya began to calculate the estimated profits for the club based on sales of pictures and get well cards when suddenly a harsh sound cut through the almighty din of the room.

“HETSCHUUHH!”

Hikaru sneezed emphatically, and was, consequently, immediately handed a tissue by a fan girl (Kyoya practically heard a cash register jingle, as the small “care kits” he had added to the inventory of “For sale” items began to bear fruit.)

Kaoru sniffled,

“Bless you, Hikaru…” he murmured softly, “It sounds like your cold’s getting worse.” He gently reached up and placed his palm gently across Hikaru’s forehead. His voice quavered slightly, as he added, “Your fever has gone up too.”

“I’m sorry, Kaoru, I don’t mean to w-wuh- worry you.” Hikaru bit back the sneeze that threatened to overtake him. He sniffled, rubbing the tip of his nose with the bridge of his index finger. “I should have taken better care of myself…”

“No, Hikaru, it’s all my fault… If I wasn’t so weak, I wouldn’t have caught this bug in the first place.” Kaoru lowered his gaze, seemingly embarrassed. “Then you wouldn’t have tried to take care of me and… hh… hehh… Hetscch! Hetcch! HETTSCCCH!!” Kaoru sneezed violently, and then collapsed weakly against his cushions.

“Oh, Kaoru… I couldn’t help myself… you looked so cold last night in our bed all alone.” Hikaru reached out to caress Kaoru’s cheek, “And I’m not the only one who has a fever.”

The fangirls cried out in ecstasy as the brothers gazed into each others eyes.

Hikaru grabbed a tissue from a nearby guest and gently held it up to Kaoru’s nose,

“Here… Blow.” Kaoru blushed intensely, but obliged with a soft low gurgle.

“Hikaru…” Kaoru murmurred. Hikaru smiled tiredly and picked up a cup from the table.

“Let me get you some tea, Kaoru… I’ll be…” Hikaru started to cough, unable to catch his breath, he curled in on himself.

“Hikaru! Don’t! Please…”

Kaoru grabbed his twin’s arm and pulled him into an embrace, cradling the older boy against his chest.

Soon, the coughing subsided and an exhausted Hikaru was soon asleep. Kaoru continued to smile and chat amicably with the young ladies but, the long day was beginning to take it’s toll. Kaoru’s nose began to wrinkle with a slight itch that began in his sinuses. He wanted to rub his nose but his arms were pinned beneath Hikaru. Kaoru sniffled discreetly, to try to dispel the slowly growing tickle. Kaoru started to sweat, if he moved his arms he would wake Hikaru , but if he didn’t do something soon his nose would wake the other boy instead.

“(Sniff) nnnh…”

His brow creased in irritation. The sensation was building, even faster now. Kaoru’s guests noticed his discomfort.

“Um… Kaoru-kun… Are you alright?”

“Hh… Hai… I… I’m f-fine.”

Unfortunately, his nose had other plans…

“Heh… (sniff) Hehh-Hehhh!” His breath hitched softly, desperately. Finally, his worn-out system could no longer hold back the tide.

“Hetscch! Hetcch! HETTSCCCH!! hetssch! Heh-Hetsschhh! Heteschh! Heh-HEH-HETTTSSCHH!”

Kaoru turned in towards the couch to protect his twin and the ladies from the vicious onslaught. Hikaru awoke with a jolt.

“Kaoru?!?”

The younger twin gasped for air as another fit overtook him, “Heh-HEH-HETTTSSCHH! Hetscch! Hetssch! Het-tescch! Hetchhh! Hetttschh!”

Hikaru pulled out a handkerchief with the initials “HH” in the corner. Gently, he cupped it over his brother’s face and rubbed Kaoru’s back with the other.

“Easy, Kaoru… easy… Try blowing.”

Kaoru obeyed. Tears welled up in the younger twin’s eyes.

“What Kaoru? Does it hurt? Are you okay?” Hikaru asked, sounding panicked.

Kaoru whispered, “I’m sorry, Hikaru.”

Hikaru punched the dark wooden accents of the velvet couch.

“Stupid!” he cried, “Do you really think that matters to me?” Hikaru furiously wiped away tears of his own, “Stupid… I only care that my baby brother is alright.” He held Kaoru close to him.

Kaoru looked into his twin’s face and smiled.

Hikaru smiled back and then he collapsed.

“HIKARU!!!”

Hours later, Hikaru woke to find himself lying in a bed covered up to his neck in comforters and quilts. Haruhi was beside the bed.

“How are you feeling, Hikaru?”

“Nngh… better, I think… What happened?”

“Your fever spiked...Tamaki dismissed the guests and Kyoya’s family doctor came to check on you. I don’t think they will try this particular brand of hosting again.” Haruhi smiled the special smile that she saved for when she was alone with someone she trusts, “I’m glad you’re alright though. Your fever broke an hour ago.”

Hikaru sat upright in bed, “Is Kaoru alright?”

“He’s fine. Still tired and coughing a lot, but the doctor says he will be fine as well. You really scared him.” Haruhi shook her head, “You two are really something else… Try to get some rest.”

Hikaru lay back in bed dutifully, letting Haruhi cover him back up, and smiling, he slipped into dreams that were of anything but the host club.

Haruhi crept out of the room silently, closing the door behind her. Immediately, Tamaki was clinging to her like white on rice and was sobbing hysterically,

"MOMMY! Those diseased twins spent way too much time with our Haruhi! Her health is at stake!!! DO SOMETHING!"

Haruhi sighed,

"Here we go again..."

THE END (at last)

PS. I tried 31 times to write this next chapter. Over the course of 5 years. Holy crapola. I hope you can forgive me for slacking off for so long.

Love & Light

Coldcure08

[Elle]

Well I greatly enjoyed getting to read the rest of it! Worth the wait! (And it admittedly makes me feel better about taking months before posting a new chapter in my own stories...)

[coldcure08]

Thank you E.C., I had the hardest time trying to finish that.